Manofrefinedtastes
Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 9, 2017
- Messages
- 28
- Reaction score
- 10
- Age
- 70
Trust, yes. Respect, no.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Girlfriend seems to have "wandering eyes"
- Thread starter randalljohnson
- Start date
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
randalljohnson
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2017
- Messages
- 250
- Reaction score
- 24
- Age
- 36
Hey, all
Here to give an update on my situation. Things have been good as of late. Im still a bit puzzled why I still occasionally see her Liking other guys pictures. I notice her Liking one of her guy "friends" pics (whom I have a feeling she used to sleep with) as well as these 2 other local dudes who I dont think she's even met before. She seems to Like pretty much every selfie they post. And she re-added her former "best friend" who she used to bang, who screwed her over about a year ago. And her re-following one of her exes from a few years ago, also puzzled me. Especially considering his instagram looks barren, he hardly has anything on there. He hasnt posted in a year.
Aside from those insecurities, things seem good lately. She seems to be a bit more "showy" of me. Flaunting me more to the world; posting more about me on fb, uploading pics of us and our kids, etc. I know that she values me. I do alot for her. When she needs something, Im usually there on time to help. That's something that she's very not used to. Her past couple exes didn't do that kind of stuff for her. For example, a couple days ago she got locked out of her apartment and I came over and took out the window so that I could unlock the door for her. She took a pic of me climbing through her window and posted it on fb and praised me for it and said "thank god for him" (lol)
Just recently I noticed her and my mother became friends on facebook. Don't you all view that as a sign of commitment? If she planned on ditching me, why would she be adding my mother? Im not sure if she requested my mother or if my mother requested her. With our kids getting along so well, her adding my mother, etc, arent these signs of commitment?
Here to give an update on my situation. Things have been good as of late. Im still a bit puzzled why I still occasionally see her Liking other guys pictures. I notice her Liking one of her guy "friends" pics (whom I have a feeling she used to sleep with) as well as these 2 other local dudes who I dont think she's even met before. She seems to Like pretty much every selfie they post. And she re-added her former "best friend" who she used to bang, who screwed her over about a year ago. And her re-following one of her exes from a few years ago, also puzzled me. Especially considering his instagram looks barren, he hardly has anything on there. He hasnt posted in a year.
Aside from those insecurities, things seem good lately. She seems to be a bit more "showy" of me. Flaunting me more to the world; posting more about me on fb, uploading pics of us and our kids, etc. I know that she values me. I do alot for her. When she needs something, Im usually there on time to help. That's something that she's very not used to. Her past couple exes didn't do that kind of stuff for her. For example, a couple days ago she got locked out of her apartment and I came over and took out the window so that I could unlock the door for her. She took a pic of me climbing through her window and posted it on fb and praised me for it and said "thank god for him" (lol)
Just recently I noticed her and my mother became friends on facebook. Don't you all view that as a sign of commitment? If she planned on ditching me, why would she be adding my mother? Im not sure if she requested my mother or if my mother requested her. With our kids getting along so well, her adding my mother, etc, arent these signs of commitment?
narcissist
Master Don Juan
A multiplicity of red flags. The sheer amount of red flags that she's displaying is staggering. And when this blows up in your face, it will be your fault for being willingly blind, ignorant, and hopelessly naive.
randalljohnson
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2017
- Messages
- 250
- Reaction score
- 24
- Age
- 36
Are you saying that solely based on my OP or did u read my update I posted today? (One comment above your comment)
narcissist
Master Don Juan
I read it all, knowingly at the potential peril of my personal comfort and good mood. Fortunately, I did not succumb to affective ruin.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
randalljohnson
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2017
- Messages
- 250
- Reaction score
- 24
- Age
- 36
Really?
sazc
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2016
- Messages
- 4,468
- Reaction score
- 3,402
I'm shocked and chagrined and not in a place to comment. OP......Dude....Bottom line is you should be feeling secure, and you are not. That's no bueno.
Loving reading this. OP you should listen, but you only want to defend and justify. Good luck
Loving reading this. OP you should listen, but you only want to defend and justify. Good luck