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For Guitarist: Reasons Why Guitars are Better Than Women

Francisco d'Anconia

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Got this in an email.

Why Guitars are Better Than Women

  1. A guitar has a volume knob
  2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $. 79 for a new one
  3. You can make a guitar scream as loud as you want it to
  4. You can unplug a guitar
  5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more
  6. Other people can play your guitar without it getting upset
  7. You can finger a guitar in public and get applause, not arrested
  8. You can have a guitar any color you want and no one will care
  9. You can make your guitar as tight as you want it just by turning a peg.
  10. If your guitar doesn't make sounds you like, you can retune it
  11. You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar
  12. If your guitar strings are too heavy, you can just get a lighter set
  13. You can have a guitar professionally adjusted to *your* liking
  14. If you scratch a guitar's back, it's unintentional, not required
  15. You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free
  16. It's good to have a guitar that's stretched out.
  17. You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed
  18. You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you.
  19. You can play the guitar with your bare fingers and no protective covering.
  20. You can get rich playing a guitar, not broke.
  21. A guitar doesn't take half of everything you own when you sell it.
 

Mr.Positive

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Hahaha...too funny.

The one that gets me the most is 11.

Francisco d'Anconia said:
[*]You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar
I really would not want to meet a woman I needed to use 4 fingers on. :nervous:
 

In Motion

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A-****ING-MEN! But I just cant keep my fingers away from girls either, or a girl. Im in a relationship with my girl and my guitar. And Im sure that my relationship with my guitar will last longer.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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In Motion said:
... Im in a relationship with my girl and my guitar. And Im sure that my relationship with my guitar will last longer.
Well in comparison, keeping around a '69 Strat is usually better than keeping around a '69 slut (not talking about your girl specifically).
 

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"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"

woods

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You wont go to prison for lighting your guitar on fire, or smashing it onstage
I actually WANT to listen to my guitar scream
You can get a "dual humbucker" anytime (thats bad, I know)
Picking up a guitar is effortless
My mom never called my guitar a hor
I can get rid of the feedback from my guitar
My friends dycks have never been in my guitar (i hope)
 

bmxcetera

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My bass allows me to find out just how low it will go, at any given time.
 
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