"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

From jerk to afc

phillies

Banned
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
266
Reaction score
83
Had a rough relationship with highs and lows. ok looking chinese girl, love together for 2 years, i have a bit of a substance abuse problem. she signed the lease of a new place a month before she left and didnt tell me.

When she seemed indifferent and distant more and more, stopped complaining, i began supplicating.i was started off pretty alpha. When she became distant i began to supplicate more, do little favors all the time to try and make her feel better. It felt like she stopped behaving like a girlfriend, but i kept behaving like a boyfriend.

this so slowly pushed me into a depression( Or I let it), i had asked what was wrong twice. I would get mad somtimes. I got more and more insecure, and it felt like she got more secure.

the last week she acted real sad, and cut off. We lived togther for two years. I ended up quiting my job during this time, I was so stressed didnt know what to do. she respected me a lot for like the first 1 2/3. everything went down hill fast the last 1/3. something were m fault I drank to much and smoked to much pot, i also put less money into the relationship. I promised her i would go to college so we could have a life and family.

When she left I had no friends, I was drinking a lot, i stopped about a week before she left. When she left she moved into a house with a couple other girls, so she had a social circle right away, we spent most our time togather.

I went soft, stuck in a relationship grave yard, never really got to know to many people in Cincinnati except work friends. I chased for like 2 months. She ignored me a lot, kept in touch for a bit, came over an sucked my **** once and left right away. She told me at one point on skype about a party, the next day she said she made out with some senior from notre dame. I started to drink all the time, every day, no job. I broke.

prior to the break up i was addicted to benzos, on antiderpessants. The relationship had a lot of pressure, i went to these extents, the wrong way though. I was so caught up in the relationship i lost myself.

Shes not even that good lookings, shes educated well, studies finance, nice body, but face isnt the best, its not horrible either. She was always kind of nice and polite, she used to look up to me so so so much. I went from alpha traits, to jerk, back and forth on those and eventually afc started to peak its ugly face, and it consumed.
 
Last edited:

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

phillies

Banned
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
266
Reaction score
83
I feel like she would play mind games a lot also, when she got mad usually she would give me the silent treatment, rarely would she say what shes mad about. So somtimes i think i didnt notice if she was giving the silent treatment.
 
Last edited:

Atom Smasher

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2008
Messages
8,657
Reaction score
6,614
Age
69
Location
The 7th Dimension
OP, edit your post into small paragraphs and people will read it.
 

phillies

Banned
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
266
Reaction score
83
It was rare for her to get mad, its was a cultural thing i think, she would give me the silent treatment, and i would get mad sometimes.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Atom Smasher

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2008
Messages
8,657
Reaction score
6,614
Age
69
Location
The 7th Dimension
There's not a lot to say here. She checked out of the relationship long before she signed that lease. I'm sure you know that.

You've got to get a handle on the booze drugs. She lost respect for you because you demonstrated a lack of respect for yourself.

I always advise men to avoid living with a woman. It's a play marriage and statistics show that couple who lived together prior to marriage are way more prone to divorce than those who have not. I have also observed that living with a woman tends to amplify and accelerate the inner AFC's re-emergence.

Charge it to the game and get yourself back into life. I just realized that instead of breaking your OP into paragraphs you re-wrote a small portion.

You need to get your life on track. Read "The Magic Story", internalize it and apply it to your life:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=155403&highlight=magic+story
 

phillies

Banned
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
266
Reaction score
83
Thanks man. I think the benzos and anti depressants, i went off them right before, got on a different one, and i was drinking like a 5th a day over christmas, the substance abuse has prolonged my pain, it wasnt me at all. Its been 7 months. Yup i think thats messed up also. I chased right away, and never even gave her a chance to come back and stroke her ego, i kept trying. i feel so disgusted with myself.
 

phillies

Banned
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
266
Reaction score
83
It just kills me inside sometimes, she was a very conservative girl, she gave me everything. she trusted me.
 

phillies

Banned
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
266
Reaction score
83
She was very committed, i showed so much strength a lot of times. I hope when i internalize game well, she will see how well I can do with out her.
 

phillies

Banned
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
266
Reaction score
83
I was in school for electrical engineering, I was doing well for a while. I feel like the pressure of the relationship took a toll on this respect. Well today i got some side work, im bouncing at a bar. my brother works there, I think ill get free drinks all day. Lot of women. my life has got better, i have a place back home, a job. Ive quite the drugs, a few brushes with booz, but i keep in to a minimum. my plan is to get back into school, and save money, and constantly look for a better job. But i still have no completely shaken this **** yet, i feel like im so close, yet the pain lingers.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

Top