I've been chatting with a girl on Okcupid. We had talked about meeting up for coffee today but she couldn't bc she has to work but she said she was off tuesday. So I said that's cool, we can tuesday then. Well that was 2 days ago and she hasn't sent anything back yet. I don't know if i should message her or not. I didn't try to get her number yet bc some people on here said it would be better to set up the date first and then get the number. So what should I do? Any help would be great.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Girl starting to flake
- Thread starter adamw5963
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
My rules on OKC:
1. Establish contact right away with a message that puts yourself above the rest. I tend towards really ridiculous and hilarious with obvious flirting. Do what works for you.
2. Send 1-2 messages back and forth. Keep it short, aloof and tons of joking around and flirting. Get the number.
3. Text her one time to establish contact and let her know it's you. After she responds set up the date.
The timeframe is irrelevant as it will depend on response time from her, but you should keep your response time about the same as hers. Follow the above steps and you'll see better results. On OKC you have to move fast, as soon as you put yourself above the rest take advantage of the situation; girls' interest declines insanely fast over OKC because of the fact that they're reading words on a computer screen. Get them in person ASAP and you'll be more successful.
Regarding this situation specifically, she sounds like a lost cause. I'd quit wasting my time if I were you.
1. Establish contact right away with a message that puts yourself above the rest. I tend towards really ridiculous and hilarious with obvious flirting. Do what works for you.
2. Send 1-2 messages back and forth. Keep it short, aloof and tons of joking around and flirting. Get the number.
3. Text her one time to establish contact and let her know it's you. After she responds set up the date.
The timeframe is irrelevant as it will depend on response time from her, but you should keep your response time about the same as hers. Follow the above steps and you'll see better results. On OKC you have to move fast, as soon as you put yourself above the rest take advantage of the situation; girls' interest declines insanely fast over OKC because of the fact that they're reading words on a computer screen. Get them in person ASAP and you'll be more successful.
Regarding this situation specifically, she sounds like a lost cause. I'd quit wasting my time if I were you.
Come up with your own, I'm not here to pick up girls for you. Just say something ridiculous and stupid that touches on a random fact in her profile, throw in a flirty stupid line and make sure you have correct punctuation and you're above probably every single guy she receives messages from.adamw5963 said:
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
nismo-4
Moderator
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2005
- Messages
- 4,438
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Simple case for Judge nismo.
In your case, don't wait around for her. Your princess is in another castle. Accept this, move on, and remember for next time to get the girl off the net quickly. When you call, set up the date, and be busy. You need not linger on the phone. Keep a sense of mystery. You are hereby ordered to learn from this mistake, understand that all girls can flake, and come up with a battle plan for your sake. Spin more plates always. :yes: That's my verdict.
Case closed.
In your case, don't wait around for her. Your princess is in another castle. Accept this, move on, and remember for next time to get the girl off the net quickly. When you call, set up the date, and be busy. You need not linger on the phone. Keep a sense of mystery. You are hereby ordered to learn from this mistake, understand that all girls can flake, and come up with a battle plan for your sake. Spin more plates always. :yes: That's my verdict.
Case closed.
cuffs.allister
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2011
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- 25
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- 0
Lmao I like how Nismo put it in.