Give me some examples of being more direct about what I want, because apparently I’m doing it wrong

[Robert28]

I thought if you told a girl at the beginning you weren’t looking for friends and if she ever felt like she saw me as a friend to tell me so I could walk away. This girl I’ve been seeing for a few weeks had been hot and cold on me, so if just followed her hot and cold patterns. Now, I know that if a girl is interested in you they’ll make it easy, and she did in the beginning but not anymore. All affection has dried up on her end and it’s not fun hanging out with her anymore. The problem is she still wants to go on dates and I’m paying for this ****, and the sex was all the time but nothing in the last couple of weeks. Hell the last 3 times she won’t even kiss me when I’ve tried and I’m thinking wth. I suspect she’s either getting ready to cut me loose cause she met someone else or she’s about to drop the “lets be friends” thing on me cause I refuse to pickup on her stupid signals even though I know what they mean.

I know she doesn’t want to lose me and she’s trying to figure out how she can keep me around while dating someone else but I’m not feeling that at all, I have other girls I’m seeing so I’ll be fine without her.

I’ve been about as direct as I can be with her, verbally and physically, I can’t get any more direct about what I want than I have.

 

[marmel75]

Just tell her straight up:

"I dont believe in going backwards when dating someone so we wont be seeing each other anymore. Take care." And then bounce and ignore her 100 text messages she will send explaining herself.

 

[Hal9000]

Yeah not taking her out on any more dates when she's clearly using you for a free meal would be pretty direct.

 

[lamath]

You ****ed her and now she is turning down a simple kiss?

Time for a hard af NEXT!!!
She is disrespect8ng you.

 

[Spaz]

She's not kissing you because she's fvcking another man but have not yet completely hooked him, you are now the back up just in case she's dumped.

 

[Spaz]

She is not kissing him because her mouth probably tastes like balls.

It sounds like a joke but it's not. I have a friend who once told me a story of how a woman would come over and give him head and then go hang out with her "date."

Same thing with cucked husbands, wife refuses to give him sex because she feels she's cheating on her new lover.

Women logic.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Given all you've said, why are you still even talking to her, let alone paying for dates? Why are you waiting for her to tell you she's done? Why do you keep coming back for more if she's treating you like that? You've gone on three dates with her without even so much as a kiss?

Clearly she is over it. Part of her continuing to see you is for her to gauge how much of a man you are by seeing how much you'll put up with. This will help her make it easier on herself to cut you lose formally. You are failing that test miserably and only making it easier for her.

You should have done this long ago by the sounds of it, but it is time to employ silence and distance. Don't let her back in unless she is begging for it, and even then she should only be a plate.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Wish I could say I didn't have to learn that the hard way, several times. But here I am, all the better for it.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Even in break ups, women want you to take the lead/responsibility

Never thought of it that way, but that's a great way to frame it and verbalize it. There is nothing worse for a woman than seeing a guy who can't take a hint, and it goes for both escalation and termination.

 

[Robert28]

Well I’m seeing other women but I haven’t cut her off, she doesn’t know I’m seeing them though. The weird thing is she’s suggested the last 3 dates and everything is fine except for the kissing part. I don’t want to be some needy ass guy and be like “why aren’t you kissing me? Boohoo hoo”. I can tell this is going south fast but shouldn’t she stop wanting to be around me or does she want some big blowout in person? Maybe she’s trying to shoehorn me into the friend zone but she knows I’ll haul ass because I told her in the beginning I don’t do friends. The dates we’ve gone on have been cheap anyways, $20 for baseball tickets and some other random stuff. It wasn’t fancy ass dinners or anything expensive at all.

I guess I haven’t cut ties yet because she claimed she was going through anxiety and depression recently so I figured her lack of affection was due to that, but I’m fooling myself. I know there’s someone else and that’s fine. I will probably just block and delete her from Facebook. Think that’s too childish and petty?

 

[backseatjuan]

Only date women with high interest.

Reason she's dumping you could be:
a) Sex was lousy, and everything related to sex, dck size, how long you last, how often you fck, etc.
b) You're boring and take forever to fck.
c) You're fun on date and lousy in bed.

From all of the above, if she finds something better, then voila, her behavior. No need to get mad though, that's how they roll. That's why you only date women with high interest.

 

[sazc]

This thing with her is brand new, supposedly still in the honeymoon stage, and it's bad, really bad. Consider it OVER and just NC and move on. If you need to say something to her (which idk why you would bc she's not being respectful to you) then just tell her the truth - "I'm just not feeling the chemistry is there, so I'm going to let you go"

It's the truth bc she's clearly not behaving as if SHE is feeling chemistry between you, so throw that shiz back on her face.

If you really want to teach her a lesson tell her "it's clear you aren't interested so we should move on" the problem with that statement is that it gives her room to grovel and (attempt to) change. But this is who she is, and she's not going to change

Ugh, pull up your respect panties from the floor and stop wasting your time

 

[Robert28]

So I told her I was tired of getting mixed signals and thought we shouldn’t hangout anymore. Of course I got the whole “but I’m just not in a good place for a relationship right now and need a friend”(we were never in a relationship but I knew this meant you get no sex and I keep getting everything I want). So I said “sorry I am not interested in friendship but if you’d like to continue a casual sexual relationship with me I’d be fine with that. Then I got called an ******* and told to F off and I was just like all other guys who just wanted sex.lol I do feel better though.

 

[Kotaix]

She's a golddigger, good riddance

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Same thing with cucked husbands, wife refuses to give him sex because she feels she's cheating on her new lover.

Women logic.

Yep its side dudes puzzy

 

[Robert28]

She's a golddigger, good riddance

Well I’ve never discussed my financial status with her so I don’t know how she can tell how much gold I have to dig. Maybe from my clothes? My 2018 truck? Like I said, we’ve never gone in any expensive dates at all before.

 

[Robert28]

Yep its side dudes puzzy

Well unfortunately the husband is in a bad, expensive position. He can’t just say screw it and walk away without costing him a lot of stress and money. I can walk away free and clear.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Using a man for attention, validation, and whining is not a friendship, especially if the man does not desire these same things from her in return, and I sure hope no man would.

I fail to see why her expecting this from you is ok, but you wanting sex with her (which should be a MUTUALLY enjoyable experience) is somehow not. But that's what many women believe.

The only way to break the pattern is to refuse to accept it.

 

[Epic Days]

She's not kissing you because she's fvcking another man but have not yet completely hooked him, you are now the back up just in case she's dumped.

What it means when we say direct, or if I say direct, it means you are a man and you are there for sex with her.
If you are carrying the persona that you don’t want “friends” she will still assume that’s what you are. Does this make sense? You are carrying “friend/no-friends” micro body language and micro mannerisms. She’s way ahead of you.

Now if you are there for SEX, you should be able to easily dismiss her. She will read THAT.

Are you there for sex or for a girlfriend/wife? She will read that too and default you to friend (stand by dude)

You are operating with the wrong model. How you think is messing you up. A good player is there to fuk every hole she has and she likes the feeling it gives her. She is desired.

You are operating with your programming from birth. And it’s reinforced every day.

Men are dogs
Men are rapists
Men should not want sex from us (we will let you know)
Man is the demise of woman and the patriarchy must fall.

There’s tons of it. It’s ok to insult her and her warped value index. Have fun with it. Go opposite of everything she thinks if you want. Better to polarize her and she thinks you are an a-hole thaN to be her little backup dude as if she’s queen of the universe. LMAO

 

[Spaz]

So I told her I was tired of getting mixed signals and thought we shouldn’t hangout anymore. Of course I got the whole “but I’m just not in a good place for a relationship right now and need a friend”(we were never in a relationship but I knew this meant you get no sex and I keep getting everything I want). So I said “sorry I am not interested in friendship but if you’d like to continue a casual sexual relationship with me I’d be fine with that. Then I got called an ******* and told to F off and I was just like all other guys who just wanted sex.lol I do feel better though.

Smoothly done.

She's just mad that her plan (to keep you as a backup orbiter) backfired.

Now she's got to go through the motions of recruiting one by investing her time and spreading her legs hahaha