"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
$hit tests = enigmas
- Thread starter penkitten
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Lol, this is the same girl who everyone thought was a bytch. Why the hell would I want to fall for a girl everyone thinks is a bytch? You guys tried to tell me too. Geez, now that it's over and I'm getting some perspective I realize how much work I have to do on my own self image, that I would allow myself to get on this merry-go-round with a girl who was so abrasive in the first place. I just fell for her adoration of me. I know she cared about me, but she wasn't good FOR ME.jophil28 said:
I guess you get experience by getting experience.
I did, and thanks. You are right-- I attracted a girl who probably had some issues, as I had some issues. I was working on getting my head together, raising my standards for myself, learning to treat myself well, and that's when she disappeared. I'm going to keep working on my self image and standards, and I know that like you say, I will attract someone who mirrors that back TO me.Charm said:
I'm glad I started posting here again, it's a sign that I'm ready to learn from the lesson she taught me, and for the first time in a few months I'm actually looking forward to turning my life around, and drawing positive influences into my life. Right-on.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.