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Getting over oneitis

user252009

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What would you recommend to someone that is hung upon a girl that's not actively responding to hang/go out, and is also pretty introverted, without a real desire to go outside and look for other women?
 

Reservoir Dog

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Find a hobby. Preferably one that will make you money down the line.
EG:
Guitar
Writing
Stocks/shares
etc
 

Visionist

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Masturbate. Post Nut Clarity will reveal if you really like her.
 

stringpuller

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What would you recommend to someone that is hung upon a girl that's not actively responding to hang/go out, and is also pretty introverted, without a real desire to go outside and look for other women?
Other girls. Options. Deep seated desire to put you first
 

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GioWolf

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I'm a former introvert myself, and it's because of approval seeking behavior. I wasn't outgoing or speaking my mind because I didn't want to say something that would change someones opinion of me. Lifting weights and getting strong immensely helped me become outgoing. When you can deadlift 300 lbs, you stop caring what others think of you. Also when you look fit, you get away with a lot more. Women don't like to be bored and loath men that aren't confident. Introverted guys are boring and lack confidence. Stop seeking approval, do things to get yourself out of your comfort zone. Hit the gym.
 

user252009

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I'm a former introvert myself, and it's because of approval seeking behavior. I wasn't outgoing or speaking my mind because I didn't want to say something that would change someones opinion of me. Lifting weights and getting strong immensely helped me become outgoing. When you can deadlift 300 lbs, you stop caring what others think of you. Also when you look fit, you get away with a lot more. Women don't like to be bored and loath men that aren't confident. Introverted guys are boring and lack confidence. Stop seeking approval, do things to get yourself out of your comfort zone. Hit the gym.
I work out, but not sure how that will help me get over a girl
 

user252009

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Do you have any mates? Would they like to bang her?

You could say hi me and my friends would like to double team or triple team you.
Trying to have a civilised discussion here, one that these kinds of replies fail to contribute to
 

Reservoir Dog

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YOu can do this bro.

If she is in your mind, that is by your choice.

You can choose to get her out of your mind.

It's hard work, but it really is your decision.

That is free will.

Decide now what you are free to focus on. And focus on it.

Go watch a good film for a couple of hours as an example.
 

user252009

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YOu can do this bro.

If she is in your mind, that is by your choice.

You can choose to get her out of your mind.

It's hard work, but it really is your decision.

That is free will.

Decide now what you are free to focus on. And focus on it.

Go watch a good film for a couple of hours as an example.
The problem is, I see her on a regular basis
 

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user252009

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Oh.
in what capacity?
Work. And yes I know, don't **** where you eat and all that, but it's a very liberal place with many couples and married couples working there, so that's not the problem. Problem is attraction is there and it's not going away
 

Reservoir Dog

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Work. And yes I know, don't **** where you eat and all that, but it's a very liberal place with many couples and married couples working there, so that's not the problem. Problem is attraction is there and it's not going away
Ok Broski. I can definitely help you out here.

Had the same situation a few years ago (9 to be exact).

Me and this girl worked together. Hit it off something fantastic. She had a boyfriend and I wasn't at all interested in her.

But then...somewhere down the line, we had this connection. We were flirting and things were getting kinda serious.

That's when it all f****d up. I started seeing her in a different light. Like I was attracted to her. That was when it was game over.

Gone was my flirty ways.

Suddenly, I was chasing her.

And the more I was chasing her, the less she was interested.

Soon the whole damn office knew about it.

The more I said, the bigger the grave I dug for myself, but I did not know how to get myself out of it.

Then I came on this site.

Learnt to shut my mouth.

Don't talk to anyone about this.

Soon enough she left the department and that was that.

Those who knew her, also left and it all faded into memories.

Time really does heal.

I know how tough this is.

But you just have to stick it out if she knows how you feel and she is not responding.

Really the worst part was what others thought of me.

I felt like a laughing stock.
 

user252009

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Ok Broski. I can definitely help you out here.

Had the same situation a few years ago (9 to be exact).

Me and this girl worked together. Hit it off something fantastic. She had a boyfriend and I wasn't at all interested in her.

But then...somewhere down the line, we had this connection. We were flirting and things were getting kinda serious.

That's when it all f****d up. I started seeing her in a different light. Like I was attracted to her. That was when it was game over.

Gone was my flirty ways.

Suddenly, I was chasing her.

And the more I was chasing her, the less she was interested.

Soon the whole damn office knew about it.

The more I said, the bigger the grave I dug for myself, but I did not know how to get myself out of it.

Then I came on this site.

Learnt to shut my mouth.

Don't talk to anyone about this.

Soon enough she left the department and that was that.

Those who knew her, also left and it all faded into memories.

Time really does heal.

I know how tough this is.

But you just have to stick it out if she knows how you feel and she is not responding.

Really the worst part was what others thought of me.

I felt like a laughing stock.
Sorry you went through that! I haven't been chasing her much, it's occasional back and forth, I always leave the ball in her court, and she always hits me up after some time. Nothing flirty, just catching up, but I keep it short, as I suggested we hang out a few times, and we did once, but not since then, we still talk though.
 

Reservoir Dog

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Sorry you went through that! I haven't been chasing her much, it's occasional back and forth, I always leave the ball in her court, and she always hits me up after some time. Nothing flirty, just catching up, but I keep it short, as I suggested we hang out a few times, and we did once, but not since then, we still talk though.
Oh ok.

What exactly are you saying? And what are her responses?
 
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