Going slow/taking things slow

[Murk]

What does this actually mean when a woman says it?

When I've heard this before it was just words to excuse supposed "slvt" behavior later that night when I smash.

It can mean lots of things, she might have a timetable to sex "6 date rule" or w/e, or maybe doesn't want to rush in and ruin it what you have, or maybe she is not fully in it and wants a chance to back out later?

Any of the older guys got some pearls of wisdom you can spray across my neck on this one?

 

[Chi Town]

It means shes not into you, if she was high interest she will not try to take it slow, it means the guy is not her first option but wants to keep him around for attention and as a backup

 

[marvinlfloresq]

What does this actually mean when a woman says it?

When I've heard this before it was just words to excuse supposed "slvt" behavior later that night when I smash.

It can mean lots of things, she might have a timetable to sex "6 date rule" or w/e, or maybe doesn't want to rush in and ruin it what you have, or maybe she is not fully in it and wants a chance to back out later?

Any of the older guys got some pearls of wisdom you can spray across my neck on this one?

Taking it slow means, "you are rushing for sex" - her comfort level is in jeopardy.
(if you already had sex, it means you are *smothering her, relax & back off a little)

When a woman says this, just start over, Focus on getting to know her. This could also be a sign she needs more comfort then usual, like she's a rape victim. Either way, you are going too fast for her. She's uncomfortable.

 

[Spaz]

It means shes not into you, if she was high interest she will not try to take it slow.

100% this.

it means the guy is not her first option but wants to keep him around for attention and as a backup

51% this.

 

[Murk]

Yeah she has trust issues and struggles to open up and had a few issues in her past.

What’s the other alternative to her not liking me? Because I know for sure this broad likes me and I’m not gonna argue it. We have already smashed, yes, it’s the girl who is currently my tenant who I’ve been friend with over a year, we had a long talk Sunday, said we should get to know each other better, she said let’s go get std tested together seeing as she’s on the pill and I hate condoms.l although we have not smashed since and both said we shouldn’t smash drunk, at least for a while (yeah whatever).

And she was like, let’s just take it slow. In my mind I’m thinking to go on these dates with other chicks I have waiting in the wings. One 19 year old I was seeing years ago reached out yesterday, apparently had a “dream” about me, she’s now 22 and wants to meet me.

All the while im thinking this btch I’m living with don’t want me bringing chicks back. But is not hesitant to let me steamroll and smash daily, we did agree living together makes it a sensitive situation. I’m struggling to escalate from this position, I’m like a turtle on its back.

It’s her bday Friday and she’s asked for bday sex to which I said yes.

 

[AJ84]

Yeah she has trust issues and struggles to open up and had a few issues in her past.

What’s the other alternative to her not liking me? Because I know for sure this broad likes me and I’m not gonna argue it. We have already smashed, yes, it’s the girl who is currently my tenant who I’ve been friend with over a year, we had a long talk Sunday, said we should get to know each other better, she said let’s go get std tested together seeing as she’s on the pill and I hate condoms.l although we have not smashed since and both said we shouldn’t smash drunk, at least for a while (yeah whatever).

And she was like, let’s just take it slow. In my mind I’m thinking to go on these dates with other chicks I have waiting in the wings. One 19 year old I was seeing years ago reached out yesterday, apparently had a “dream” about me, she’s now 22 and wants to meet me.

All the while im thinking this btch I’m living with don’t want me bringing chicks back. But is not hesitant to let me steamroll and smash daily, we did agree living together makes it a sensitive situation. I’m struggling to escalate from this position, I’m like a turtle on its back.

It’s her bday Friday and she’s asked for bday sex to which I said yes.

The same girl from your other thread? The tenant? The drama situation? Now you both want to backtrack and restart in reverse?
All I can say is that it’s very hard to repackage a busted can of biscuits.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Any of the older guys got some pearls of wisdom you can spray across my neck on this one?

I'd rather just tell you, if you don't mind...

I can also mean that she sees you as boyfriend or lover material, so she doesn't want to blow it (if you'll pardon the expression), by jumping into quick sex. She wants to feel a sense of being valued by you, that she's not just another lay.

Interesting how the bad boys get the instant lays, while the good guys are expected to wait and "prove" themselves without access to the candy.

 

[nismo-4]

Second place is first loser.

Show me a woman who says this to Lebron James or Idris Elba and I'll sell you some oceanfront condos in Kansas. I'll even throw in some from Wyoming at half price.

This just means she's waiting for Chad, Tyrone, or Hiroshi to become available. Maybe even Enrique or Antonio.

You'll be an orbiter for a while or just a friend.

 

[marmel75]

What does this actually mean when a woman says it?

When I've heard this before it was just words to excuse supposed "slvt" behavior later that night when I smash.

It can mean lots of things, she might have a timetable to sex "6 date rule" or w/e, or maybe doesn't want to rush in and ruin it what you have, or maybe she is not fully in it and wants a chance to back out later?

Any of the older guys got some pearls of wisdom you can spray across my neck on this one?

It means mostly nothing. Many times when a woman says things like this its because she is almost trying to convince herself that is what needs to happen. Basically she is hoping you will not push the issue ans just go by what she says because she is too weak to actually follow through on it and will give in.

Pay attention to her words not her actions. I once had a chick tell me she wont sleep with a guy for 3 months until she is sure she he is a good guy.

So I said "Cool...lets do 6 months just to make doubly sure". And what happened? She basically raped me on the 3rd date because I kept sexually teasing her and then told her she had to wait 6 months...everytime she brought something up I told her 6 months.

 

[marvinlfloresq]

Yeah she has trust issues and struggles to open up and had a few issues in her past.

What’s the other alternative to her not liking me? Because I know for sure this broad likes me and I’m not gonna argue it. We have already smashed, yes, it’s the girl who is currently my tenant who I’ve been friend with over a year, we had a long talk Sunday, said we should get to know each other better, she said let’s go get std tested together seeing as she’s on the pill and I hate condoms.l although we have not smashed since and both said we shouldn’t smash drunk, at least for a while (yeah whatever).

And she was like, let’s just take it slow. In my mind I’m thinking to go on these dates with other chicks I have waiting in the wings. One 19 year old I was seeing years ago reached out yesterday, apparently had a “dream” about me, she’s now 22 and wants to meet me.

All the while im thinking this btch I’m living with don’t want me bringing chicks back. But is not hesitant to let me steamroll and smash daily, we did agree living together makes it a sensitive situation. I’m struggling to escalate from this position, I’m like a turtle on its back.

It’s her bday Friday and she’s asked for bday sex to which I said yes.

Ah, this makes sense. You have living arrangements. She wants to procceed with caution in case it goes sour, so she wont be force to move.

* This may not end well, may get akward.

 

[devilkingx2]

What does this actually mean when a woman says it?

When I've heard this before it was just words to excuse supposed "slvt" behavior later that night when I smash.

It can mean lots of things, she might have a timetable to sex "6 date rule" or w/e, or maybe doesn't want to rush in and ruin it what you have, or maybe she is not fully in it and wants a chance to back out later?

Any of the older guys got some pearls of wisdom you can spray across my neck on this one?

It depends entirely on the context

Some girls are virgins/inexperienced and to them sex is like agreeing to become a vampire or let a demon take your soul

Some girls are prudes and just don't really like/care about sex.

Some girls are control freaks who want to things to happen on their whims

Some girls are following some wacko superstituous rulebook they got out of a magazine or TV show or from some chronically single friend of theirs

Some girls are stringing you along for attention or to gold dig or as a backup

Most of them are some variety of not actually all that into you, otherwise they would be horny, not logical or rational or reserved

In almost no case is it a good or acceptable thing, push past it if you can, find a new girl or dread game if you can't.

Yeah she has trust issues and struggles to open up and had a few issues in her past.

What’s the other alternative to her not liking me? Because I know for sure this broad likes me and I’m not gonna argue it. We have already smashed, yes, it’s the girl who is currently my tenant who I’ve been friend with over a year, we had a long talk Sunday, said we should get to know each other better, she said let’s go get std tested together seeing as she’s on the pill and I hate condoms.l although we have not smashed since and both said we shouldn’t smash drunk, at least for a while (yeah whatever).

And she was like, let’s just take it slow. In my mind I’m thinking to go on these dates with other chicks I have waiting in the wings. One 19 year old I was seeing years ago reached out yesterday, apparently had a “dream” about me, she’s now 22 and wants to meet me.

All the while im thinking this btch I’m living with don’t want me bringing chicks back. But is not hesitant to let me steamroll and smash daily, we did agree living together makes it a sensitive situation. I’m struggling to escalate from this position, I’m like a turtle on its back.

It’s her bday Friday and she’s asked for bday sex to which I said yes.

...this is the same cocaine addicted party girl who bangs random guys at your house and tells you they're friends?

The same one you've known for years?

And she wants to take things slow?

She wants to cuck you into a beta bux provider that she pays for rent with once a month sex rather than money, don't accept that awful deal bro.

Do as you please, don't let her get you into a submission hold

 

[Murk]

Ah, this makes sense. You have living arrangements. She wants to procceed with caution in case it goes sour, so she wont be force to move.

* This may not end well, may get akward.

I think hence the going slow, she’s also said she is more willing to give it a go when she moves out.

I’ve already backtracked in my mind and just want to smash other chicks, 2 girls in particular have their own place I can go to.

This girl has asked that I stop being secretive when I go missing or when I go for drinks or dinner with “friend” but really that’s only something a gf can ask for, so I’m prob just gonna end up lying to her.

 

[devilkingx2]

This girl has asked that I stop being secretive when I go missing or when I go for drinks or dinner with “friend” but really that’s only something a gf can ask for, so I’m prob just gonna end up lying to her

A gf would ask you not to do it, not that you just be open and honest with her about it lmao

 

[17 shots]

she’s also said she is more willing to give it a go when she moves

If you want out, she's giving you an out... just agree with her, and it's over

 

[Murk]

If you want out, she's giving you an out... just agree with her, and it's over

I already did agree, I initially told her it's not appropriate when she said "let's see what happens" a couple weeks ago.

Now too much has gone on or us to bring others back without it getting messy which is what she said.

 

[marvinlfloresq]

I already did agree, I initially told her it's not appropriate when she said "let's see what happens" a couple weeks ago.

Now too much has gone on or us to bring others back without it getting messy which is what she said.

There it is. She's trying to out-manuver you -

You hold all the cards. Slowly, she's trying to be gf material. (Or live for free if your not careful)

 

[Dash Riprock]

Pay attention to her words not her actions.

What??!!

NEVER listen to what she says. ALWAYS judge on ACTIONS.

 

[Murk]

Ok so how should I proceed? If nothing happens this weekend I’m going on a sex rampage while she’s in Morocco next week and I will just continue as platonic friends and go see girls and be honest with her about it

 

[Spaz]

What??!!

NEVER listen to what she says. ALWAYS judge on ACTIONS.

Lol. I think he typed it wrong.

Overall he's right.

 

[marmel75]

What??!!

NEVER listen to what she says. ALWAYS judge on ACTIONS.

My fault...I wrote that backwards. Replace that sentence with the one above