You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
You buy a bag of dates from the supermarket, have her try one with a blind-fold on and ask her what she thinks it is.Maxtro said:Ok then, how do you make certain that she knows it's a date?
I'm assuming that specifically saying it's a date is a bad thing.
That's my thinking. When we talked there was teasing and very flirty conversation. So tomorrow should be a date. My biggest concern was that the last time I saw her was 20 days ago. So there is a huge chance all her interest has faded away.Alle_Gory said:Rule of thumb is, if there's interest then it's a date.
Depends how you behaved around her so far. Is it friendly conversation? Or is there playful teasing, flirting, and even touch?
Can we get an English translation?f283000 said:Maxtro you like if you say you have read the dj bible because you haven't!
i find this an oppurtunity to rekindle the flame and perhaps make the fire burn even brighter.Maxtro said:. So there is a huge chance all her interest has faded away.
He implies you should by now have read the DJ bible... and that questions to your answers could easily be found in the Man's Book of Life.Maxtro said:Can we get an English translation?
@ corrector, clever![]()
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Well jeez, don't take anything I or anyone says as gospel so fast. I don't know you, this girl, or the situation, even if you wrote out a 100 page detailed description of all three.Ok then, how do you make certain that she knows it's a date?
I'm assuming that specifically saying it's a date is a bad thing.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Good idea about the drinks, she will be silly putty in your hands.Maxtro said:- I was friendzoned.
- she just doesn't like me.
- she just wants to be friends for now
- she'll probably never change her mind
- she doesn't want anything serious
- Maybe I'll get drinks with her next week.
I did lots of kino and I constantly teased her. When we were sitting on the rocks I brought up that I wanted to get to know her better and that's when she shot me down. If she responded differently, I would have kissed her then.ARrocket said:Did you try to make a move physically like you had planned?
Did the topic of you being interested in more than a platonic relationship come up?
Next time go out for drinks in the first place bro.
Not very comforting since I'm probably not going to die until 60 years from now. Living alone from now until then is too painful. Heck, I'd at least want be happy with the fact that I got a chick before I died. 28 years old and I still haven't accomplished that.Nygard said:After we all die, it's all over. All the times we managed to have sex with a hot chick or not will not matter. Let it go. Only after we lose it all, we're truly free. Life is too short to lose sleep over women, always attracted to people with the lowest morals.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.