LittleBigOne
Don Juan
I was just wondering about this. There must be amazing stories which can help other DJ´s.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Sounds like you got that from the internet.Alex DeLarge said:-She touches you frequently
-She contacts you frequently
-She goes out of her way to see you
-She does favors for you
-Frequent eye contact in conversations. If she's locking eyes with you for prolonged periods of time.
-She laughs a lot in conversation with you, even if your jokes are stupid.
-She calls you handsome (not like your mom lol)
-She compliments you on what you're wearing
-If you've been dating her, she asks if you've been dating other people
-She wants to meet your friends (to make sure they aren't getting you into trouble lol)
-she texts you really late at night, or sends you a "good morning"/"good night" text.
Alex DeLarge said:Not by being an AFC and having emotional diarrhea on her.
Thats a good list, chock full of truth Alex.Alex DeLarge said:-She touches you frequently
-She contacts you frequently
-She goes out of her way to see you
-She does favors for you
-Frequent eye contact in conversations. If she's locking eyes with you for prolonged periods of time.
-She laughs a lot in conversation with you, even if your jokes are stupid.
-She calls you handsome (not like your mom lol)
-She compliments you on what you're wearing
-If you've been dating her, she asks if you've been dating other people
-She wants to meet your friends (to make sure they aren't getting you into trouble lol)
-she texts you really late at night, or sends you a "good morning"/"good night" text.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Oh no, another clueless idiot.pdx1138 said:Thats a good list, chock full of truth Alex.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Drop the ego, dude.loveorlust said:Oh no, another clueless idiot.
YES!! Very true.floydb25 said:Noticing details about your presentation; when it changes (ie, haircut)
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
You never reason with a girl about her feelings, you think you can make her see sense that she really likes you? If she said that to you then just accept and move on, she's not joking and it's not a test.drift king said:I've had all of these mentioned above.. but then after a 3rd date she'll text me to say she was never attracted to me!! WTF?
Is this cos her present feelings are what matter and whatever happened before doesnt?
i tried to reason with her that she was.. but that's stupid having that kind of convo i realize but it just baffles me that a girl will show all kinds of IL and suddenly when she no longer feels it, states she never did. it's like a stab to the heart.
Yes. She lost interest. This is similar to saying they never loved or cared about you. They go by how they feel RIGHT NOW. It doesn't mean they never liked you.drift king said:I've had all of these mentioned above.. but then after a 3rd date she'll text me to say she was never attracted to me!! WTF?
Is this cos her present feelings are what matter and whatever happened before doesnt?
i tried to reason with her that she was.. but that's stupid having that kind of convo i realize but it just baffles me that a girl will show all kinds of IL and suddenly when she no longer feels it, states she never did. it's like a stab to the heart.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.