Got rejected by HB10..how to overcome irrational fear i will never come across another HB10 or better women?

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

You sound desperate, work isn't the place or time for this

 

[Gamisch]

I don't see anything wrong with asking out co-workers. Workplace is the high-school/college equivalent for adults.

You're putting this girl on a pedestal, that's your problem (count the times you used amazing, awesome in OP referring to her). She may be physically attractive (just like plenty other girls), but you don't know her enough so don't assume she's a once in a lifetime opportunity that just got away from you.

1.perfect
2.HB10
3.long legs,
4. great body,
5.classy,
6.well read,
7.head turner
8.looks

9. intelligent
10. and attractive


11. most attractive woman
11.5(Pathetic scarcity mindset)..what if i never
12.attractive
13. and awesome


13.5(Pathetic scarcity mindset)I'll never 14.amazing
15.HB10

Give it 10 years. The most attractive women I have known.... looks fade... every "most attractive" woman I have known is always replaced by a younger more attractive woman sooner or later. The personality is all that remains. Also, after you know a girl, she becomes more human and at least for me, one can start to see the flaws. Infatuation hides flaws

This..yesterday I say this brunette who was always just a skinny teenager, but now, like magically, she became a big booty 20 something y.o that made me break my neck and I was like; " she'll either reject me or I'll kill her p00sy". On top of my hitlist of local girls outta NOWHERE.

How do you know she's an awesome girl? Just because she has a nice body and nice face? Men like your deserve to be rejected, until you change that attitude for real.

This.

OP is in for a world of pain if he keeps this mentality up. Great post, short but yet underrated and highly important for ALL men to understand!!

 

[All_Kindz_Of_Gainz]

This.

OP is in for a world of pain if he keeps this mentality up. Great post, short but yet underrated and highly important for ALL men to understand!!

I was OP at one point, we all were OP at one point, that's why I got what I deserved, getting rejected constantly, thinking she was great cause she was hot, allowing $hit cause she was hot. We men are really $tupid sometimes.

 

[zekko]

How do i get out of this mindset that I'll never meet another amazing HB10 again?

I don't believe in 10s, so if you go by that, yeah they're pretty rare. Why do you need a 10 anyway, wouldn't an 8 or 9 be good enough?

There is also the concept that once you consider a woman a 10, you've already failed.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

The biggest thing here for OP is not to beat himself up. She rejected him, but she was kind & polite in doing so. That exhibits class, true, but it’s still a rejection.

I always reject kindly and politely but I still decline unwanted interest.

OP has a couple of issues to work on.

1. If a girl declines, she is not interested. You never want to be that guy chasing after a girl who doesn’t fancy you. That is a waste of time. Once she declines you must move on.

2. Fantasizing about this girl, and worse expanding that to “Ill never see another ever again” is totally self defeating and reinforces a scarcity mindset and that hurts your vibe with everyone around you.

I like what @Bingo-Player said. Go to Ibizia. They will in fact be everywhere and you’ll have a better perspective.

As to the work thing for meeting women? Some cultures it’s very different than the west. I knew an Egyptian doctor who had immigrated to the US and he was very in love with his wife. I asked how he met her. She came to the ER in Cairo to bring her ailing mother & he was the doctor on call. He told me the same thing OP stated; Opportunities are scarce in my culture so I took my shot with my patient’s daughter. Obviously for him it worked out.

So be a bit more understanding about that guys. Not everyone here is in US, EU or AUS.

 

[MatureDJ]

How do i get out of this mindset that I'll never meet another amazing HB10 again?

Surely, you must
Procede in a wise,
Intelligent matter,
Never wasting a chance ...

Men must always
Overcome whatever difficulties
Rectifying any negative
Externalities ...

Perhaps, the answer
Lies within one's own grasping
At the opportunities
That present themselves, and not
Evading them for
Superfluous reasons ...

 

[Agamemnon43]

I'm almost in the same position except i haven't asked mine out yet. She is a top-tier gorgeous, magnetic face, very popular and guys drool after her. Also seems to be smart and well educated. I don't like 1-10 rating so i described her like this.

I see her once a week at these specific theater group gatherings where she hangs around with her group of friends, a few guys and a few girls usually. The first period was pretty hard because there was no opportunity to talk with her alone, I had to basically do a cold approach in front of her group. But I waited for an opportunity and it presented itself, where we finally met officially and she shook my hand extremely firmly, was receptive in the conversation and I took it as a green light. Now I'm waiting for the next meeting where I don't really have a plan but I'll do something, I just dont know what. Any advice? For the note I consider myself a very interesting and attractive guy with my own thing going on (business, motorbikes, gym fit etc.) backed up by my history of dating beautiful girls. However I can be very awkward in person and I don't talk a lot. Also I don't know how to handle rejection in person.

Currently what I'm doing is devalueing her in my head. I don't have a burning desire like OP but I have to shoot my shot before I start feeling like a *****. She is a good opportunity and I wanna see what's going on.

 

[DoofusDonutDude]

I'm almost in the same position except i haven't asked mine out yet. She is a top-tier gorgeous, magnetic face, very popular and guys drool after her. Also seems to be smart and well educated. I don't like 1-10 rating so i described her like this.

I see her once a week at these specific theater group gatherings where she hangs around with her group of friends, a few guys and a few girls usually. The first period was pretty hard because there was no opportunity to talk with her alone, I had to basically do a cold approach in front of her group. But I waited for an opportunity and it presented itself, where we finally met officially and she shook my hand extremely firmly, was receptive in the conversation and I took it as a green light. Now I'm waiting for the next meeting where I don't really have a plan but I'll do something, I just dont know what. Any advice? For the note I consider myself a very interesting and attractive guy with my own thing going on (business, motorbikes, gym fit etc.) backed up by my history of dating beautiful girls. However I can be very awkward in person and I don't talk a lot. Also I don't know how to handle rejection in person.

Currently what I'm doing is devalueing her in my head. I don't have a burning desire like OP but I have to shoot my shot before I start feeling like a *****. She is a good opportunity and I wanna see what's going on.

Ask her out and get it over with.

I mean, sure, there ARE instances where some of the guys who did punch above their weight in terms of their partner did it because they got to spend more time around the woman, able to display more of their better qualities which is not possible with cold approach..but i have no idea how would something like that work..it seems too much dependent on the woman and ..on circumstances? Could end in the friendzone..? Better to ask and move on if she rejects..

 

[obelisk]

Don't chase your losses. If she's not interested then she's not interested. There are 3.5+ billion women in the world. There are other 10s out there.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

How do i get out of this mindset that I'll never meet another amazing HB10 again?

A) you asked her out before you were well-calibrated. Work on your social skills.
B) you asked out a coworker. Don't defecate where you dine. I understand if you have no other options, but dating anyone at work is mostly a recipe for disaster. Avoid if possible.
C) there are many beautiful women on this earth, she's not a unicorn. Stop worshipping hotness.
D) would you date you? many guys are looking for supermodels, but supermodels will tend to date someone of equal or higher value. Are you there yet? My guess is not, because when you get to that value, you don't look up at gorgeous women and you sure as hell don't 'rate' them.

 

[Manure Spherian]

.what if i never come across some one as attractive and awesome again

If you never come across someone this attractive again, you will come across less attractive women. What would that do to your life?

Are you a ten?

Why do you consider this woman awesome?

 

[DoofusDonutDude]

A) you asked her out before you were well-calibrated. Work on your social skills.
B) you asked out a coworker. Don't defecate where you dine. I understand if you have no other options, but dating anyone at work is mostly a recipe for disaster. Avoid if possible.
C) there are many beautiful women on this earth, she's not a unicorn. Stop worshipping hotness.
D) would you date you? many guys are looking for supermodels, but supermodels will tend to date someone of equal or higher value. Are you there yet? My guess is not, because when you get to that value, you don't look up at gorgeous women and you sure as hell don't 'rate' them.

How do you get to that level then? Can you reach to that level if you're not someone who won the genetic lottery-- white, 6'4, born rich, handsome guy? I would like to believe so..? What would it take to get to that level, not necessarily to supermodel level but like the bombshells level?

I saw this totally average looking dude who is a shorter Asian billionaire who just got married to this taller stunner who was the former Miss.Ireland --

Miss Ireland Emma Waldron Marries Tech Guru At 'Favourite Place In The World'

Love is catching faster than the common cold as former Miss Ireland Emma Waldron has said 'I do' to her tech guru other half Andrew Chen.

evoke.ie

But being a billionaire takes time....which is fine, just its also a bit of the roll of dice..

 

[obelisk]

You could start by taking this woman off the pedestal. She is not as hot as you think she is. She's not perfect. She isn't an angel. You're simply infatuated with her currently and not able to discern what is real from the idealized angelic illusion in your own head.

Would a HB10 want to date you with how you're feeling and acting right now? This level of emotional reactivity and neediness shines through and can't be hidden. You can't negotiate attraction at the end of the day. Even if you did all the things discussed on this board, were a genetic chad and natural, it is highly likely that she simply wouldn't be attracted to you. Outcome independence and abundance are paramount and right now you have neither.

 

[DoofusDonutDude]

You could start by taking this woman off the pedestal. She is not as hot as you think she is. She's not perfect. She isn't an angel. You're simply infatuated with her currently and not able to discern what is real from the idealized angelic illusion in your own head.

Would a HB10 want to date you with how you're feeling and acting right now? This level of emotional reactivity and neediness shines through and can't be hidden. You can't negotiate attraction at the end of the day. Even if you did all the things discussed on this board, were a genetic chad and natural, it is highly likely that she simply wouldn't be attracted to you. Outcome independence and abundance are paramount and right now you have neither.

Yeah, i know...its weird, I didn't have these oneitis like symptoms before but got them after rejection..
Your're right, I have a LOT of work to do before i become a Don Juan...