Maxtro
Master Don Juan
What do you mean by that? How have I been staying in my comfort zone?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
So, did she "grab your pump" after all?Maxtro said:I'll briefly invite her inside to grab my pump and I'll offer her some water.
ohhhh, I see what you did there? lmaoHuffman said:So, did she "grab your pump" after all?![]()
Now, what did you learn from this experience? If you did learn anything, you're bound to be getting/making the same mistake.Maxtro said:LOL, no. I didn't even realize I said it like that
This girl is history and I'll probably never see or talk to her again unless I run into her on campus.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Predictably enough, she has you jumping through her hoops. She picks, you get to do the cooking or go to a sexless lunch where she'll pay for her stuff (translation: "I don't want to owe you anything or make you think I am interested, so I'll pay for my stuff". She says "jump!", you say, "How high"? At this point she knows you are salivating worse than Pavlov's dogs! Behaving like a predictable good doggy! :kick:Maxtro said:And out of nowhere I get a random text
Her: You want to get lunch Monday?
WTF? I had already deleted her number but I recognized her area code.
Then it went like this.
Me: U buying?
Her: No, u cookin?
Her: Ill pay for My stuff. Lol
Me: Cookings an interesting idea, u like buffalo wings?
She hasn't replied yet.
Frankly I'm amazed that she contacted me.
Edit: Still going on. Seems like she wants Vietnamese food.
Why do you refuse to hear what you need to hear and resort to hearing only what you want to hear?Maxtro said:I don't care about the attention and I rather not have drama here.
You know better, and she is spelling it out, making it LOUD AND CLEAR that she has no interest.Maxtro said:First off, I wouldn't pay for her stuff period. I know better than to think that paying for girls shit entitles you to pussy.
Really, like what? Reaching across the table at the restaurant, and gropping her and get freaky?Maxtro said:An asexual lunch? So be it. That doesn't mean that I'm not going to try anything.
Because she knows you're interested. Duh. I don't know, I heard that women love to get attention. Not sure if that's true, but that might be a reason.Maxtro said:What I can't figure out is why she is inviting a guy whom she knows is interested in her to lunch with her.
Yes, but not by listening to her and going along with everything she suggests. You first need to stop doing everything that is NOT working, everything that is getting in the way, before you can begin doing stuff that might actually swing things in your favor.Maxtro said:Is there anything I can do to turn this in my favor?
Compare this to this...Maxtro said:And out of nowhere I get a random text
Her: You want to get lunch Monday?
WTF? I had already deleted her number but I recognized her area code.
Then it went like this.
Me: U buying?
Her: No, u cookin?
Her: Ill pay for My stuff. Lol
Me: Cookings an interesting idea, u like buffalo wings?
She hasn't replied yet.
Maxtro said:I deleted her number and email address.....
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Rule #1: Anytime anybody begins a statement with "Honestly", you can automatically disregard what they say after as being anything but honest.Maxtro said:Honestly this whole interaction with her is now more like a science project. My interest for her has dramatically lowered. Now I'm just trying to figure out what the hell she's thinking. I'm also going to be testing the boundaries till she tells me no. Then I walk away.
The old carrot and stick trick.Maxtro said:If she wants a friend who's going to keep trying to hook up with her then that's on her. I have nothing to lose.
Yes you do, you have your time when you should be doing other things - be it working on yourself, or out with other friends/girls. What's the point in spending time with this girl if nothing is ever going to happen? which is what YOU want.Maxtro said:If she wants a friend who's going to keep trying to hook up with her then that's on her. I have nothing to lose.
PokerStar said:i think maxtro is not comfortable of getting out of his comfort zone.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.