"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Girl on facebook

S

styleman

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Got chatting with this girl over facebook, seems to be going quite well, playing her hot and cold, and she seems interested.
It's just that the conversation seems to run a bit dry at times as its over instant messaging rather than in person.
It's still a bit early to ask her out, any tips on how to keep the conversation flowing freely?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

M

Mr_rogers

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styleman said:
Got chatting with this girl over facebook, seems to be going quite well, playing her hot and cold, and she seems interested.
It's just that the conversation seems to run a bit dry at times as its over instant messaging rather than in person.
It's still a bit early to ask her out, any tips on how to keep the conversation flowing freely?
Click to expand...
You should probably try to keep online communication short. I know it's difficult, but a great time to cut it short is when she's enjoying herself most. Tell her that you need to go and meet some friends, were called in to work, whatever. The important part is that you leave her wanting more, which'll raise her interest level.

Save the longer conversations for once you meet in person (which you should ask to do sooner rather than later).
 
R

Rounder

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Why not just say "Chatting online is ok - I'd rather talk in person though - we should get together for a drink/coffee"

If it's just some girl on Facebook why not roll the dice? If you're going to meet at a public place what's the big deal?
 
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Mr Autobahn

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Yeah, always meet someone in a public place but set conditions... keep in short in case she doesn't meet your expectations...
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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styleman

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Well sure, but its really far too early to ask her out.
Randomly added her due to a few mutual friends, just chatted with her once...
What are good things to talk about??
 
A

Asteconn

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styleman said:
Well sure, but its really far too early to ask her out.
Randomly added her due to a few mutual friends, just chatted with her once...
What are good things to talk about??
Click to expand...
Her.

Always her.

If the topic of conversation moves away from her onto you; reflect it back at her.
 
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