"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Girl who talks about how she's fat even though she isn't...

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
4,476
Reaction score
182
Fishing for compliments and re-assurance.

She will get neither from a DJ.

Next...
 

wjh

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 26, 2004
Messages
998
Reaction score
27
Location
Los Angeles, SFV
KontrollerX said:
Fishing for compliments and re-assurance.

She will get neither from a DJ.

Next...
You would next a girl just because she told you she thought she was overweight?
 

oakraiderz2

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 26, 2002
Messages
4,626
Reaction score
28
Age
40
Location
Colorado
wjh said:
You would next a girl just because she told you she thought she was overweight?
Overly insecure.
 
Joined
May 24, 2008
Messages
49
Reaction score
0
At least it's not a fat girl who thinks she's skinny. Just tell her the truth and it's all in her head and she looks fine.

Or if you feel like being a jerk you could ask her if you should put crisco on the doorway so she can fit through.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

wjh

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 26, 2004
Messages
998
Reaction score
27
Location
Los Angeles, SFV
oakraiderz2 said:
Overly insecure.
Not necessarily. She could be describing AN insecurity, and rest-assured, MOST people have insecurities. She could just feel comfortable enough with him to share it. The question at hand has VERY LITTLE context, and in-and-of itself, a little insecurity over weight issues is not a big deal. The OP may not think she is fat but it's not his call, it's hers. If she wants to lose a few pounds to be happy, that's her prerogative. She may not have known that sharing this bit of info with him would have been so thought-provoking.

Seriously a lot of girls just say they're "fat" even though they know they're not fat, they're just not 100% happy with their bodies and want to continue to work on them.

If anything, to me, it may be an indication that this girl may workout and care about how she looks - unlike fat tubs of lard who think they're hot sh1t when they're obviously not.
 
Joined
May 24, 2008
Messages
49
Reaction score
0
wjh said:
If anything, to me, it may be an indication that this girl may workout and care about how she looks - unlike fat tubs of lard who think they're hot sh1t when they're obviously not.

How about the girls that KNOW they are 30 lbs overweight, and always talk about it like it bothers them. And they always talk about how they want to go to the gym? But they never go to the gym and the only excersize they get is walking into Burger King.

Actually never mind, they use the drive thru.
 

Sir-M

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 17, 2007
Messages
83
Reaction score
0
i have seen a couple of those as well.. the girls are like.. "baby i need to lose weight" and they like weigh 3 kgs..
 

decades

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2004
Messages
1,223
Reaction score
35
Location
sf ca
potentially nutty. :crazy: proceed with caution.
 

mintxx

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
446
Reaction score
9
just give her the dead-eye up and down stare and say 'yeah. you're a fat b!tch.
always nips it in the bud.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Real_Deal

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 4, 2008
Messages
54
Reaction score
1
Location
Michigan
I always have a hard time not making fat jokes when a woman fishes for compliments by saying she's fat.

Nah your not fat just big boned, whale bones apparently!
 

Mavrick

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 1, 2008
Messages
902
Reaction score
43
Beast from the East said:
How about the girls that KNOW they are 30 lbs overweight, and always talk about it like it bothers them. And they always talk about how they want to go to the gym? But they never go to the gym and the only excersize they get is walking into Burger King.

Actually never mind, they use the drive thru.
Back in the day, my ex decided to start exercising at the house with an exercise ball. So, when it was not being used, I put it upstairs. She got mad at me because she had to go up and get it to do her exercise. I looked at her like she was crazy and asked, "you're going to exercise, but going and getting the ball is too much work". Then she started laughing when she realized how absurd she sounded.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
You guys don't know women. Most women are unhappy with their bodies for one reason or another. The majority of that group feel that they are overweight no matter how they look to you or any other guy!!! They aren't crazy, perhaps a bit self conscious for what ever reason. They're women, this is normal. Accept it and give them a "stupid yet happy" supportive guy response and move on.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

L B

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 28, 2004
Messages
526
Reaction score
9
Location
OC
When most girls complain about being fat, they are really complaining about not being tone and fit. They are right. There is a huge difference.

Tell her that you will do cardio with her if she is willing to do weight training with you. Nothing sexier than taking a hot girl to the gym and working out with her.
 

SilverSliver

Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2008
Messages
35
Reaction score
1
Location
MN
I think they are insecure and fishing at the same time. Usually I will ignore he first time, say they look alright the third, and tell them straight out to stop fishing the third time. I May have to drop the "You look fine" part though. Last chick I did that too was 145 or so should have weighed 120-125. Before I knew it she said she was 169! Tempted to say "If you think so then do something about it, wy are you telling me?"
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
L B said:
...Tell her that you will do cardio with her if she is willing to do weight training with you. Nothing sexier than taking a hot girl to the gym and working out with her.
So you're saying that you should agree with her in saying that you think she's fat too and she should work out with you? Plan on getting any from her anytime soon?
 

FL2008

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
i tell her she is just to piss her off. i've had before a girlfriend before who did progressively gain weight and asked me that riddiculous question. like an idiot i told her no, but in the future i will just tell her she is getting fat because if you don't, they turn into pigs.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Top