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Got a Hottie's number at networking event - Follow up Coverage :)

sazc

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omg.... So the reason I haven't updated is because I've gone through stressful hell because of this girl.... I couldn't even bring myself to post about what transpired because I felt it would affect my whole mental well being just typing it out.... Now that a lot of time has passed I am going to try and post some sort of update/recap...

Here is the potential irony.... this girl was very attractive, super into me, super sexual.... and basically aimed to please. Really everything I looked for in a side piece

and I let her go....

So I was at her place in her bed and we got to talking. I asked her point blank about STDs... and she told me she only had HPV... I then told her about my friend who picked up Herpes and she didn't say a thing only that she had HPV which cured itself... I had asked her about this in the past and she said she never had an outbreak and the only thing she had was HPV... She told me she currently took an STD test a week ago and was waiting for the results.... All I had to do was wait like another day but I didn't....

So anyway we are in her bed, she is hot... we start hooking up... She seems apprehensive about having me finger her as usual.. She was wearing a pad and said it was because she had some kind of bump or scab she gets when she shaves... I didn't think anything of it at the time Then she starts giving me head like usual... I wanted to bang her... so I told her.. she went and she got condoms... and I banged her hard! I ended up pulling out with the condom on as I was cumming I pull out.. So afterwards go to her bathroom, take off my rubber, wash around my penis with soap and go back into her bed and lay there with her...

Then literally out of nowhere she says this..

"oh the doctor also told me that I had been exposed to herpes"

I couldn't believe my ears.... It was almost surreal.... After the reality of what she said sunk in I became indignant and flat out told her
"Why would you tell me this after had sex!?!?!?!!??!"

She starts going on about how she doesn't have herpes but was only exposed to it.... Long story a little shorter I end up telling her I had to leave to think about everything.... When I get home she starts texting me that she didn't realize that having been exposed to herpes means that you have herpes... She said now wasn't sure about the bump she had on her vagina as she originally told me it was just something she got after she shaved and when she saw her gyno she didn't think it was herpes... I was so sick... In my mind she knew she had herpes all along and rationalized it... not caring if she passed it... I asked her about her ex boyfriend and she said he claimed to have bumps one time or something... Basically every thing I asked this girl made me feel worse.

Anyway after being mentally sick for a few days, she texts me saying she got her results and she was negative for both Type 1 and Type 2 Herpes. She offered to show me the results as well... She said she went back to her original gyno who gave her the test 3 years ago and said she tested positive for Herpes Type 1 but not Type 2.... So I told her that herpes is for life... how could she possibly test negative for it now? She said she asked the doctor the same thing and she said sometimes God performs miracles... I told her that was weird as most doctors are more scientific than religious... but whatever...

Anyway she kept texting me saying she wnated to see me and that we should abstain from sex, as she had been with 2 guys inside of 12 weeks so its possible they could have given her something.... I was just so disgusted with this whole thing that I told her I couldn't see her anymore. I know I just typed a lot fast so if anyone has any questions just let me know.

On a different note, I went back to another networking event yesterday and ended up number closing an Italian girl. I texted her right after which she responded... I later texted that we should meet up and teach other our native langues with a smiley and didn't hear back.... The difference here was that I asked to meet up via text without talking first.... I might call tomorrow and if not then nexxxxxt.
Okay so THANK GOD you washed with soap after you fvked her. God does not cure herpes. Hopefully she is fvking with you. I cant believe her dr has given her all this info.

The 'good' news is that you'll know soon if you have it because you will break out. Try to stay calm. HSV is not the end of your life. My ex had it, was on the ani virals, and I never got it.

Edit: as funny as it sounds, if you have it, your finger will be the first to break out.
 
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Reyaj

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Yeah I mean the fact she gets around just put everything in perspective for me. Just all the mental torture I put myself through put a bad taste in my mouth regarding her. On Thursday I just met another girl off POF.. pretty cute and she basically gave me a hand job in her car and even paid for the bill.. She thinks I have money but whatever... Not sure if I should see her again or not.. My whole mind is complete flux regarding women and what my goal should be :(

The other european girl I met at the network event last Monday has been very coy... Usually this isn't a good sign.. She is very attractive though and intelligent as per her degree. However she is also like 22 which is like a 16 year age difference from me... This would be the record of age difference if I can hook up with her but things aren't looking promising right now. Just to give a recap of what transpired since I met her..

I got her number, and texted her not long after telling her it was nice to meet her. She responded back over an hour later saying it was nice meeting her too. I texted her something in her native language which meant "what are you up to" or something like that. She responded back saying she just got home and was getting ready for bed, and asked what I was doing... I responded like a half hour later saying I just got home too, just stopped for some food and that we should meet up soon and practice each other's native language and Yes I used a damn smiley face f#&@*#& shoot me ok! So anyway no response from her after that..

Until 2 days later where to my surprise she texts me:

hi sorry for the late response, what did you think of the election? and can we communicate some other way, I have a limited amount of text messages..

I respond back after a little time and we decide to use this common instant messaging protocol.. after some small talk where sometimes she responds back in under 15 mins and others hours later... So on Thursday I say we should meet up and ask her when she is free... She says how about tomorrow (which was Friday) for happy hour or Sunday... I tell her I'm working during happy hour and that I could meet up with her after. She responds back that she won't be free at that time but would let me know (red flag)

So I'm obviously not going to wait for her to tell me whether she is free or not sometime on Friday so I just respond back after a little while "no prob we'll just shoot for Sunday" - She responds back fairly quickly "that's a good idea!'

So no texts from me or her since until this morning when I texted her "hi (in her language) Do you still want to meet up later?"

No response and it's been over 4 hours!!!!!!!! I know she read the message too cause the program tells you that. I'm about to just text her "I'll take that as No :p Maybe some other time then, hope all is well"

What do you think? And if you're going to kill me for either using smiley faces or asking "Do you still want to meet up later" as if that killed it for me please don't bother me. I want people who actually get action in real life to weigh in.
 

sazc

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I'd let her reply and then not text her back, at all. she has low interest, why waste your time?
 

Reyaj

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I'd let her reply and then not text her back, at all. she has low interest, why waste your time?
This was what I was intending to do.. but I couldn't help it and I notice this is an issue I have when I'm really interested in a girl. I ended up texting her about 4 hours later

Me: I guess I'll take that as a no :p
18 minutes later
Her: Hi Reyaj! I'm really sorry about today! Some problems came up and I was very busy :( What if instead of going to the networking event tomorrow you and meet up instead?

So you have to understand my mindset here... at first I'm pissed she took so long to respond just to flake that is a waste of my time. But the fact that she offered to meet up with me the next day with me alone instead of with all the people at the event I took as a good sign. So I reply 20 minutes later
Me: No problem, I figured we were tenative anyway. I hope everything is ok on your end. We could meet tomorrow
18 minutes later
Her: Thank you!

The next day I texted her around noon
Me: Do you want to get drinks at xxxx xxxx? It's actually close to where we met
4 hours later!
Her: I'm not sure if I have to work tonight, but if I do I'd rather have ice cream :) I'll let you know asap

So I'm really tick off at this point. Not only does she wait 4 hours to respond, she basically counters with going for ice cream instead of drinking... So I don't respond right away and she doesn't either... Its even more rude because its already almost the time of the networking event and I don't hear anything...

So feeling indignant but trying to be calm I end up texting her over 2 hours later
Me: good thing I didn't hold my breath :p
5 minutes later
Her: I'm so sorry but the family I work for change plans every minute! (She takes care of their kids). They were supposed to be home for dinner, then they werent sure any more and they told me they aren't coming home. I'm kind of the most punctual people in this world but I can't do anything to avoid these situations. I'm really sorry
6 Minutes Later
Me: It's ok, I was thinking maybe it was just a culture thing ;)
1 minute later
Her: yes but an American one!
3 minutes later
Me: oh well can't say I didn't try

I then end up calling her but she quickly hits the ignore button.
3 minutes later I text
Me: I am meeting my friends for this xxxx event. If you want to talk on the phone later let me know, since meeting is such a mission.
35 minutes later
Her: I know I'm sorry but I'm still working. But next time you go to xxx event let me know! I love it! and I promise we'll be able to meet sooner or later!

So at this point I'm basically thinking either this girl isn't interested or is seeing someone or both... but I had been out with my friends drinking and while the conventional rules would say not to text again something inside me decided to defy it (as tends to happen when I drink)
So 2 and a half hours later
Me: The event was great, they talked about your country kind of Ironic :)

She texts me back the following day in the afternoon
Her: haha So when is the next event?
4 and a half hours later
Me: Monday, but with the holidays coming up I might see my family
2 hours later
Her: haha ok got it!

So again I know based on everything I've written here there is no reason to assume this girl is interested in me... but I have time from work coming up so I figured why not just take a shot
40 minutes later
Me: What are you doing Thursday?
7 minutes later
Her: I'm afraid I'm working but I will tell you that I am free Saturday and Sunday afternoon. This has been a busy week unfortunately

So I try a slick move trying to salvage some of the telegraphing of intereest
4 minutes later
Me: I meant for Thanksgiving sorry... Is your family doing anything?

Anyway in an effort to save time typing out every correspondence she basically goes on to say how her family might go out of state to see other family for the holiday and she ight go with the. She asks what my plans are and I tell her... S I then ask her this...

Me: Do you have a big family?
Over an hour later
Her: Sounds nice:) and you could practice my language ;) So you'll be ready for our next meeting...

She then starts typing a bit about her parents being only children and she has a sister and then interjects some corrections to some words I wrote in her native language... I tell her I didn't know that and ask call her out on using some British words versus American words. I ask her if she was taught British english being in Europe and she says she was and prefers American style and she can't always understand the Brits. I tell her that she speaks english amazingly well for not being a native speaker and she says "Thank you :) :)"

Her: I'm going to bed now let me know when you're free to learn some of my native plural, good night.
3 minutes later
Me: Definitely, I just hope you're patient with me :) Sleep well

So this was Tuesday... I don't message her at all Wednesday and neither does she.

So yesterday (Thursday) I message her a little before noon
Me: I'm going to be working from home tomorrow, are you around for happy hour?
over an hour alter
Her: I'm working all day long today :(
45 minutes later
Me: Me too, I said tomorrow :)
1 Minute later
Her: oh sorry you're right! Tomorrow I work till 7pm more or less
90 minutes later
Me: Cool, I should be done by then too. We could meet up
Over 4 hours later
Her: Yes!

So I didn't respond back after that... Today to my surprise I get a text from her
Her: Good morning Reyaj! So are we meeting tonight? Cause I have to inform my family
2 hours later
Me: Yes, you said you'd be done around 7pm right?
Under a minute later
Her: Yep, 7:30 the latest.
5 minutes later
Me: Cool. The weather should be decent today. Do you want to go to xxxx xxxxx? or do you have somewhere in mind?
12 minutes later
Her: What is that place? I have no ideas
40 minutes later
Me: It's a happy hour place even though happy hour is over it has good scenery
Under a minute later
Her: Sure, let's go there.

And that's where this stands.... I wonder if I'll meeting her tonight and how it will go.... I know in the past when I'm really interested in a girl and I put her on a pedestal (in this case cause she is very educated and intelligent) I haven't done well. I am going to just try and push that out of my mind and just be my jovial self.. We will see. I'm sure a lot of you want to crucify a lot of my dialogue so go ahead! I won't even talk crap back this time...
 

Roober

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Good luck to ya!

You shouldn't really ask her about where to go. Just say, "let's go ...." If she doesn't like the idea, she will let you know and maybe suggest how she feels. Then you can make a new suggestion.
 

sazc

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so, how did it go?
 

Reyaj

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so, how did it go?
I don't think good lol... I'll give you the play by play while it's fresh in my mind:

So the place that I originally told her to meet me was actually closed. I ended up wasting money for parking for that alone. Since I got there first I messaged her this and I suggested a place right next to it, she asked if I could meet somewhere closer to where she was because she would be walking. I told her I didn't mind picking her up, and she told me to meet her between intersecting streets in the city. Well I did that and she got in my car. I kissed her on both cheeks and drove around a bit till I found parking near a busy area of the city with lots of bars and restaurants. We talked while I was driving, mostly about her family situation and then she asked me about my job which I explained. She seemed impressed that I had my own company albeit a small one.

So anyway we parked and decided to walk up the street. She did mention she didn't eat and she wanted to, I said we could get pizza but she mentioned she had some kind of gluten problem or something... Anyway we end up walking by this bar she said she always wanted to go to. It looked chill enough so we went in there and sat at the bar. I ordered a burger and she just ordered fries. She took a while to decide on the beer she wanted but we ended up ordering drinks too. So we were talking and I think it was going pretty well.... I don't remember all the details of the convo but I know I brought up religion and she said she wasn't religious even though her family was... She grew up Catholic but saw the whole thing as a business and felt it was dictated to her by her family growing up... I basically let her I know I concurred and the conversation then turned to our hobbies and favorite movies etc... The way she was sitting she sort of had her legs angled towards me which I found to be an IOI in the past with girls... but I didn't really get to kino much.. I didn't want to be overbearing so it was mostly talk. There were a few pauses but not many... however I did have to check my cell phone a few times and she did the same texting one of her friends. She said that her friend wanted to come out and drink but she then said she was tired.. At one point she asked me for my age and I told her to guess.. she said I would say 30 and i told her she was right.. (i'm older) She said she is 23. Anyway the bartender came by after a while and asked her if she wanted another drink, she declined... Now I have found this to be a bad sign in the past when a girl only has 1 drink but I tried to stay composed. I asked her if she was tired and wanted to get going and she was like we can or we can go to another place its up to you... So I said ok we can check out another place. The check comes, she looks like she is reaching into her purse but I told her I got it... she was like no you don't have to, and I was like its fine.

So we walk down the block to the other place and we end up ordering another round of drinks.. I think at this point there was a bit of a pauses in convo.. but then we start up again, she said she wanted to teach me her language so she told me a few phrases... I then mentioned a few words and she started laughing.. This was a good sign. Also her legs again were slanted towards mine and my legs actually were touching her for a while and she didn't move them which I also thought was a good sign. So after more talking I asked her if she wanted a family or kids.. (She had mentioned she thought about moving to the US to start a family)... She then kind of changes her tune and was like I'm not really sure if I want kids, I'm too young for that. I know I don't want to be alone so I'd like to meet someone one day... (Now I kind of took this as a bad sign as if she is saying I'm not the one right in front of you, but I kept composed). She also mentioned how her sister is 20 and already wants a family and she is the total opposite of her and wants to do something first in the world and just isn't sure about kids now but maybe will change. I end up using the restroom and she then texts someone or is on her phone I don't know. The bartender asked her if she wanted another drink and she declined.

So anyway after a bit I tell her we could get going and that I have an early day... She is like yeah that's fine, I don't like to stay out late anyway I'm not in college anymore or some bs like that... I told her I don't mind that or I'm not kicking her out, if I didn't have to get up early I would. So we end up walking several blocks to where I park and sort of talked on the way... but her hands were in her pockets (it was cold though).. So I open the door for her in my car and I drive near to where she lives and pull over.

Now here is where I am disappointed and I think it went bad.... So after I pulled to the side of the road i subtely took off my seat belt. She started talking about something I can't remember what it was.. I then tell her it was nice seeing her and I lean in to kiss her. When I did this she turned her cheek so fast so I end up kissing her there. I then gave her a light hug I think in which she may have been surprised but gave me one back, light as well (hard to do in the front seat of a car). I then pull back and she was like tell me if you go to that event again with your friends I'd like to go.. I'm like ok if you really want to definitely. Now she is still in my car, not rushing out or anything... She is looking good, I had a few drinks so I lean in again to go for the kiss and immediately she turns her cheek to block... I think I also put my hand on her leg but I don't remember if it was before I went in for the kiss the second time or after.. But anyway At this point I'm thinking wtf.. I think we then said good night or something and she gets out of my car. That was that...

So my gut is telling me I put myself in the friend zone with this girl somehow. I think the best move might be to just go to that networking event again, say hello to her and then just start talking to other girls... If anyone thinks its worth trying to see this girl again let me know but I think she just isn't into me. As far as what I could have done different... I mean I guess I could have kino'd more but something was making me feel awkward about it... I don't know... And maybe I should have tried to bounce her to a third place for a drink. This girl was eccentric though... kept saying things like she isn't into girly stuff like make up or fashion (and it's true she is very naturally and simply pretty) and doesn't like how a lot of men just focus on looks blah blah blah. I guess what I'm saying is she definitely wasn't a girly girl. She was dressed pretty simple and didn't seem to wear much make up if any at all. She looked good, I found her very attractive. Its just something about the whole experience brought me nostalgia about when I used to date girls years ago waste time and money and not get anywhere..

Oh well feel free to fire away at me with your thoughts.
 

Reyaj

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I'm 90% sure I'm going to try put this girl in the friend zone, and then try to use pre selection to my advantage (if possible). Anyway one of the things she mentioned on our date was that her favorite move was interstellar and it explained a lot of scientific things or some bs.... So today I mentioned it to one of my friends and he told me the movie was bs and not realistic as no one could survive a black hole. Granted I never even heard of nor seen this movie.. but I messaged her that it didn't sound very really realistic and responded back rather quickly, "it's the best movie, you have to see it!!"

That was that lol
 

Thatfeel21

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She is an utter waste of time. How do you not see this?
 

Reyaj

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She is an utter waste of time. How do you not see this?
You're right. I think the fact that I already invested some time and money in this I'd like to see what happens with a little experiment. Basically if I treat her as a friend and start talking to other girls in front of her... but I won't put much effort into this.. maybe if I go to this networking event next week we'll see what happens. Her IL in me is low, I have to accept that.
 

Reyaj

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I ended up sending her a message 2 days later again regarding that movie to open and then asked if her family situation was any better. In the mean time I changed my default picture to a picture of me and an attractive girl... So she ended up answering my initial question, then followed up like 3 hours later but started asking how I was.... We asked about each other's thanksgiving plans etc.. then I didn't respond to late and she responded in the morning simply. While she didn't ask me anything specific regarding the girl in my picture, she did seem to be more chatty then she was prior.

So if I go to this networking event I'm going to greet her and be nice but then start talking to other girls... We'll see if she starts biting again or anything changes, but I'm basically not going to telegraph any romantic interests towards her unless she earns it.
 

Reyaj

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Other interesting thing I forgot to mention was that the original girl I made this thread about... I texted her Happy Thanksgiving and she didn't answer at all. Looks like once you dump a girl they don't even want to acknowledge you at all lol... Yet when a guy reacts negatively when they reject him (their word not mine) they act like men are wrong for acting aloof or upset.

I just looked at the people attending the network event on Monday and there is another attractive girl from the same country as the latest girl.. let's see if I have a chance to talk to her. I just think that if they end up becoming friends she might c-block me.. oh well can't know until you try!
 

Reyaj

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I didn't end up going to that network event Monday as I had other plans come up that I deemed more important. I had no intention of contacting this girl but was just going to show up next week or some time after and say hi if I saw her. To my shock she randomly messaged me yesterday asking how I was. Well I responded back this morning letting her know I have been traveling and asked how she was. She responded, but I'm going to respond to her tomorrow. I think I am going to do something a little similar that I'm doing with the cougar in that I'm going to act like she is my friend (remember I don't think she has interest in me right now) and interact with other females around her or somehow portray that others have interest in me. Let's see how this experiment goes.
 

Reyaj

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I ended up messaging her back the next day, she didn't respond, I was drinking so I texted her later in the evening saying I would be in the city she was in with a friend. She responded back quick saying she was with a friend and that she'd be free by 9pm and asked what I wanted to do, go out for drinks? I told her we could get beer, I texted her about 45 mins later asking her if she wanted to go to a certain place, she responded back saying she loved that place but was going to go home because she was tired and said we should do it another time. I agreed. That was that.
 

Reyaj

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So I felt the whim come over me... so this past Monday I told her I was going to this game night with my friends. She asked what time and all that, and wanted to come along with me. She was like "but how can I get there and back" I told her I could give her a ride and that is was no problem. So I picked her up, kissed her on the cheek and we talked on the ride there. She told me she was going to some kind of grab bag event with a group she's a part of this Sunday and asked me if I wanted to come along. I told her I might be away this weekend but I'd let her know...

So we went to this game night.. hung out with my friends, she seemed to be having a good time. I sat close to her but obviously didn't make any kind of move in front of my friends. So I end up driving her home, she tells me to let her know if I want to go to the grab bag event with her. This time I didn't try to kiss her or anything, just kissed her on the cheek and acted non chalant.

So a day later I end up texting her that I'm going to be away Saturday and Sunday but asked her what she was up to Friday night. She responded back that she has some boring meeting to go to for the program she is a part of and asked how I was doing. I told her I was doing well, and asked what time her meeting was.... She said it was at 7pm but wasn't sure what time it ended. I texted her back several hours later saying hopefully we get together soon and that I need her opinion on something. She responded back the next day with simple "Sure!"

That was that.... So my feeling either this girl sees me strictly as a friend or just wants to use me... I'm thinking I might try to use some pre selection with a job I work on, or try to get her out drinking one night and just make a move... Not sure.. but I don't really feel motivated to pursue her due to her low interest level. Does anyone think I'm misintrepeting anything and maybe she is interested in me?
 

Thatfeel21

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Ok...So you were out with her, PICKED her up and drover her HOME....when and why did you decide NOT to make a move?! Youve been talking about this woman for weeks and she finally blessed you by putting you into a situation where all you had to do was prove to be a man and TAKE what was in front of you, but yet you resort to simply kissing her on the cheek?! Shes given you so many chances to seal the deal, but yet it seems like YOU'RE the one that is playing games with her.
 
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Reyaj

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Ok...So you were out with her, PICKED her up and drover her HOME....when and why did you decide NOT to make a move?! Youve been talking about this woman for weeks and she finally blessed you by putting you into a situation where all you had to do was prove to be a man and TAKE what was in front of you, but yet you resort to simply kissing her on the cheek?! Shes given you so many chances to seal the deal, but yet it seems like YOU'RE the one that is playing games with her.
I did sort of try the first night, I went to kiss her but she turned her cheek... I tried it again and she did the same, very rapidly. This week I invited her to a holiday party on Friday, she said she couldn't make it cause she already had plans but said another time... Basically this girl isn't into me... any doubt I might have had has been erased. A girl that is into me will make herself available and not choose some other plan over me. I also looked at her facebook page and I saw she was at a hockey game last saturday... most likely she is seeing someone else.

I texted her "hope it works out" but then acted unphased and started asking her opinions on other girls. Anyway it's funny to see how the first girl I wrote this thread about made it obvious she was into me, and this girl didn't. I guess I just needed this reminder that if I can't tell if a girl is interested, she most likely isn't.
 

sazc

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Spend your time on the females that are making it clear that you are not wasting your time on them.
If none of those females "do it" for you, then you need to get out and meet more females.

You'll be fine
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Keep doing your thing playa. This thread has been a good read and a lot of lessons can be learned. I'm in a relationship as well and love to game and get new chicks. It's my obsession.
 

Thatfeel21

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Reyaj said:
I did sort of try the first night, I went to kiss her but she turned her cheek... I tried it again and she did the same, very rapidly. This week I invited her to a holiday party on Friday, she said she couldn't make it cause she already had plans but said another time... Basically this girl isn't into me... any doubt I might have had has been erased. A girl that is into me will make herself available and not choose some other plan over me. I also looked at her facebook page and I saw she was at a hockey game last saturday... most likely she is seeing someone else.

I texted her "hope it works out" but then acted unphased and started asking her opinions on other girls. Anyway it's funny to see how the first girl I wrote this thread about made it obvious she was into me, and this girl didn't. I guess I just needed this reminder that if I can't tell if a girl is interested, she most likely isn't.
Everyone but YOU could tell her Interest wasnt there...at all. Should never be that difficult to hang with a woman.
 
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