I was talking to this girl I used to work with the other day. She's cute (HB7-8 at least) so at the end of the convo I said she should give me her number. Without hesitation she gave me her number and then I gave her mine (she said sweet when I gave her mine, lol). Anyway later I found out that she might have a boyfriend. Was she just giving me her number because she thought I wanted to be her friend (never talked to her when we worked together, so we're not friends). Should I just pretend that she doesn't have a bf (I don't know for certain that she has one, it's not like she told me or anything) and just ask her out for a drink. Thanks for your input.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Girl with a boyfriend gave me her number
- Thread starter Kal0051
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
U
user43770
Guest
Inviting her out for drinks sounds like a great idea. If she's committed, she'll decline.
Nutz
Master Don Juan
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slaog said:
WRONG!!!
Don't even bring up the subject. If she's serious with the bf let her bring it up. Otherwise you risk her getting feeling guilty or slutty and "logicing out". You have to maintain appearances so she has plausible deniability.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Yeah, but hanging out and flirting a bit is really messing with someone's woman. Who knows, maybe she's the type that waits around for a better deal to come to her (possibly why she never mentioned her boyfriend). It's not like I'm gonna fvck her on the first meet, I do have some class.slaog said:
sodbuster
Master Don Juan
Women will SAY they have a BF alot more often then they have one. Not sure if they are trying to show preselection or just a way of bailing out if it gets uncomfortable around you.
Prodigy746
Master Don Juan
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why do you think she has a bf?
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
BustedKnucks
Don Juan
Morally, I'd skip on this *****.
Or ask her to hang out, and if I see interest from her, tell her I'm not interested in stealing someone's girl.
It's a low move, even if it's the girl's fault, I wouldn't do that to someone else, even if I thought they sucked.
Besides, when you tell her this, if she is interested, at the next sign of a fight with her bf she will leave him and call you. You are securing a future booty call.
Or ask her to hang out, and if I see interest from her, tell her I'm not interested in stealing someone's girl.
It's a low move, even if it's the girl's fault, I wouldn't do that to someone else, even if I thought they sucked.
Besides, when you tell her this, if she is interested, at the next sign of a fight with her bf she will leave him and call you. You are securing a future booty call.
U
user43770
Guest
BustedKnucks said:
If the girl is gonna cheat, it might as well be with me. You can have the moral high ground.
MisterMcGee
Master Don Juan
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A girl who worked at the same place as me back in the summer had a boyfriend. We chatted it up on facebook a bit and I told her to give me her number because talking over the internet is lame, and she did.
Of course, I'd then call her and talk a bit, and then ask to talk to her sister and proceed to ask her sister out. Bahaha yes I was quite a chump back then.
Of course, I'd then call her and talk a bit, and then ask to talk to her sister and proceed to ask her sister out. Bahaha yes I was quite a chump back then.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
MisterMcGee
Master Don Juan
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I'm saying a chump cause of the way I asked her sister out.Kal0051 said:
Nutz
Master Don Juan
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As much as I hate it when women cheat, the fact of the matter is that he doesn't own her. She's still free to boink whoever she feels like and if the statistics are to be believed most women (and 20% of men) have multiple partners at any given time anyway.slaog said:
TheBucketOfTruth
Master Don Juan
Assume the sale. Don't worry about the boyfriend issue unless it comes up. You can "think" all you want, or pay attention to hearsay, but if you're not sure just proceed as normal for now.