"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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*He approaches bowing in reverence*

CyranoDeBergerac

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Humbly I come before you computer gods to ask what shall be done about one Mallory Max or whatever her name is (see post " You guys are pathetic" in the DJ forum)
She reaks of negativity, bad kharma, and Body Odor O' Sultans of the website!
She debases the other humble DJ's and gives no quarter to those weaker among us. She aims to assist in self-destruction instead of self-improvement. None have been able to tell from which dark depths of hell from whence this banshee came, though all wish her to be expelled there once more. I leave her to your mighty hands oh Caesars of the forum.
In humble odedience...
-CyranoDeBergerac
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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dead_romeo

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I doubt Allen will ban her, unless she's seriuosly out of line, Cyrano, but I agree, about Mallory Bollox, way too negative.

Ever notice how every few weeks, or days, a harpie-biatch comes swooping in to sosuave.com full of indignant rage at men trying to better themselves, flapping her leathery wings and shrieking a peircing, shrilly cry of outrage, defecating verbal acid on anyone and everyone, desperate to sink her talons into any mans' skull that dares to speak/uncover the truths & myths about women?

Bound to happen, and will continue no doubt.

It's cool, gotta have a few nasties around to really appreciate the great posters here, right?


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"Conclusions arrived at through reasoning have very little or no influence in altering the course of our lives. Hence, the countless examples of people who have the clearest convictions and yet act diametrically against them time and time again; and have as the only explanation for their behavior the idea that to err is human." Carlos Castaneda - The Fire From Within

"It is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong" - Harlan Ellison
 

dead_romeo

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haha

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"Conclusions arrived at through reasoning have very little or no influence in altering the course of our lives. Hence, the countless examples of people who have the clearest convictions and yet act diametrically against them time and time again; and have as the only explanation for their behavior the idea that to err is human." Carlos Castaneda - The Fire From Within

"It is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong" - Harlan Ellison

[This message has been edited by dead_romeo (edited 07-23-2002).]
 

CyranoDeBergerac

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A young Ram will be sacrificed unto you in tribute of your wise and glorious deeds, oh, magnificent moderators of sosuave. And as for dead_romeo, I doth my cap to you and the muses who inspired your more than appropriate description of said Harpie. Many blessings upon you all.

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"If we are to change the world we must start with that one corner of it over which we excercise full influence...ourselves."

Of mice and men...which are you?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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