"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Girlfriend's Ex wants to take my GF and I out to dinner

christie

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I just countered with it's fine, she wants to tag along with me to a trip I had planned in morocco. Told her we can do dinner or some activity with my EX in morocco. She just left me on read xD
good one!
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Stoic

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It would be foolish to go along with this.

I would just tell her..that's really not how I want to spend my time.

There is nothing good that can come of this.
 

Dash Riprock

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He probably doesn't want to be back with the ex. She probably has him pegged as a "friend" and as a friend and not trying to step on her mans toes he offered to take all of you out to dinner when he's in town. For couples that have opposite sex friends, this is a normal way of seeing a friend without breaking trust.
I'd agree with this. It would be a MUCH bigger flag if she wanted to meet him for dinner without you.

Agree to go and be open and friendly during conversation. If you can, ask him some questions first to establish yourself and the "leader" and go from there. Maintain good eye contact and posture throughout the dinner. Then, when enough time has been spent, YOU state when it's time to go.

I had an ex years ago who was tight with her ex husband. I knew the guy from the gym before I started dating her. He was about as anti-Dash as you can get; big pot smoker, non athletic, sensitive musician, didn't like sports or outdoor activities, on and on. But he was friendly and really funny. I was ok with him coming to our parties, etc.

If you agree to the dinner and take charge of things, all will be good. Tell your gf she will owe you BIG after this; like a threesome with (fill in hot chick name) or she can take you to the Super Bowl.

Good luck.
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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You can go, you just remain postured at all times and keep your interactions very brief, still please and thank you, but 5-6 words and otherwise remain silent. Silence is the answer in times of conflict or anxiety.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I'd agree with this. It would be a MUCH bigger flag if she wanted to meet him for dinner without you.

Agree to go and be open and friendly during conversation. If you can, ask him some questions first to establish yourself and the "leader" and go from there. Maintain good eye contact and posture throughout the dinner. Then, when enough time has been spent, YOU state when it's time to go.

I had an ex years ago who was tight with her ex husband. I knew the guy from the gym before I started dating her. He was about as anti-Dash as you can get; big pot smoker, non athletic, sensitive musician, didn't like sports or outdoor activities, on and on. But he was friendly and really funny. I was ok with him coming to our parties, etc.

If you agree to the dinner and take charge of things, all will be good. Tell your gf she will owe you BIG after this; like a threesome with (fill in hot chick name) or she can take you to the Super Bowl.

Good luck.
True. There is a such thing as real friends. He won't be in competition with you or show envy. He'd be happy for her if she got a good man.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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zinc4

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No you will not look insecure. That's not normal for you to do some fvckin field trips with her ex. It's like your ex wants to hang out with you randomly.
Agree. I have zero desire to meet any strange guy, especially the ex bf of the girl im seeing. Just say no. Who cares if she doesn't like it. The point is you don't like it.
 

flowtheory

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Id first want to know why she is so keen to have the dinner out together?

Because he’s the same guy who still wanted to be involved sexually during that proposed threesome.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Agree. I have zero desire to meet any strange guy, especially the ex bf of the girl im seeing. Just say no. Who cares if she doesn't like it. The point is you don't like it.
If it rub you the wrong way dont do it
 

mrgoodstuff

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He likes her enough to where is willing to tolerate you just to be around her, but he is not the jealous type. I have a few female friends like that.
All females don't require "tolerance " to be around. Some are good to be around.
 

Zontyy

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Id first want to know why she is so keen to have the dinner out together?
I think it boils down to she just wants her daughter's father to play an active role in her life to some degree. Anyways I told her I didn't like the idea of some guy trying to throw shade but I'm okay with dinner and that she would owe me big time. She laughed and said that it wasn't some **** measuring contest and if it were that I won by a long shot in all departments. Nothing in the end happened he never got back to us with his "grand plans" it was more of a forget thing. We were so busy running around and I randomly ran into a cousin and uncle that were in the area. She got mad jealous of my cousin and has always been, just this morning she was accusing me of ****ing my cousin. and said she had bad dreams of all these women texting me and then being in a sex club.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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