"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Got Number from a 23 yo counter girl.....

dustmuffin

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I have been flirting wwith this girl for a while. Finally asked for the number.She gave me hers and I gave her mine, We are going to eat lunch at the highway patrol cafeteria. I think this will end well.Very proud of my self.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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marmel75

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Nice job on the number, but why would you c0ck block yourself by setting up a date where there is little to no chance of escalating with her?

Counter productive, IMO.
 

NSX-R

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I agree with @marmel75 except if you want to build up some more trust from her to you. Still it's tricky but everything depends on what you want to do with the chick.
 

dustmuffin

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I asked her out for new years....haven't heard back will do the lunch thing too. My brain is in a fog .
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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dustmuffin

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Nice job on the number, but why would you c0ck block yourself by setting up a date where there is little to no chance of escalating with her?

Counter productive, IMO.
 

marmel75

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I asked her out for new years....haven't heard back will do the lunch thing too. My brain is in a fog .
So you are trying to go out twice within a few days of each other? No bueno...makes you look optionless, especially since you just met this chick.

And New Years would not be the time to try and get a girl out for the first time...that's just begging for a flake.
 

dustmuffin

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Well if it works out it will. Live and learn.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Desdinova

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why? honest question, is it a special coupley thing or something?
It reeks of desperation to have somebody to bring in the new year with. If she asks, then you say, "Why? Would you like to join me?" This tells her that you have a life, you have plans, and she hasn't earned any priority in your life yet. Other than that, each of you should stick to your individual plans. You should at least put your d1ck inside her before you invite her for any kind of holiday celebrations.
 

CuddleJunkie

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It reeks of desperation to have somebody to bring in the new year with. If she asks, then you say, "Why? Would you like to join me?" This tells her that you have a life, you have plans, and she hasn't earned any priority in your life yet. Other than that, each of you should stick to your individual plans. You should at least put your d1ck inside her before you invite her for any kind of holiday celebrations.
Yeah, I understand. I ask because here in Spain it's more of a family thing, so I wanted to understand what it was like over there.
 
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