Getting over the party stage

[skinnyguy]

This is for guys 30+.

When did you stop going out to bars/clubs, and do you miss it?

I am not going out that much anymore and I feel like I am not missing anything. The club scene is pretty vapid.

 

[El Suave]

I stopped when I realized that it's full of AW and dumb chicks. Very easy to score, never asked for a number, but banged them the same night. I always knew that it's not the scene for me and only go if I need a quick lay that night and that's it.

You will not find quality at a bar. That's how I see it and treat them as such. I'm old school and have no respect for a woman in a bar plus I'm not originally from the US. A good woman would be at home learning how to cook, clean, educate herself in how to raise kids and so on.

 

[GotED?]

I don't drink, and when I used to go to clubs it was because I really loved the 80's (NIN, DM, PetshopBoys, Frontline Assembly) and just wanted to dance. 'Alternative Clubs' allowed that as you can dance alone.

I have been much more reserved in life so not much help here. I have always thought women in clubs were trash regardless. I haven't been in a club since my mid-20's and now I am 41.

I would love to go back, only for the music, dancing, and nostalgia.

 

[Mike32ct]

This is for guys 30+.

When did you stop going out to bars/clubs, and do you miss it?

I am not going out that much anymore and I feel like I am not missing anything. The club scene is pretty vapid.

I was VERY active in the bar/club scene from 27 to 34. Then, I started to taper it off. I would go out one a month or so until 37. Now, I'm a hermit who hides at home except for work, dance classes, and vacations. I don't really bother with women much at all anymore except on a professional or classroom sort of level.

The number one reason I left the bar/club scene was fear of continued long term hearing damage. These places are just too damn loud. I still love club music even as an older guy, but I listen to it at home. Even bars with music are really loud. The theory is it sells more drinks. Workplaces have noise regulations to protect hearing. But somehow bars, clubs, and concerts do not. But that's another topic...

I also got sick of the AWing and cliquey social circle groups that stay together and don't talk to anyone else.

I love to dance and have gotten MUCH better at it in recent years with some training, but I'm sick of seeing women dance together in groups instead of with men. I have some cool moves now, but a bar/club lady wouldn't give me the right time of day anymore so I can't use them there. A hot guy who sways from left to right >>>> an average looking guy with cool moves in the bar/club scene.

So, I just do formal dancing at the ballroom studio and some local dance events. Of course I sometimes miss the grinding and makeouts from the club lol, but it is what it is.

 

[yyc12]

So, I just do formal dancing at the ballroom studio and some local dance events. Of course I sometimes miss the grinding and makeouts from the club lol, but it is what it is.

That's the better way to go by far (for me its salsa). I keep kicking myself for wasting all those yrs in the "club scene" instead of learning proper dancing and meeting more sensible (slightly, lol) women that way.

 

[skinnyguy]

That's the better way to go by far (for me its salsa). I keep kicking myself for wasting all those yrs in the "club scene" instead of learning proper dancing and meeting more sensible (slightly, lol) women that way.

It's not that they are better women per se. It's that you aren't meeting them in under the influence of alcohol in a dark, loud club when they have their bish shields up. It's the venue that ruins it.

 

[Yo'Mama]

I agree with all the negative comments about clubs. I still like rolling out solo , getting smashed and talking to random people from time to time. It's just entertainment for me but I've stopped doing it so much because of the post alcohol hangover and depression which can last for two or three days.

I'm a big 80's music fan so probably will limit clubs to 80's nights (also hopefully they will have older crowds, I've no interest in trying to party with a bunch of 20 year olds).

 

[Jaylan]

Im glad you mentioned this. As a musician and lover of music, I am a BIG advocate of protecting one's hearing. There are 2 big reasons why so many folks under 50 are having hearing issues nowadays.

1. Youthful ignorance is a big factor. When I was younger and stupider in my teens and early 20s, Id blast my headphones, play loud band practices, and play even louder live shows. Then one day during practice, my ears started rustling. When certain noises were loud enough, or when certain frequencies came into contact with me, my left ear would sound like someone was crinkling a candy wrapper next to it. It was like static.

I eventually found out I have stapedial myoclonus, along with a mild case of tinnitus. The myoclonus is basically the spasming of the stapedius muscle in my ear. And my tinnitus is a faint rining in my ears, for those who arent familiar with it. Its basically that ringing you get after being somewhere loud, except its permanent. Luckily my tinnitus isnt loud, and I really only notice it in dead quiet environments.

I now wear custom musicians earplugs when I go to ANY loud place. Basically, if I have to yell in someones ear to talk to them, I know I should wear my earplugs at that place. I got my plugs half price a few years ago in my senior year at college, thanks to the student discount the audiology department at school offerent. I also carry extra foam plugs to give to people, or to use myself if I want stronger protection than my customs.

The big problem is that half the time, young people my age ignore what I tell them about this hearing damage, and that they can end up with very loud and permanent tinnitus. People have gone through depression and suicide because the ringing for them is too loud. I got lucky. And heck, nowadays my myoclonus is like a warning. If I get the static in my ears from the inner ear muscle spasm, I know to wear plugs or leave the area.

2. Many musicians, sound engineers, producers, etc are VERY VERY irresposible when it comes to putting on shows for people at a venue. Many believe louder is better. My Bloody Valentine is known for doing this dangerous crap called the wall of sound. They basically assault their fans with deafening sound, and even with earplugs people have complained of hearing problems afterwards. I know people want to "feel" the music in their chest, but too loud is not healthy and sometimes earplugs dont help if the decibels get out of hand.

Some of the best music I have seen has been of moderate sound level, that didnt assault my ears, and was even across high, mid, and low tones. Too many sound guys and bands dont know how to equalize their music. And many times guitarists and other musicians in the upper register want to turn their volume up too much over the lower register instruments. High frequency hearing lost is the first thing to go when it comes to ear damage.

So basically, I emplore ALL people to take care of their ears and educate others if you can. Turn down the car stereo, turn down the ipod, learn how to properly level music if you play out like, and wear earplugs when its too loud.

I was VERY active in the bar/club scene from 27 to 34. Then, I started to taper it off. I would go out one a month or so until 37. Now, I'm a hermit who hides at home except for work, dance classes, and vacations. I don't really bother with women much at all anymore except on a professional or classroom sort of level.

The number one reason I left the bar/club scene was fear of continued long term hearing damage. These places are just too damn loud. I still love club music even as an older guy, but I listen to it at home. Even bars with music are really loud. The theory is it sells more drinks. Workplaces have noise regulations to protect hearing. But somehow bars, clubs, and concerts do not. But that's another topic...

I also got sick of the AWing and cliquey social circle groups that stay together and don't talk to anyone else.

I love to dance and have gotten MUCH better at it in recent years with some training, but I'm sick of seeing women dance together in groups instead of with men. I have some cool moves now, but a bar/club lady wouldn't give me the right time of day anymore so I can't use them there. A hot guy who sways from left to right >>>> an average looking guy with cool moves in the bar/club scene.

So, I just do formal dancing at the ballroom studio and some local dance events. Of course I sometimes miss the grinding and makeouts from the club lol, but it is what it is.

 

[IHeartTrance]

...

 

[gravityeyelids]

A good woman would be at home learning how to cook, clean, educate herself in how to raise kids and so on.

Lol.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

I got tinnitus in my right ear....sucks happened in september last year. I don't use headphones often went to the doctor and everything. I am use to it now. Like you when its dead quiet I hear the rininging when its quiet to. I will find a way to cure it though

 

[backbreaker]

I stopped going to clubs when i realized it was a rip off lol.


it's gaming for the lazy man. think about it. if you locked yourself in a room with a notepad for 3 hours you could come up with 20-30 better places to game women, easily. clubs are for guys who put no original thought into their game.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

I stopped going to clubs when i realized it was a rip off lol.


it's gaming for the lazy man. think about it. if you locked yourself in a room with a notepad for 3 hours you could come up with 20-30 better places to game women, easily. clubs are for guys who put no original thought into their game.

where else do I go lol

 

[Peterpack]

I don't go out as much as i used to but i still enjoy going out now and then. And when in a different city i always go out.

Even though i am older than most clubbers, i still look young enough to not be out of place and still get attention from girls of all ages. When that changes, i will probably really slow things down

 

[Harry Wilmington]

To be honest, I never really went to clubs as a way of hitting on women or getting with long-term prospects. I was shy as a kid/teenager and it also takes me a minute to become comfortable with people I'm meeting for the first time. So, for me, while I did do a lot of clubbing in my mid-to-late 20s, it was mostly because friends of mine were going and I felt like dancing. Yes, I actually danced at clubs - which, ironically, would usually result in me dancing with and/or flirting with the hottest chick in the place for most of the night. Learn to dance, fellas!

Anyway... I stopped doing the whole "clubbing" thing when I realized I had a much better chance of scoring with chicks at house parties. In my late 20s I was living in a 3-bedroom apartment with 2 friends of mine, and either we would be throwing a house party every weekend or one of our friends would be, and I learned really quickly how to score at these parties. Because I was already in a comfortable environment it made it easier for me to talk to people, including women I was meeting for the first time. Lots of action, a few good lays, and the realization that if you bring the club to your house, there's no need to go out, lol