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Going on a cruise with my ex

Robert28

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This is probably one of the stupidest things I’ve ever done. Last year I agreed to go on a cruise with a girl I was dating and her family. We’d been dating off and on for a year before she finally laid the “let’s just be friends” line on me. Well she didn’t do that until a couple months after I’d already booked my part on it and paid my $1200. We are going April 24-May 1 and I honestly wasn’t planning on going, just figured I’d have to eat the $1200 and call it a hard lesson. She contacted me this past weekend to tell me to finalize everything on my end (passport, etc). I was shocked she still wanted me to go. Honestly I think her mom and kid wants me to go, because her mom thinks I can do no wrong.lol

So I didn’t say much because I didn’t feel like having some long convo with her, I just was caught off guard that she’s still planning on me going and we haven’t talked to or seen each other since end of last year. I can’t help but think this will be an awkward trip but there isn’t any bad blood between us, she just sees me as a friend now and even though we don’t talk or hangout, a cruise is still a cruise and I do like to travel.
I contacted Carnival about getting my $1200 back but I didn’t purchase some insurance and since it’s only 2 months away, I’m screwed. I can’t even change my room, I’ll have to sleep in the same room and bed as her. I think there could be a fold out couch in the room since we did get some suite upgrade thing so maybe I’ll be crashing on that.
I know I’ll have a good time because I can make the best out of any situation but man is this awkward. Doesn’t seem awkward for her but it is for me since she’s lost all her feelings for me apparently but I might still have a sliver of them, I’m just not sure how strong since I haven’t seen her or talked to her to know. The bright side is I’ve been working out with a trainer hardcore and I’m in the best shape of my life right now, I’ve always been in decent shape but he’s kicked it up a notch. I’m not planning on her fawning over me when we are on the beach or pool when she sees how in shape I am, but who knows, women are shallow like that.haha
 

mrgoodstuff

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This is probably one of the stupidest things I’ve ever done. Last year I agreed to go on a cruise with a girl I was dating and her family. We’d been dating off and on for a year before she finally laid the “let’s just be friends” line on me. Well she didn’t do that until a couple months after I’d already booked my part on it and paid my $1200. We are going April 24-May 1 and I honestly wasn’t planning on going, just figured I’d have to eat the $1200 and call it a hard lesson. She contacted me this past weekend to tell me to finalize everything on my end (passport, etc). I was shocked she still wanted me to go. Honestly I think her mom and kid wants me to go, because her mom thinks I can do no wrong.lol

So I didn’t say much because I didn’t feel like having some long convo with her, I just was caught off guard that she’s still planning on me going and we haven’t talked to or seen each other since end of last year. I can’t help but think this will be an awkward trip but there isn’t any bad blood between us, she just sees me as a friend now and even though we don’t talk or hangout, a cruise is still a cruise and I do like to travel.
I contacted Carnival about getting my $1200 back but I didn’t purchase some insurance and since it’s only 2 months away, I’m screwed. I can’t even change my room, I’ll have to sleep in the same room and bed as her. I think there could be a fold out couch in the room since we did get some suite upgrade thing so maybe I’ll be crashing on that.
I know I’ll have a good time because I can make the best out of any situation but man is this awkward. Doesn’t seem awkward for her but it is for me since she’s lost all her feelings for me apparently but I might still have a sliver of them, I’m just not sure how strong since I haven’t seen her or talked to her to know. The bright side is I’ve been working out with a trainer hardcore and I’m in the best shape of my life right now, I’ve always been in decent shape but he’s kicked it up a notch. I’m not planning on her fawning over me when we are on the beach or pool when she sees how in shape I am, but who knows, women are shallow like that.haha
Go up there for the fun and don't SWEAT her dude. It'lll be fun. If she's feeling all over you and leaning into you, go with it.
 

Robert28

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Go up there for the fun and don't SWEAT her dude. It'lll be fun. If she's feeling all over you and leaning into you, go with it.
Well I mean we are flying together (her mom and kid too) and staying in a hotel that night and leave the next morning. I’ve just learned my lesson about agreeing to trips in advance with someone I’m dating. Never again.lol
 

mrgoodstuff

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Well I mean we are flying together (her mom and kid too) and staying in a hotel that night and leave the next morning. I’ve just learned my lesson about agreeing to trips in advance with someone I’m dating. Never again.lol
Behind the scenes you can step away from them, and do some flirting in a distant bar, to get your swag up... You want to go up there swagged up and full of confidence.
 

RickTheToad

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This is probably one of the stupidest things I’ve ever done. Last year I agreed to go on a cruise with a girl I was dating and her family. We’d been dating off and on for a year before she finally laid the “let’s just be friends” line on me. Well she didn’t do that until a couple months after I’d already booked my part on it and paid my $1200. We are going April 24-May 1 and I honestly wasn’t planning on going, just figured I’d have to eat the $1200 and call it a hard lesson. She contacted me this past weekend to tell me to finalize everything on my end (passport, etc). I was shocked she still wanted me to go. Honestly I think her mom and kid wants me to go, because her mom thinks I can do no wrong.lol

So I didn’t say much because I didn’t feel like having some long convo with her, I just was caught off guard that she’s still planning on me going and we haven’t talked to or seen each other since end of last year. I can’t help but think this will be an awkward trip but there isn’t any bad blood between us, she just sees me as a friend now and even though we don’t talk or hangout, a cruise is still a cruise and I do like to travel.
I contacted Carnival about getting my $1200 back but I didn’t purchase some insurance and since it’s only 2 months away, I’m screwed. I can’t even change my room, I’ll have to sleep in the same room and bed as her. I think there could be a fold out couch in the room since we did get some suite upgrade thing so maybe I’ll be crashing on that.
I know I’ll have a good time because I can make the best out of any situation but man is this awkward. Doesn’t seem awkward for her but it is for me since she’s lost all her feelings for me apparently but I might still have a sliver of them, I’m just not sure how strong since I haven’t seen her or talked to her to know. The bright side is I’ve been working out with a trainer hardcore and I’m in the best shape of my life right now, I’ve always been in decent shape but he’s kicked it up a notch. I’m not planning on her fawning over me when we are on the beach or pool when she sees how in shape I am, but who knows, women are shallow like that.haha
Unwise on so many levels. You know, she's going to flirt and possibly bring a dude back to get your jealous. Worse off, you can get quarantined due to the corona virus. Eat up the 1200 as stupid tax.
 

ubercat

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Interesting. Prob is she can make a jealousy play easier than you can. Same bed means u can play with it. Friendship hug friendship kiss friendship bang. other thing is once you do nail her then you have to tell her whatever is needed to string her along for the trip or it's going to get real uncomfortable real quick
 

lamath

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Unwise on so many levels. You know, she's going to flirt and possibly bring a dude back to get your jealous. Worse off, you can get quarantined due to the corona virus. Eat up the 1200 as stupid tax.
This is what you should do.

You cant win going on that trip, even hook up with some other chicks is gonna be hard since you share a cabin with ber.

This is ridiculous stuff, yes she still care man but more as a back up plan. You really want to be a back up.plan?
 

cola

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Unwise on so many levels. You know, she's going to flirt and possibly bring a dude back to get your jealous. Worse off, you can get quarantined due to the corona virus. Eat up the 1200 as stupid tax.
Man screw that, I know you make the big bucks but $1200 ain’t a drop in the bucket. He needs to go on that cruise and have fun, who has $1200 to waste?

If she would dare bring a dude back to their shared cabin she has 0 respect for him as a human being, no one would stoop that low..
 

Billtx49

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The biggest risk I see with the cruise concept is, she also has her family there, yes, but you’re both separated from your social/support circles and in an unfamiliar environment. Being there with an ex intimate partner and possible lingering feelings poses an extremely high risk of making decisions that are not based in reality…
 

logicallefty

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Man I don't know. Yeah I could see you getting some 'friendship' tail which I have done many times in other situations. But it also could go really South too. I had a situation once with a current GF where I was supposed to go out of town with her and her kids. We were fighting like cats and dogs and a day before we were supposed to fly out I told her I wasn't going and needed a break from her. I ate my $400 plane ticket and she and the kids went without me. We broke up just a few days after she got back. I picked them up at the airport and we were fighting before we got to the car. That would have been a miserable trip so glad I didn't go. But yeah OP give it some long thought. Weight the pros and cons real good.
 

lamath

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I think most ppl would not handle a situation like this the right way.
Like said before you are in a new enviroment without any support with a ex that left you.

Unless you know and are sure that you can handle w/e happens with your ex, its not a good idea.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Man screw that, I know you make the big bucks but $1200 ain’t a drop in the bucket. He needs to go on that cruise and have fun, who has $1200 to waste?

If she would dare bring a dude back to their shared cabin she has 0 respect for him as a human being, no one would stoop that low..
Does he respect himself?
 

mrgoodstuff

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The biggest risk I see with the cruise concept is, she also has her family there, yes, but you’re both separated from your social/support circles and in an unfamiliar environment. Being there with an ex intimate partner and possible lingering feelings poses an extremely high risk of making decisions that are not well based in reality…
With her family there she might not be as willing to stoop as low as bring another guy around. Perhaps Shes hopeful about them?
 

RickTheToad

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Man screw that, I know you make the big bucks but $1200 ain’t a drop in the bucket. He needs to go on that cruise and have fun, who has $1200 to waste?

If she would dare bring a dude back to their shared cabin she has 0 respect for him as a human being, no one would stoop that low..
I do okay, no big bucks; as you say. It's expensive to live in CT my friend.

Anyways, it's not worth the emotional cost and stress. Plus, with nearly every cruise ship being quarantined due to Corona, it's not worth the risk, stress and BS that he will most undoubtedly experience. If he put it on a credit card and he has trip delay insurance (from a credit card such as Chase Sapphire or AMEX), they may cover it if he had a medical cause (use your imagination).
 

RickTheToad

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With her family there she might not be as willing to stoop as low as bring another guy around. Perhaps Shes hopeful about them?
Doubtful. She wants this dude to pay.

I think most ppl would not handle a situation like this the right way.
Like said before you are in a new enviroment without any support with a ex that left you.

Unless you know and are sure that you can handle w/e happens with your ex, its not a good idea.
I'd give this ticket to a person she hates the most for free. I'd then say, can't go, but relax, I got someone to take my place. Have a wonderful time. Take pics for the memories!! But hey, that's me.. I'm a vengeful motherf ucker.
 
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