"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
FR: At the gym
- Thread starter Broham
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Broham
Senior Don Juan
Seth- Thanks man. I too think I'm about 90% there but still haven't found the remaining pieces to the puzzle. Those pieces being closing the right away, and as Blitz said, creating empathy.
BigMike- I'm game for a Boston DJ get-together. I actually posted about this in the wingman forum. I've always believed in power in numbers, and if we brought our experiences together we'd be upstoppable!
Broham
Senior Don Juan
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
tmpgstx
Master Don Juan
Also, when you asked that girl about having sex with what guy at the gym - she doesn't know you well enough yet for you to ask something like this IMO. It comes off as a 'player' type and just interested in sex if ya get my drift.
Excellent post by Blitz,Originally posted by xblitz44x
Broham,
I respect the way you perceive each situation as an opportunity, and how you charge through your fear to approach, that is awesome. You are about 300 steps above a lot of people here.
Your problem is that you're TOO comfortable and seem to ignore her comfort level. When you reach the level you're at, and you're able to approach, start and sustain a conversation, and close...your next step is EMPATHY.
Empathy is understanding and considering another's situation or state. Put yourself in her shoes and imagine if a "strange" guy asked you in the first 10 minutes who you'd like to have sex with. It is extremely intrusive to some and you have to be aware of that.
Before you approach, put yourself in her shoes and think of how you can put HER more at ease so that she can more comfortable thus responsive to your advances.
Those two girls may very well have found you attractive, but your abrasive manner was a threat to them.
Great progress though, congrats.
Blitz
This is what I was looking for, this explains my awesome success!
Thanks Blitz!
Broham
Senior Don Juan
Good point man. I think girls would rather have a player than a pvssy though.Originally posted by tmpgstx
Also, when you asked that girl about having sex with what guy at the gym - she doesn't know you well enough yet for you to ask something like this IMO. It comes off as a 'player' type and just interested in sex if ya get my drift.
Broham
Senior Don Juan
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
*takes some serious notes*Originally posted by Broham
B: Occasionally!? and I thought you were a fun girl!
H: Well, uhh....
B: Hey, I'm sure scrabble can be fun.
H: hahaha
B: Ok, let's do this. here's my #. let's plan on meeting up at starbucks on Wed at 7:30. ***If you can't make it, give me a call.***
ha, there is such a thing as being too smooth.Originally posted by xblitz44x
Broham,
Your problem is that you're TOO comfortable
*shakes head*
One day man One day