"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Help the AFC or chill?

Let AFCs live or Attempt to save him?


  • Total voters
    12

Thatfeel21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
Messages
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Location
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If u saw a person obviously an AFC, say at work or a party you're at, would you pull him aside and give him advice on how it REALLY is?? I'm talking a decent looking guy or a guy that deserves better but doesnt know better...
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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MotownMack

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2008
Messages
373
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11
Funny, I was at a birthday party the other day and had the same thoughts.

There was an HB8 that was friend of a friend-that never met me, but wanted to meet me (I won't get into the story of how this came about). We talked for maybe 5 minutes at this party, and it was ok-don't think I did a great job, but made good eye contact, was ****y, etc.

Anyway, when I got to the party, which was at a bar open to the public, she had been talking to two guys. One was following her around the entire time, and to my knowledge, was someone who was not with the "party" but someone she'd met at the bar.

The guy was following her around the bar like a puppy, it was pretty pathetic. The funny part is, I caught her looking at me twice (after she'd run off from our conversation and didn't come back), when I was talking to a girl I've known for a while. The girl I was talking to had b/f, it was just friendly chat, but the HB8 is new to the circle, so I am sure she didn't know that (a little social proof at work maybe?)

Anyway, her body language as she moved around the bar, compared to his inferior body language, was very obvious to me. And 5-10 years ago, she was probably an HB9, so I have no doubt she probably falls into the category of woman that this stuff we talk about on her was pretty much written for. Even though this guy was technically competition, I almost wanted to pull him aside and say "Dude, wtf are you doing?" I did point out his behavior to a few AFC friends of mine, and even they-with their limited knowledge-agreed.

I say if it's a friend, then casually mention your observations. If it's not someone you know-as was my case- you're likely just to offend them, so I wouldn't bother.
 

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
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In real life I only try to help those who ask help of me.

I think thats the way you have to go to avoid offending anyone and getting angry words spewed at you when you were only trying to help.
 

Yahooey

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
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Location
Elysium
I don't try and completely reform the AFC. If it is a "friend", I will give them tips to help them - and stop my inner cringing.

AFC's that are strangers are a different subject. On more than one occasion, the presence of an AFC competing in a set has helped me - the contrast between the AFC and the DJ in me is immediate, compensates for some of the weaknesses in my game and increases attraction.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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