"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Guy to pay for second date?

Atldude

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hey is it bad form if the bill comes and the waiter asks who should pay and she offers... to let her pay... cause apparently i got dinged because of that... there were 4 of us altogether.. and i already made the effort to fly over to see her... i did do the asking out though... lol..

thanks
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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typical

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Atldude said:
hey is it bad form if the bill comes and the waiter asks who should pay and she offers... to let her pay... cause apparently i got dinged because of that... there were 4 of us altogether.. and i already made the effort to fly over to see her... i did do the asking out though... lol..

thanks
Okay screw the bill but you flew over to see a chick ??? You wasted hard earned cash to go see tits and a$$ for a date, cant you find a chick in your own city ?

I just find that stupid actually and also the last time I had a "date" was around 2 years ago cause the whole go eat and talk crap bores the sh!t out of me.
 

Trader

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Always pay for the date/dinner - NO exceptions

But remember this - you should always be the one asking her out AND planning the date anyways

So you should never be shocked by the cost of the dinner since you obviously already took that into account when you chose the place

Remember the words of the legendary poster Pook - the girl is in YOUR world now - and chosing the restaurant and paying for it solidifes that

NOTE - you don't have to take her to an expensive restaurant - your goal is not to please her, but to please YOURSELF and have fun. I've done cheap, simple dates that ended up with simple dinners (~ $20 at a Thai restaurant) - but I've also planned dates that were a bit more 'upscale' - where I dropped $150 - try Hot Chocolate in Chicago

Open question to all - do you actually like it when a girl offers to pay?

I actually hate it when a girl offers to pay.

The girls I like and take out are always the hyper-feminine, super passive, dependent spoiled types - they just expect you to pay.
 

Rhoto

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Eh, it depends on the situation.

If she offers to pay, I don't see a problem. But don't think buying dinner is going to get her into the sack.

She made that decision long before you two met up.

Trader, you sound like you need some Leykis. $150? Are you nuts?
 

rushing dude 123

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Hm well u asked her out so yeh u pay for date, but if she says no and offers to pay it herself let her. With any girl i have dated i wud usually pay first even if they offered then next time she usually buys me something or pays for something and i accept then a continuous cycle of that again and again. If my date was to always make me pay i wud ditch them, but thats just me. Go to pay and watch what she does and decide on ur own what actions to take.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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From a cultural standpoint, society assumes that the man will pay for at least the first couple dates.

While that trend has changed slightly over the past couple decades (women lib, etc) - many still hold the opinion that the guy needs to grab the check.

It appears that your date was one of the ones whom felt that it was your responsibility.

Good Luck,
Relationship-Buddy
 

Trader

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Rhoto said:
Eh, it depends on the situation.

If she offers to pay, I don't see a problem. But don't think buying dinner is going to get her into the sack.

She made that decision long before you two met up.

Trader, you sound like you need some Leykis. $150? Are you nuts?
Ha - I agree that taking her out for an expensive dinner does nothing to help you have sex with her.

But sex is not my goal. My goal is to have fun. Sometimes I just want to take my girl to a high class place and relax.

But if the girl started to demand that I take her to a high class restaurant - I would NEXT her in a heartbeat. I call the shots - I decide whether the date is simple, or a bit more up-scale.

BTW - Leykis is the man
 
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