I dont know what it is, but this girl that i have been going out with for about a month gives me the out of the blue "i'm in a predicament... i dont know if i can go out with you cause im busy..." Then i was like maybe you should leave now, but she wouldnt leave saying she didnt want to, and ended up leaving like 2 hours later from my house. What do u think is up?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Hit with the "i dont really have time"
- Thread starter oElS
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
I think she forgot to add: "I'm buzy with another guy" - that is what it seems to boil down too. Women who love a guy often go out of their way to make time for their men and not distance themselves from him, if she is buzy and give you that line then there is a reason for it.
quote: oElS
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"really... even if she still calls me comes up and talks to me as well?? And yeah i did suspect that the guy thing."
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women are sometimes like monkeys, they won't let go of one tree branch until they can firmly hold onto another.
If this woman is seeing another guy, then she is waiting for their relationship to grow more and once that happen she will tell you " she met someone else" - the reason you are still around is because you are the a fallback guy, she hates being alone and rather keep company with you then nothing.
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"really... even if she still calls me comes up and talks to me as well?? And yeah i did suspect that the guy thing."
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women are sometimes like monkeys, they won't let go of one tree branch until they can firmly hold onto another.
If this woman is seeing another guy, then she is waiting for their relationship to grow more and once that happen she will tell you " she met someone else" - the reason you are still around is because you are the a fallback guy, she hates being alone and rather keep company with you then nothing.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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- Nov 15, 2004
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- 11,680
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What's happening is she's lost interest in you, but she wants to keep you as a backup in case things don't work out between her and this new guy. You're bound to hear the "I still want to be friends" 5hit sooner or later.
If she doesn't have time to date you, she doesn't want to make time to date you.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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- Nov 15, 2004
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There's lots of hot women out there. Leave her alone so she can soak in her emotions. She's the one who tried to break it off first. The b1tch shouldn't be feeling rejected, but she is now because you took her power away from her with that one word.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
The hor says, "I don't have the time" - the pimp replies, "Get a timepiece (watch) biatch!!"
Don't call or talk to her again - a waste of time!! She mat be hot but she disrespected you by verbalizing such a lame excuse!!!
Don't call or talk to her again - a waste of time!! She mat be hot but she disrespected you by verbalizing such a lame excuse!!!
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
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- May 21, 2004
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- 1,887
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- 12
Earlier this year I dated a girl that worked 2 part-time jobs, was on the university waterpolo team, and had a full courseload at our university. We still hooked up at least once a week, most of the times twice. Generally we didn't have time to go out, so most of the time we'd just go to her place or mine, which was fine with me.
Point of the story? If a girl is interested in you and wants you, she will make time for you.
Don't put up with flakes, cut this b!tch out of your life.
Peace.
Point of the story? If a girl is interested in you and wants you, she will make time for you.
Don't put up with flakes, cut this b!tch out of your life.
Peace.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
I agree with what everyone here has said. I posted a while back about a girl I met from the internet in person who also happened to be a hottie.. And after that day I asked her out again but she kept coming up with the "I'm too busy with work and school" line. About a week ago she said something that made me etch her from my mind for good: "I only have one day of the week off." If this girl was REALLY interested, she would look forward to that day off of the week to be with me. But she's not interested, and i'm fine with that. I've nexted her and reserved my energies for someone who I know will give me the time of day. You should do the same.