"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Got the girl. Hit a snag.

Oswald

New Member
Joined
Aug 9, 2004
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
Hey fellas,

I've been a reader of these boards for almost a 1.5 years. Fantastic stuff.
I've never had much problem attracting the ladies, thanks to the fact that I have two smooth older brothers who pretty much showed me the ropes. However, I have rather little experience when it comes to LTRs.

Here's the background info. I'm 18, met an 18-year-old chick about three months ago. She's very inexperienced -- only ever kissed a guy before me, so I had to take it slow. We've been serious for about two months now and I think this one is a keeper for now. I know she's very into me, because she's conservative but we've already had sex. Plus, she says she loves me.

Ok, now part of the reason why she was a tough catch was because she was still hurting over a past crush. Some guy who she was into for a long time and who she kissed a few times (he sounds like a cool cat but an AFC to the bone) broke her heart about five months ago. They cut off contact. Cold turkey.

Well, about the time we started dating, he starts contacting her again, over IM and phone and they actually were very close friends for a long time, so they get to chatting again, etc. I figure she's with me so nothing to worry about.

Now, a few days ago she tells me on the phone (I'm away from home now so we're doing "long distance" for three weeks -- no biggie) that her ex, Peter, told her he wants to meet up with her before he leaves for school. Being a girl, she totally doesn't see that he's probably trying to get his foot in the door again, and she thinks that since they were such good friends and now on talking terms again, she wants to hang out with him a little before he moves away.

When she told me this, I totally kept my cool, told her to go ahead and have fun. I figured that I would look weak if I overreacted. From past conversations she knows I have zero tolerance for cheating and she told me right after "you have nothing to worry about." Of course, I told her I knew I have nothing to worry about and cut off the conversation on a high note.

My question to you all: Should I just forget about it and not even inquire if they met up? Should I be worried? I feel like since I'm gone, there really isn't anything I can do. What are your thoughts? Does this one seem like a lost cause?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

JohnJones

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2002
Messages
582
Reaction score
1
Location
PA
Maybe you should do a search for posts like lunch with the ex or that kind of thing. There's a lot of collective wisdom in those.
 

Oswald

New Member
Joined
Aug 9, 2004
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by JohnJones
Maybe you should do a search for posts like lunch with the ex or that kind of thing. There's a lot of collective wisdom in those.
I actually did a search on this topic before posting, since i know how annoying FAQs are from newbies. Couldn't find anything though. Still would like to hear your opinions.
 

Oswald

New Member
Joined
Aug 9, 2004
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
I figured that's all I could do, but it's still not a fun feeling. Part of me wishes she had kept her mouth shut and hadn't told me. Argh. Random hookups are so much easier on the mind. You finally find a good fish and the worry begins.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

check_mate_kid_uk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2004
Messages
2,077
Reaction score
4
Location
UK
well photo 1 i totaly aggree i was about to say the same thing but realised you beat me to it. Oswald you have nothing to wory about because what ever her ex wants to meet her for, if shes not intrested then nothings gona happen. The fact she told you means shes not intending to cheat on you, she sees it as no big deal, you have notihng to wory aobut, if she was gona cheat she wudnt have told you, im positive about this. Anotherthing is that girls (and guys) dnt necciserly want to got out agian with an ex, as i read in the bible today "the pool has already been pissed in" i think everytinhg is perfectly safe.

hope ive been a help
 

Oswald

New Member
Joined
Aug 9, 2004
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
Thanks for the pep talk guys.

I'm positive she has no intention now of cheating, or else she wouldn't have told me about meeting with the ex, as you said CheckMateKid. However, my concern was that she would experience a rush of all those old feelings after spending some time with this guy. Well, I'll just wait it out like you all said. Thanks for the help.
 
Top