"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Got the number of girl, but call and "I have a boyfriend"?

supCALI

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Sup guys, first post here. Just want to see that I love this place and the DJ bible. Great stuff, it's helped me a lot.

So I'm in college and there's this chick I was digging, maybe... a HB7.5 or 8? Anyway, she was pretty cute, so I asked for her number and she gave it to me, easy as pie. Friday, I call her up. I say straight up that I'm calling to ask her out on a date. Then...

"Ooh... I have a boyfriend. I'm sorry."
Me: "It's okay. Peace."

and then I hung up.

Now, I'm glad I did this, and I'm not hung up on it. I view it as a learning experience, more time in the field improving. But to get even more out of this, I wanted to know if there was an answer to why she gave me her number if she had a boyfriend? That just doesn't click with me.

Thanks guys.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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thewickedm

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Hmm, in general college is a social place. And in where I come from, people exchange numbers freely in school. I'm guessing you put her on the guard by telling her too directly that you are taking her out on a date, triggering some unknown mechanism in her brain that causes her to mention her boyfriend, whether or not he actually exists.
 

supCALI

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*shrug*

I wasn't about to beat around the bush. You may be right though. In this case, this is a community college. Which, unlike the name, isn't as social a place as a university. Girls understand that if you ask for their number, you're asking for dating reasons.
 

zekko

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where I come from, people exchange numbers freely
Yeah, especially in this day and age, with texting, facebook, etc. people give out there numbers for all sorts of reasons. Your girl may have just been being friendly, or social. or just wanting some attention.

I agree with thewickedm in that you were too upfront about asking for a date. You might have had better luck just asking her to tag along to do something, make it more casual. You put the "date" expectancy on there and there's too much pressure or it makes her unfaithful to her boyfriend. Should have just tried to keep it casual and then escalate from there.
 

supCALI

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zekko said:
Yeah, especially in this day and age, with texting, facebook, etc. people give out there numbers for all sorts of reasons. Your girl may have just been being friendly, or social. or just wanting some attention.

I agree with thewickedm in that you were too upfront about asking for a date. You might have had better luck just asking her to tag along to do something, make it more casual. You put the "date" expectancy on there and there's too much pressure or it makes her unfaithful to her boyfriend. Should have just tried to keep it casual and then escalate from there.
Damn. **** this guy then. LOL

So, should I just next it then? I mean, she is pretty cute. She's just a girl though. Or should I wait and reapproach?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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supCALI

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So, should I just next it? I mean, she's pretty cute. What do you guys say?

And next time I'm asking a girl out, how should I phrase it? "Yo, let's hang out"?
 

Iceberg

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supCALI said:
And next time I'm asking a girl out, how should I phrase it? "Yo, let's hang out"?
"Let's grab a drink on Wednesday. I know a place you'll like."

Anything besides "Let's go on a date!!" It just sounds so serious and pressure-filled.
 

supCALI

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Yeah, that makes sense. I'll do that next time, thanks.

So is this game over for me with this HB or do I have another shot at that ass?
 

DanelMadr

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Once I was in McDonalds. My car key broke so I had to spend some time there, waiting for my brother with spare set of keys. meanwhile SWAT arrived arresting some gangsters in a parking lot across the street. No kidding.
I'm at my best mood/game when shyt hits the fan. And there was this extremely cute girl behind counter. Well, we talked and she was sending buying signals like fakking jumbo jet...curling her hair and shyt.... I was in a hurry and since I wasn't exactly Dj back then... I didn't escalate or asked for a number.

But my brother told me "Man she was just having orgasm talking with you." So I said fakk it, I'm going back. I did. Took her number. And some days later I texted her to go out with me in town to see a fireworks.

Well, the answer was "At this number there is none of that name, dude. You have the wrong number."

So either she gave me false number, flaked or her bf took the message. Bummer.:D

Just funny story to cheer you up.

My advice...don't mention the word "date" next time. And if she asks if it is a date (shyt test alarm), tell her "Absolutely not. I don't even know you, woman."

If she mentions bf, pretend that you misheard bf for herpes and ask her "Is it contagious?"
 

supCALI

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LoL @ those lines.

But yeah, like I said guys, this is a hot piece of ass. Should I just next it? Or can I more or less rebound?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

supCALI

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Nice write up man.

I like this idea of "confident persistence" as opposed to "AFC desperation" (both I believe are separate).

In a "confident persistence" sort of way, how do you guys think I can continue this and end up bedding this chick?

Details of note: I see her Tuesdays and Thursdays in a class of mine. Talked, similar political interests and such.
 

thewickedm

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To be brutally honest bro, you're placing too much importance on this chick, judging from the number of times you asked us whether you still have a shot at tapping that behind;) the only way you're gonna spike some interest in her is to game some other women and work on yourself, eventually she may or may not come to realise how much she is missing out on. That being said, if she does not realise it, she probably didn't give a hoot abt u to start with and you just saved yourself a whole lot of self doubt and heartache:) just my two cents worth!

A dj always has a chance at that behind, just as long as he kills that desperation to do so and not bungle things up more:) peace.
 

supCALI

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Aight, it's all good man. Just saying though, it's some nice tail. LoL. What you said is what I planned to do anyway. But if there was a straight up, no nonsense way to get at that ass, I sure would do it.

Any input welcome.
 

Ease

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This is where texting has an advantage. Its informal and easy.

Tell the guys that say texting is always bad to smoke a ****.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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zekko

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Tell the guys that say texting is always bad to smoke a ****.
Meanwhile, the guy who IS texting her casually ends up stealing his girlfriend.
 
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