"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Friday Fvckery: Facebook Statuses that AREN'T a good look.

N

Naughty Ninja

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Time for some more Ninja Friday Fvckery kids!

For those of you who actually use or care to use Facebook if you have one..

What are some Facebook Statuses that aren't a "Good Look"?

Something cringeworthy, pathetic etc. (Yes I know for the most part they all aren't a good look) but something you've seen on a friends wall or something you've ever posted.

IE: Foreveralone
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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sageproduct

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More positive energy!! Ignore all negative ones! :) Be happy happy happy! As much happy as u can! :) beautiful day! Million reasons to smile!
 
N

nroug7

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I don't know about bad statuses, because this is the kind of stuff I post

"So I was shopping at IGA when I saw these Cherry Ripe chocolate bars with the most ridiculous wrappers, for example - "you're sweet" and "I love you xoxo"
Nobody wants to see that sh1t, seriously, design some damn realistic wrappers, have that sh1t read
"Where's my sandwich at b1tch."
Or
"I saw you cheatin on me with some other nigga!"
And if that's not good enough, hashtag that sh1t up yo.
"#you missed our date last night motherfugga.""
 
B

BeDJ

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Comment Fat Chick Photo Trick on a chubby girl's picture.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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N

nroug7

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BeginningDJ said:
Comment Fat Chick Photo Trick on a chubby girl's picture.
Click to expand...
That would be hilarious.
Facebook is my comedy portal.
:crackup:
 
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