FR: Give them what they need and good things happen...Thanks Guru!!

[BackInTheGame78]

OK, had a date last night with a solid HB 9. Hottest woman I've ever gone out with. Completely gorgeous. I think we actually forged somewhat of an emotional connection before we met and I set myself up as something different from her normal. She had some rough experiences in the past---with guys, her family life and her life experiences. Now, some might say she is "broken". Maybe she is. But I saw something else. I saw strength. Strength to keep getting up when life kept kicking her down. From what we talked about I could tell she was needing love. So I gave her what she needed when we met.

I picked her up at her house, which was about a half hour drive away. I could tell immediately that she was nervous, which was a good thing in my eyes. She even admitted it once we got to the bar. We get there and she opens a tab, without me saying a word...she is invested. I took her hands in mine, and told her to relax and don't be nervous, that we are going to have a great time together and I looked deeply into her eyes. She was giving me the puppy dog eyes. I knew I was on the right path.

The date continues, lots of kino mostly initiated by her, she started opening up to me about things that happened, I listened, didn't judge her and commented about how "that must have been rough on her", etc and she opened up even further. About 15 minutes in she was giving me "that look". So I just stopped talking, leaned in, stroked her hair and told her how soft it looked and she leaned forward and kissed me. Several times.

After moving from inside to outside and back inside to the bar and then a booth, we end up leaving and going for a walk around the downtown area of her town. There were some cool things there, held hands a good part of the time, grabbing her butt, spanked her a few times cause it was her birthday a few days priors and I promised her some birthday spankings when I saw her.

End up driving back to her place and there is a factory that makes cinnamon things and the whole area smelled like cinnamon. Walked closer to it, I picked her up in the air and she grinded on me, got back to her place, leaned on the car and she came and sat her pvssy directly on my c0ck, so I could feel its warmness as she rubbed me up and down. Unfortunately she is temporarily staying with her Mom since she just moved back to the area a few months ago and her place wasn't available, or else I likely would have banged her. Learned from the previous date that it might be wise to show sexual intent but not push too far if you don't have anywhere else other than a car as it might make you come off the wrong way...

I left and 5 minutes after she texts me "Drive safely. I hope to hear from you soon " Didn't reply.

About 2 hours ago got another text from her saying "Good afternoon! What are you doing? Did I scare you off??"

I replied about an hour later "Nope. If that was your plan you failed."

After a few brief text exchanges she says "I was going to ask you to come visit me today, but its late and you are probably busy."

Told her today and this weekend is rough but we could make something happen early next week one day and that I think she is really cool and I definitely wanted to see her again.

Felt pretty good that I analyzed the situation, responded properly, both prior to and in-date and gave her what she needed. And she is pretty into me at this point. Thanks Guru, took me a little while to calibrate but I did a much better job on this one...with a much hotter woman, no less.

My question is this Guru: She seems to need extra reassurance and might be a little needy from what I'm sensing. Do I go ghost for a few days and then hit her up like Sunday night and make plans or does she need something extra? I know you said attraction amplifies when time passes so I'm thinking I should let it go for a few days...what to do if she texts me daily in the meantime?

 

[Desdinova]

My question is this Guru: She seems to need extra reassurance and might be a little needy from what I'm sensing. Do I go ghost for a few days and then hit her up like Sunday night and make plans or does she need something extra? I know you said attraction amplifies when time passes so I'm thinking I should let it go for a few days...what to do if she texts me daily in the meantime?

I'm not Guru, but this is an open forum, so I'm gonna be an a55hole and chime in anyway.

With any new prospect, strike while the iron is hot. A woman's interest is volatile in the beginning, so you need to keep it high until it becomes stable. You CANNOT keep a woman's interest high when you disappear. See her again ASAP.

She had some rough experiences in the past---with guys, her family life and her life experiences. Now, some might say she is "broken". Maybe she is. But I saw something else. I saw strength.

Oh fvck off. It's not strength. That's what women want you to believe when they go through a bunch of 5hit. Women are tin boxes full of emotions. This one has a bunch of dents in her. Tin boxes don't get stronger when you beat the 5hit out of them.

 

[guru1000]

Yup. Once you reach the epitome of “game,” you recognize one rudimentary truth: There is no game. There is only what she WANTS, and what you PROVIDE. In this case, the prospect wanted love and support, and that is exactly what you provided her with. THUS, you establish the apocryphal EMOTIONAL CONNECTION she so desperately craves, which in its simplest terms means: NOW you can do ANYTHING you want as long you continue to APPEAR congruent with her what she needs.

My comments follow:

OK, had a date last night with a solid HB 9. Hottest woman I've ever gone out with. Completely gorgeous.

Excellent! You previously gave FRs with 7s, and now out of the blue, here comes a 9. The irony is that it is not much more difficult with a 9 than a 7, huh. I would even go further to state that I do better with 9s than 7s. Perhaps, I relate better. But certainly, the ladder theory falls flat on its face once realize that whether a 7 or a 9, a girl is a girl subject to identical biological and emotional impetuses.

I think we actually forged somewhat of an emotional connection before we met and I set myself up as something different from her normal.

This is powerful, and a component of advanced “Game.” If you have the time and patience, you get the hard work out of the way by forging an emotional connection with the prospect before you meet. If done correctly, she will feel like she is in love before she even meets you!

She had some rough experiences in the past---with guys, her family life and her life experiences. Now, some might say she is "broken". Maybe she is. But I saw something else. I saw strength. Strength to keep getting up when life kept kicking her down. From what we talked about I could tell she was needing love. So I gave her what she needed when we met.

The “strength” pitch is powerful. I use the following:

“You seem like you been through a lot. I can tell. But you know this tells me. That you are strong. Because what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, right? These life experiences happen for a reason. There are no bad events. Only interpretations of what these events mean to us, right? And I can tell that you take everything in good stride. I can also tell you are a seasoned, mature, learned woman as a result. That is f’ckn incredible. I like that!”

Then follow up with love a/k/a beta throws.

I picked her up at her house, which was about a half hour drive away. I could tell immediately that she was nervous, which was a good thing in my eyes. She even admitted it once we got to the bar. We get there and she opens a tab, without me saying a word...she is invested. I took her hands in mine, and told her to relax and don't be nervous, that we are going to have a great time together and I looked deeply into her eyes. She was giving me the puppy dog eyes. I knew I was on the right path

Very smooth.

The date continues, lots of kino mostly initiated by her, she started opening up to me about things that happened, I listened, didn't judge her and commented about how "that must have been rough on her", etc and she opened up even further.

Hook, line, and sinker.

About 15 minutes in she was giving me "that look". So I just stopped talking, leaned in, stroked her hair and told her how soft it looked and she leaned forward and kissed me. Several times.

After moving from inside to outside and back inside to the bar and then a booth, we end up leaving and going for a walk around the downtown area of her town. There were some cool things there, held hands a good part of the time, grabbing her butt, spanked her a few times cause it was her birthday a few days priors and I promised her some birthday spankings when I saw her.

End up driving back to her place and there is a factory that makes cinnamon things and the whole area smelled like cinnamon. Walked closer to it, I picked her up in the air and she grinded on me, got back to her place, leaned on the car and she came and sat her pvssy directly on my c0ck, so I could feel its warmness as she rubbed me up and down. Unfortunately she is temporarily staying with her Mom since she just moved back to the area a few months ago and her place wasn't available, or else I likely would have banged her. Learned from the previous date that it might be wise to show sexual intent but not push too far if you don't have anywhere else other than a car as it might make you come off the wrong way...

Escalation was good. You gauged your prospect and acted accordingly. You need to work out logistics with a secondary place if you can.

I left and 5 minutes after she texts me "Drive safely. I hope to hear from you soon " Didn't reply.

About 2 hours ago got another text from her saying "Good afternoon! What are you doing? Did I scare you off??"

I replied about an hour later "Nope. If that was your plan you failed."

After a few brief text exchanges she says "I was going to ask you to come visit me today, but its late and you are probably busy."

She reached out to you so you can ask her out again. Here you should have responded with: “I had a great time. You’re an awesome girl. Def like to see you again. Can't do today, but when are you free next week to get together, Thursday?”

Told her today and this weekend is rough but we could make something happen early next week one day and that I think she is really cool and I definitely wanted to see her again.

Felt pretty good that I analyzed the situation, responded properly, both prior to and in-date and gave her what she needed. And she is pretty into me at this point. Thanks Guru, took me a little while to calibrate but I did a much better job on this one...with a much hotter woman, no less.

My question is this Guru: She seems to need extra reassurance and might be a little needy from what I'm sensing. Do I go ghost for a few days and then hit her up like Sunday night and make plans or does she need something extra? I know you said attraction amplifies when time passes so I'm thinking I should let it go for a few days...what to do if she texts me daily in the meantime?

Desi hit it. Strike when the iron is hot. You should have countered her date-offer with a specific day and time. So text/call her tomorrow and schedule a definite day and time to meet. When you arrange, end with “OK great! I will reach out to you and see you Thursday. I look forward to seeing you. Don’t forget!”

You are not operating on probation like your previous FR. You did everything right this time. So after you set the date, no need to reach out to her again until the date. She will remember you. You left a mark.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

She reached out to you so you can ask her out again. Here you should have responded with: “I had a great time. You’re an awesome girl. Def like to see you again. Can't do today, but when are you free next week to get together, Thursday?”


Desi hit it. Strike when the iron is hot. You should have countered her date-offer with a specific day and time. So text/call her tomorrow and schedule a definite day and time to meet. When you arrange, end with “OK great! I will reach out to you and see you Thursday. I look forward to seeing you. Don’t forget!”

You are not operating on probation like your previous FR. You did everything right this time. So after you set the date, no need to reach out to her again until the date. She will remember you. You left a mark.

I will call her tomorrow and give her the whole "I was just thinking about you and I wanted to hear your voice..." small talk for a few minutes and then ask her out.

She even told me she rearranged her work schedule so she doesn't work past 7 pm now so she can see me more often(she was working til 10 pm before). She told me she is "staying positive and making an effort". The whole staying positive thing was what she said before meeting that she was "staying positive" about me since the other guys hadn't worked out.

I must have made quite the impression on her I guess...

I have a feeling this could burn intense and hot for a while, like her wanting to see me every day, but ultimately fizzle out, which is what I'm trying to avoid, although that might not be possible I suppose.

 

[Lozboss]

Why don't you two PM each other?

This is just an e-circle jerk

 

[guru1000]

Come on Lozboss, you're our favorite contributor. Tell me you haven't picked up anything from these threads.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

I will call her tomorrow and give her the whole "I was just thinking about you and I wanted to hear your voice..." small talk for a few minutes and then ask her out.

Thus far you've done everything GREAT, actually... with that said - and I'm happy to hear other's thoughts on this - it may be too early to go with the whole "I was just thinking about you and I wanted to hear your voice" bit. Yes, you want her to know you like her, but this just SCREAMS "you've already got me," and she still needs to feel like she doesn't have you yet on this level. I usually reserve these kinds of comment for after I've been dating a girl for two months - by that time, we've gone out enough to where she's earned the right to hear a comment like this.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Thus far you've done everything GREAT, actually... with that said - and I'm happy to hear other's thoughts on this - it may be too early to go with the whole "I was just thinking about you and I wanted to hear your voice" bit. Yes, you want her to know you like her, but this just SCREAMS "you've already got me," and she still needs to feel like she doesn't have you yet on this level. I usually reserve these kinds of comment for after I've been dating a girl for two months - by that time, we've gone out enough to where she's earned the right to hear a comment like this.

Hmmm...giving me pause for thought...perhaps that was played well in the last situation where I over-alpha'd the woman and didn't do enough of that in date...

What's your suggestion then?

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Like I said, everything you've done thus far has been perfect. You have to remember, though: realistically, you've only been out with her ONCE. So, while you two may have clicked and everything FEELS right, you've only really spent time with her for a couple hours max. That's not enough time for her to feel comfortable with you giving her compliments that indicate you're already head-over-heels in love with her, which is what the one you proposed to say can do.

I tend to keep it simple: I call them up and say, "Hey, so-and-so, it's Harry, how are you?" They'll usually respond, "Oh, I'm doing good, how about you?" I give a brief-yet-undetailed reply about how my day's going - "I'm doing good, just been out running errands today, trying to stay out of trouble, lol - how about yourself?" They usually answer with something generic - "I'm doing good, nothing too eventful, blah blah blah..." Then, I go into my spiel: "Well, I don't want to keep you on the phone for too long, but I was calling because I wanted to take you out to do (activity) and wanted to know if (day A) or (day B) worked for you." Then I shut up and wait for her to respond. Once she picks a day, I say "Great - let's do it at (time of day), does (time A) or (time B) work best for you?" She responds, then I say "Great! So, (day) at (time), we'll meet up and do (activity). (Also make sure to work out if you're meeting her there or picking her up at her place.) Well, enjoy the rest of your day, and I will see you later!" Then I hang up.

Pretty simple stuff, but I find the simpler you make your moves, the better it works out. Hope this helps!

 

[Igetit!]

Thus far you've done everything GREAT, actually... with that said - and I'm happy to hear other's thoughts on this - it may be too early to go with the whole "I was just thinking about you and I wanted to hear your voice" bit. Yes, you want her to know you like her, but this just SCREAMS "you've already got me," and she still needs to feel like she doesn't have you yet on this level. I usually reserve these kinds of comment for after I've been dating a girl for two months - by that time, we've gone out enough to where she's earned the right to hear a comment like this.

Honestly....I thought the exact same thing. The thing that kinda made me raise an eyebrow was what the OP said here......

From what we talked about I could tell she was needing love. So I gave her what she needed when we met.

This is kinda......I just don't know. The OP said he just had a date with this girl LAST NIGHT. He made this thread 6 hours ago,so he's talking about giving her "love" LESS THAN 24 hours after a first date......less than 24 hours after meeting her.

That's just too soon. You don't know each other,haven't even had sex,but are already speaking about love?

What came to my mind was what the OP said here....

I have a feeling this could burn intense and hot for a while, like her wanting to see me every day, but ultimately fizzle out

That's what I think giving her "love" when you two don't know each other could possibly lead to,makes me think she'll pull out the "We're moving too fast" or "I need some space" line.

That's what my logical mind tells me,but you know what....

I've seen the threads by BITG and Guru1000,and honestly....I've been amazed at the results they've gotten. I've seen the things they've said and done to women,and I was plain DUMBFOUNDED by the results. So I can't say anything against what BITG did here....I only say what generally happens when one gets too emotional too soon.

I'm curious to see what the results here will be.

 

[guru1000]

Too much analysis. Not much you can do to fvck this up.

Just ask the bvtch out. Specific day and time. Save beta throws for in-date if she gives you the ASD.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Honestly....I thought the exact same thing. The thing that kinda made me raise an eyebrow was what the OP said here......

This is kinda......I just don't know. The OP said he just had a date with this girl LAST NIGHT. He made this thread 6 hours ago,so he's talking about giving her "love" LESS THAN 24 hours after a first date......less than 24 hours after meeting her.

I think you are confusing what "love" means. Not talking about "I'm in love" with her, rather she needs to be shown "love", ie, caring, nurturing, etc...I correctly identified the type of woman I was dealing with and what would work in this situation, rather than just going with what I normally do--something I've been trying to work on, and Guru has done a great job in a prior thread of laying some of this out.

So the difference is you aren't really that beta acting person all the time, but you give it to them in measured doses but still maintain your otherwise Alpha demeanor. Then it becomes "sweet, caring, charming, etc". It shows you care about them as a person not just for sex, and with the right type of woman it works like magic.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Too much analysis. Not much you can do to fvck this up.

Just ask the bvtch out. Specific day and time. Save beta throws for in-date if she gives you the ASD.

Lol, pretty astute. I called her, she missed my call because she was working and texted me back "Crap!!!!" And asked "What's wrong, NAME?"

She texts "I missed your call :-("

So I text her "Well, call back silly! "

She got all excited and said she is making lunch for her client but basically begged me to let her call me back afterwards. I said sure.

She calls 10 minutes later, shoot the breeze for a few minutes then I ask if she is still off Tuesday(she told me last week she was off Tuesday), she said she is and we made plans. Before I get off the phone she asks if she is going to hear from me before then and I tell her "Maybe" with a chuckle. And she laughs and says "That means no!", and again I said "Maybe" and she laughs...have a game tomorrow and she wished me good luck and said I can always let her know how it goes.

Then she texts me 5 minutes after I got off the phone that she is so excited to see me Tuesday.

I'm honestly kind of stunned by all this. Can't remember a woman being this into me so quickly. And she is smoking hot. But the funny thing is I was completely unaffected by it, thought I would have been nervous but I was very calm and confident in what I was doing. I think that's a big thing I've learned. When you absolutely know what you are doing you are completely confident in yourself and aren't nervous. There is definitely something to knowing how to strategize beforehand as to how to approach things by gathering info.

I'm wondering if it might be easier to do this with really hot women since they are used to having guys simply try to bang them or go out with them because of the way they look and don't take the time to show appreciation of their other qualities. Whatever it is, I need to keep doing it, for anyone wondering how they know if a woman is really interested in them, post date, re-read this post. Basically no matter what you do it will work because they want it to work.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

In answer to your question: yes, it's SURPRISINGLY easy to score with hot women. Men think just because they see a hot woman that she automatically knows she's the shiznit. More often than not, though, they don't - she knows how she looks when she first gets up, or how bad her farts/craps are, or some of the nastier habits she has, or the fact that she bleeds for 5 days straight a month and is not in the best mood during that time... in short, she's so aware of all the flaws she has she isn't constantly judging herself as the "hot chick" everyone else sees her as. If you keep these things in your head when approaching hot women, it becomes VERY easy to connect with them because you're essentially seeing thru her facade and getting to the root of who she REALLY is and how she REALLY feels about herself.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Unbelievably, I get this text about an hour ago:

"Hey, so I'm going to cancel. It was nice meeting you. Best wishes."

Wtf just happened??

 

[Duro]

Unbelievably, I get this text about an hour ago:

"Hey, so I'm going to cancel. It was nice meeting you. Best wishes."

Wtf just happened??

She's trying to get to know the REAL you by testing you and flaking out BUT reaching out to you and not just ignoring and flaking. She wants to see if you get mad, try to get back at her, or are waiting on her.

The chick sounds a bit screwed up though from your story.

If you get mad, try to get back at her etc. she's proved you to be full of sh1t of what she may have thought good about you in the beginning. (Like she's most likely tested other dudes who blow up when she blows them off.)

You already started playing little boy games from the beginning, trying to tease her with "maybes" instead of just being straight up and telling her you'd call, promising "birthday spankings" with someone you just met who MAY have liked you yet herself was touching you etc. playing her own game of what she's most likely done with other dudes many times to see if they are just trying to hit and quit.

She used her sexuality and let you fall right into playing games with her. You think these chicks are stupid that they can't tell when some dude is playing a game especially when they could have many other guys?

Fvck the games. Come real. Win or lose. Most can't do that yet love to spew they are outcome "independent".


At this point you REPLY:

Hey. No problem. It was great meeting you the other night. You must have a lot on your mind and I hope things work out for you as you seem like a pretty cool person. Take care. (Your real first name) =)

Send that text with the smiley or call her and tell her. Then leave it be and move on.

Do not ask her out again. Do not ask her why she's flaking or changed her mind. Do not text her after that nor call her etc. She may just come back on her own as you showed her by that reply you aren't effected at all and are cool with her and walking away. If she comes back? You don't ask her out again. You just talk to her as if nothing happened and tell her it was great talking to her again. Then you leave the convo and keep it moving.

It will marinate on her mind that she might be making a mistake and wind up contacting you again and eventually you'll meet up. In the meantime meet other chicks.

Show no anger or bitterness. It's what she's looking for to prove that you are going to be pissed not seeing her and getting laid.

 

[TheGambino]

Unbelievably, I get this text about an hour ago:

"Hey, so I'm going to cancel. It was nice meeting you. Best wishes."

Wtf just happened??

Ignore that text, sh1t test.

 

[guru1000]

Let's identify the problem:

1. What has transpired since you arranged the date?

2. What site did you meet the girl on?

3. Has she been checking your profile?

 

[Duro]

Ignore that text, sh1t test.

No. Kids playing passive aggressive games pretending not to be outcome dependent would ignore it. OP started playing kid games from jump.

A man would reply and let her know he's ok with her and himself walking away.

If OP replies with:

Hey. No problem. It was great meeting you the other night. You must have a lot on your mind and I hope things work out for you as you seem like a pretty cool person. Take care. (Your real first name) =)

It shows her he isn't playing games. He isn't going to play games like ignoring the text and she happens to come back and they go back and forth trying to "win". It shows he's okay with her walking away. He "understands" her without asking her why she's flaking and blowing him off as he's used to dealing with chicks. He's ok with walking away himself regardless if she's hot and they had mentioned sex. Her touching him on the date etc. is normal for him and he's not going to chase her.

She's going to second guess herself that she might be missing out on a good dude.

It takes 30 seconds or less to send that message and keep it moving. She will show that message to her friends who might tell her she should think again. Otherwise if he doesn't reply and she tells her friends they'll most likely tell her good. Fck him.

Either deal with things like a man or continue playing games pretending not to care.

 

[KingBeef]

Ignore her. Don't respond back to her until she responds back to you with some crazy offer...if not move on. There may be more to her than meets the eye.