Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

HB 7 date lasted 2 hours, went well tonight. Was I friend zoned?

biggoal

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Just had an HB8, 41 years old message me on facebook dating app. The thing is I liked her profile and left a comment on her photo again so she liked me back and messaged me saying thanks.

She said she liked what she read on my profile and said I look handsome.

Anyway, she's a paralegal, has a kid. She married when she was 20, high school sweatheart she said but then got divorced 4 years ago and so she has very little dating experience.

The downside is she's 90 miles away but I liked her anyway when I was browsing because she looked hot. I doubt I get a date because of the distance, BUT she read my profile so she must know I live an hour and a half away. Is the handsome comment mean she has some attraction?

So shoudl I ask if she wants to meet half way for a drink? When women comment about looks like that does it mean I might be able to fvk her pretty quickly?
 

biggoal

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So I said I had to head out for a bit and if I could get her number so we can text later rather than using the facebook app. Anyway she gave me it! I did a reverse lookup and it's really her, so no fake profile. I looked her up on facebook just now. She's a solid 7.5 to 8 MILF.

Again, she lives over 80 miles away, in Hillsbourough County but liked what I said about her profile pic and said I'm handsome and she's really talkative and flirty.

How should I go about setting up a first meeting? Meet half way? She also has Epcot season passes too which is a big plus and is a paralegal and looks educated, no druggie.

What is it lately with women 39-43 talking to me suddenly? I they looking for a younger guy for "fun" or something? Just trying to figure it out because usually women, especially older ones like a guy at min their age or a few years older.
 

biggoal

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So that rich hb8 milf o mentioned last night, I messaged her today and asked if she wants to get coffee. Shwa taking care of an estate stuff up north and wont be back until dec. Shes rich based on her pics. She said though we can keep in contact until she gets back in town. The profile doesn't seem fake.

So how do you ds deal with rich girls who have more money? Do you treat them any different or kiss their arses? Why is it I run into high end, rich hbs on old? Can't they find guys thru friends and social circles?
 

Suave88

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So I said I had to head out for a bit and if I could get her number so we can text later rather than using the facebook app. Anyway she gave me it! I did a reverse lookup and it's really her, so no fake profile. I looked her up on facebook just now. She's a solid 7.5 to 8 MILF.

Again, she lives over 80 miles away, in Hillsbourough County but liked what I said about her profile pic and said I'm handsome and she's really talkative and flirty.

How should I go about setting up a first meeting? Meet half way? She also has Epcot season passes too which is a big plus and is a paralegal and looks educated, no druggie.

What is it lately with women 39-43 talking to me suddenly? I they looking for a younger guy for "fun" or something? Just trying to figure it out because usually women, especially older ones like a guy at min their age or a few years older.
Dreaming is ok. Whatever you do, don't fvcking text the former trooper.
 

biggoal

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This girl up near Tampa we texted about 2 hours tonight. She had to put her kids to bed but wants to continue it tomorrow.

So I guess tomorrow I will ask her if she wants to meet up. So the thing is since of the distance thing would it be good to offer to meet her up there or offer half way meeting point and have coffee or a drink? I mean it's OLD so I don't want to get burned on the gas money and paying for a meal that ends in a dead end.

What would be the best compromise to use you think? She seems interested though and I've passed the tests so far. She also isn't into hook up culture and such she said as well. Very mature sounding and had a long term marriage as well.

When it's someone 90 miles away what is the best idea for a first date?
 

biggoal

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The former trooper I talked to briefly this morning. She's been getting ready for her trip and leaving today but wants to meet up again still.

I also talked to that milf up by Tampa briefly this morning. She's working but said she wants to chat again tonight. I work tonight but I'm still able to chat. I think I'll be able to get her on a date. She thinks I'm handsome right off the bat she said. The thing is distance will have to meet half way. The thing is I want to meet for a quick drink but if she's driving 40,50 miles to meet me if we hit it off I certainly want something we can do where we can spend a couple hours together and talk more since it's such a long drive.

Also that other MILF closer to me who's really introverted is out of town for awhile but says to keep in touch. She's really wealthy it looks like. Divorced though but almost a solid 9.

I'm going to focus on the one MILF from Tampa for right now and won't talk to the trooper much since she's out of town anyway.
 

Suave88

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The former trooper I talked to briefly this morning. She's been getting ready for her trip and leaving today but wants to meet up again still.

I also talked to that milf up by Tampa briefly this morning. She's working but said she wants to chat again tonight. I work tonight but I'm still able to chat. I think I'll be able to get her on a date. She thinks I'm handsome right off the bat she said. The thing is distance will have to meet half way. The thing is I want to meet for a quick drink but if she's driving 40,50 miles to meet me if we hit it off I certainly want something we can do where we can spend a couple hours together and talk more since it's such a long drive.

Also that other MILF closer to me who's really introverted is out of town for awhile but says to keep in touch. She's really wealthy it looks like. Divorced though but almost a solid 9.

I'm going to focus on the one MILF from Tampa for right now and won't talk to the trooper much since she's out of town anyway.
You got to start prooving to us your luck with your girls. Some members believe you are acting. I need proof.
 
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biggoal

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So we talked again tonight, that chick up in Tampa, over 90 miles away. She was blowing up my phone again while at work tonight! Anyway I asked her out and she said yes she wants to meet up! Anyway since the distance thing I suggested we meet half way for a drink on the weekend one afternoon and then see how it goes. She wasn't big on this saying she will have to find someone to watch her 11 and 13 year old because she doesn't leave them home alone that long and doesn't like going that far away. So I counter and said for the first date I will drive up to her and to plan something out for a day since it's a NINETY mile drive for me to her. We will see if she replies but she didn't seem too fond of meeting half way.

She's an hb7. Pretty girl but no HB9. Is this asking for trouble? Driving 90 miles for a first date from OLD and she complains about her kids? She's an educated lady, not some white trash and has a decent job but she's doing that whole thing single women do putting kids first.

Isn't that fair enough asking to meet half way? I mean, actually it is slightly closer to her than me still.

Then the other issue with OLD dates is flakes and no shows. I would really be mad driving 90 miles and she no shows and I spend about $20 in gas and wear on my car driving an hour and a half almost.

Was I being unreasonable asking her to meet me half way?
 

corrector

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Then the other issue with OLD dates is flakes and no shows. I would really be mad driving 90 miles and she no shows and I spend about $20 in gas and wear on my car driving an hour and a half almost.

Was I being unreasonable asking her to meet me half way?
Yes you were being unreasonable because you are being cheap again. You complain about paying $ 60.00 on a dinner date, and now you are saving $ 40.00 and only paying $ 20.00 for gas and wear and tear, and instead of seeing the glass as half empty (i.e. you are spending less money than the average dinner date), you see it as half-full (i.e. you are spending $ 20.00). You must think positive and always see the glass as half-empty and pay the $ 20.00 for gas and wear on your car. You blew up the momentum of this over $ 10.00 (ie. half-way is
$ 10.00 or half of $ 20.00). You killing this over $ 10.00 which very, very stupid. Think of all the time, mental energy, advice on this board, and emotional investment thrown all away for $ 10.00. For $ 10.00 if she was thinking of something with you, you messed up the mood. So, if $ 10.00 is worth more to you than having a successful date with a woman then you need therapy. Shame on you for suggesting to meet halfway. What type of an AFC-beta male are you? You have to consistent with your game. You want to be that blue-pill AFC guy and she loves you for that, you can't start showing backbone or boundaries now because it kills the effect and lose your chance of getting a pity-lay from her.

Now, you have to ask yourself why would you be mad if there is a no-show. Low status males get mad because they have no options, or in your case, very few. If you had allot of girls to pick and choose from then you wouldn't be upset about driving 90 miles to go after a woman that has been giving you allot of red-flags.
 

biggoal

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Yes you were being unreasonable because you are being cheap again. You complain about paying $ 60.00 on a dinner date, and now you are saving $ 40.00 and only paying $ 20.00 for gas and wear and tear, and instead of seeing the glass as half empty (i.e. you are spending less money than the average dinner date), you see it as half-full (i.e. you are spending $ 20.00). You must think positive and always see the glass as half-empty and pay the $ 20.00 for gas and wear on your car. You blew up the momentum of this over $ 10.00 (ie. half-way is
$ 10.00 or half of $ 20.00). You killing this over $ 10.00 which very, very stupid. Think of all the time, mental energy, advice on this board, and emotional investment thrown all away for $ 10.00. For $ 10.00 if she was thinking of something with you, you messed up the mood. So, if $ 10.00 is worth more to you than having a successful date with a woman then you need therapy. Shame on you for suggesting to meet halfway. What type of an AFC-beta male are you? You have to consistent with your game. You want to be that blue-pill AFC guy and she loves you for that, you can't start showing backbone or boundaries now because it kills the effect and lose your chance of getting a pity-lay from her.

Now, you have to ask yourself why would you be mad if there is a no-show. Low status males get mad because they have no options, or in your case, very few. If you had allot of girls to pick and choose from then you wouldn't be upset about driving 90 miles to go after a woman that has been giving you allot of red-flags.
There isn't a lot of options on OLD within a 60 mile radius around here.
 

biggoal

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You sound too desperate so you need to find more options.
Like I said in this area it's freaking mostly old people. When you see people my age they're usually married.

I did come across a local singles group on facebook and they also have a website too where they list their events. So I looked at the event photos and it's the same people at each event. Most of them were over 45, most were awkward looking slobs for men, only a few women but only one was attractive, others were fat or old and looked like trash. It looks like it's only a group of about 20 singles and bottom of the barrel. Like me for example would stick out like a sore thumb in it. heck, I'd be embarrassed going into a public place hanging around them if I did see a single woman alone.

Some also suggest Asian women if I can't find decent women in the area. I'm not racist and I find Japanese and Korean women to be very attractive looking. I would go out with one and have no problem with it. I mean, many of them are in better shape than American women anyway because they eat better. Problem is I hardly EVER see Asian women in this area of FL. I see some short Chinese ones who run Chinese restaurants, nail salons, but regular Asian women like what is described on here don't exist. I see more of them in Tampa and Miami though. Like in St. Louis where I'm from we had more hot Asian women as I described. OLD Asian women are literally non existent for miles and as I said I hardly have ever seen one in public in this region of FL.

What about those stupid Match.com events? I hear they're a train wreck and corny stuff like bowling. On another forum a guy went to it and said only 8 people showed up. 5 men and 3 women. The men were low end, nerdy and didn't talk a lot and the two women were ugly. He said there was a hot Asian chick though but was very shy and sat and kept to herself yet he didn't talk to her a lot. How stupid. I'm thinking to myself a shy hot Asian, no one paying attention to her and she's shy and not talking. I would be all over that.
 

Atom Smasher

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That long response that you quoted a few posts back was a mistake. It showed her you were too invested; too available and forthcoming.

You should save that deeper stuff for later. At first you want to keep it light and fun, with just a sprinkling of seriousness here and there. Your responses should be relatively short. You’re giving yourself away with long, invested messages.

With the Tampa lady, she’s setting the rules and requiring you to drive all the way up there even though you don’t know each other yet. Not good.

That would be a deal breaker for me. Not worth it. If she can’t break away from her kids, then how would you two possibly work out a schedule? Driving 90 minutes up and back each time you meet is going to get old real fast.
 

biggoal

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That long response that you quoted a few posts back was a mistake. It showed her you were too invested; too available and forthcoming.

You should save that deeper stuff for later. At first you want to keep it light and fun, with just a sprinkling of seriousness here and there. Your responses should be relatively short. You’re giving yourself away with long, invested messages.

With the Tampa lady, she’s setting the rules and requiring you to drive all the way up there even though you don’t know each other yet. Not good.

That would be a deal breaker for me. Not worth it. If she can’t break away from her kids, then how would you two possibly work out a schedule? Driving 90 minutes up and back each time you meet is going to get old real fast.
She lives in a large metro area. Why would she show interest in a guy 90 miles away with all the men up there. It's not like she lives down here where it's the old demographic. There are all kinds of singles there.

Is this a red flag too? She's real. Everything checks out she's not a fake. Again, red flags. Is it possible she's having a lot of trouble finding guys because she's so controlling and only has weekends free? Why else would a girl even look 90 miles away if she lives in a large city?

I read that on here from time to time women who set rules, put their kids first, demand requirements. Is that too much to demand on someone before a first date? From the sounds of it, weekends are the only time she's free and that's if it's a short date, or she finds a baby sitter since they're 11 and 13 and can't stay home alone for long period of time.

The dad only gets the kids every other weekend.

Oh and she was married for 15 years. She said the divorce was mutual. What does that mean married for 15 years and the woman claims that? Do you think she was too controlling and the man said F it and walked out?
 

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You spend too much time speculating and second-guessing. It tends to make you spin your wheels.

The only way to gain discernment as to what is really going on with women is to act and find our through experience. Speculation can only go so far.

If it's not a big deal to you, then go ahead and drive up. This is your time for figuring this stuff out. As you know, none of this is life or death. I would consider it a game and a learning process.

Advice here on SoSuave can only serve you to a degree too. There's way too much speculation going on, to a degree where it's not serving you. Can you make a date with her to meet halfway on a weekend where the dad has the kids?

If she is not willing to meet halfway, I would consider that the "female entitlement syndrome" and wouldn't want to meet her, but you might not mind driving way up there.

At any rate, I would avoid dinner dates. They are the worst way to meet women. I would find a daytime activity and do that. It's low pressure and it is different from the same old dates she's always gone on while not married.
 
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