"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How about a NEWBIE Handle?

Mukester

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How about a newbie handle?

We are getting loads of very AFC posts on the forum. I know its great that we all help each other, but some people are just coming onto this forum, spilling they're guts how they got dumped and wanting a response, without even having any concept of anything slightly DJ.

Any thoughts....?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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junglist

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what do you mean by "handle"?

Personally, as a newbie, I think your idea has merit insofar as I understand it to mean that newbies should be directed towards learning dj concepts before whining about their problems. But is this not what the bible is for?
 

Mukester

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Originally posted by Edge:
Maybe we should have used this idea on you when you first started...
-Where's the smiley that blushes..? Good research, Edge!

Originally posted Junglist:
by what do you mean by "handle"?
-Yeah the theory is sound but many dont read the bible and post regardless. By "handle" i mean that little 'id tag' under your name that refers to you as a 'don juan'. I reckon that by having a newbie handle it would ensure the 'newbies' realsie that they gotta make an effort and do a bit of reading before they post. It would also allow other DJ's to traget their efforts more effectively
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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SexPDX

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All this posting about finding ways to distinguish more experienced members or "masters" from newbies is getting a little out of hand IMO.

You can tell from the post whether or not it is a newbie posting and if you can't then you are most likely a newbie yourself.

If you want to see the redundant posting decline, volunteer to be a mod if you care that much. This board is lax on moderation. I am not complaining, just observing. The GOOD thing about lax moderation is that it helps the quality of conversation. The BAD thing, however, is that it diminishes the quality of MATERIAL because the forum becomes cluttered with redundant discussions. Maybe somewhere in between is the way to go, but I really doubt coming up with new ways of deciding who is or is not a newbie is really going to help the problem.

-PDX
 

darkhorse

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Originally posted by SexPDX
If you want to see the redundant posting decline, volunteer to be a mod if you care that much. This board is lax on moderation. I am not complaining, just observing. The GOOD thing about lax moderation is that it helps the quality of conversation. The BAD thing, however, is that it diminishes the quality of MATERIAL because the forum becomes cluttered with redundant discussions. Maybe somewhere in between is the way to go, but I really doubt coming up with new ways of deciding who is or is not a newbie is really going to help the problem.

-PDX

Here's a fairly simple solution to this that could be added to the forum setup. Moderators could have a control that let's them flag threads or posts within threads as clutter. Likewise, posters could choose whether to view the board with the clutter added or not shown. If the board was viewed with clutter added, the poster could also choose whether to have the clutter have a different background color. I'm not a big bulletin board poster so I don't know if this feature is already provided in a bulletin board somewhere, but it would be fairly simple to implement.

Of course, the downside to this is the bullsh*t politics of what gets flagged as clutter or not. Personally, I think the less moderation the better.
 

SexPDX

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Originally posted by darkhorse
Here's a fairly simple solution to this that could be added to the forum setup. Moderators could have a control that let's them flag threads or posts within threads as clutter. Likewise, posters could choose whether to view the board with the clutter added or not shown. If the board was viewed with clutter added, the poster could also choose whether to have the clutter have a different background color. I'm not a big bulletin board poster so I don't know if this feature is already provided in a bulletin board somewhere, but it would be fairly simple to implement.

Of course, the downside to this is the bullsh*t politics of what gets flagged as clutter or not. Personally, I think the less moderation the better.
OR you could just develop clear posting guidelines, post a link to said guidelines in a prominent spot on the board and anything that is CLEARLY clutter based on those guidelines can be REMOVED when encountered by a mod. And anyone who KEEPS posting "clutter" can be banned.

The political issues disappear once there are agreed upon posting guidlines that all posters are made aware of. I don't, however, see much point to calling something "clutter" then leave it there when it would be just as easily deleted altogether.

-PDX
 

darkhorse

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Originally posted by SexPDX
I don't, however, see much point to calling something "clutter" then leave it there when it would be just as easily deleted altogether.

-PDX

Maybe "clutter" was a poor choice of words. The point was to try to deal with the bad results of lax moderation you mentioned while also preserving its good results. Allowing user-selectable views of material would keep the forum an open one while also allowing people a tighter restriction of content if they so wish. The selection could also be done in the opposite direction - moderators could flag material as "choice" material that's quality and dead on the subject. People could choose to view only that material or could choose to view the wider range of discussion of the full board.
 

Sisko

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Well I know when I came here I read all the tips in the Hall of Fame. Then I registered to the forum, read The Bible, and started posting.

There should be more pressure on the new guys to read at least the HS Bible, and then start to post.

Further more, I agree with Nick, that if you can't tell whats bullSh!t
then you are probably a newb.
If anykind of filter is considered, it should be considered to help the newbs.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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