"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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For date-coffee or drink

Darrenez

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Hi guys,

I wanted to know your opinion on what you think is better when first meeting a woman. Meeting up for a coffee or for a drink..Recently I have been suggesting coffee, the reason being is because it is more casual and doesn't put pressure on them. Hence, I think they won't cancel if it is just a coffee. The 2nd date is my drink , go to.

However after reading on here and speaking to mates they suggest a drink. Bear in mind, an alcoholic drink costs more than a coffee.

What do you guys usually do? As I said usually it would be a drink but recently I have been saying lets meet for a coffee...
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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3agle 3yes

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Do you really think it maters?

If you don't want to put pressure on her tell her it's not a date.
 

Alvafe

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I personally don't drink coffee, but has anyone dealt with a girl that doesn't drink coffee? Do you substitute for a wine bar or just go to the corner bar?
since I also don't drink coffe, go take a ice cream or any kind of food, knowing a place who serve good food on the go, go a long way
 

Roober

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I usually just do a drink or two.

Coffee just seems so lame and boring, doesn't really fit my personality at all. The vibe at coffee shops is generally much different than a bar/restaurant as well. Plus, I like to do a lot of filtering on a first date. Have to determine if she is worth any further investment. 1-2 drinks will usually loosen them up enough to reveal character flaws. The exception would be if we got coffee and took a stroll around a park or something.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Darrenez

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Thank you guys. Usually if its a woman I really fancy and think is worth it maybe a restaurant date with me paying. However, I'm learning that this is a bad idea with things not leading to a second a date.
 

Juanto

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Dont do a dinner date on a first date mate, never. She doesnt deserve it yet.
 

TheProspect

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I personally drink neither but I feel like a coffee date would give you more versatility. I've met girls who either don't drink or are not open to having a drink with a complete stranger. Do the coffee date and escalate to a drink from there if it's going well, that would be your best bet in my opinion.
 

SuckItUp

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Not a big fan of coffee dates because typically it means sitting inside when the sun is out. I'd recommend either drinks in the evening, which is more conducive to a woman being receptive to your advances or an active date which is more conducive to kino.
 

Roober

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Dinner dates are awkward for everyone. Maybe get an app and sit at the bar? Never sit across from her, always next to her or nearby. Before I started this a couple months ago, I would have done dinner dates. Now, I understand the importance of coming on strong, illustrating your masculinity. You have to tap her emotions.

I usually eat before the date as well, that way I only have to buy one dinner!
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Darrenez

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Dinner dates are awkward for everyone. Maybe get an app and sit at the bar? Never sit across from her, always next to her or nearby. Before I started this a couple months ago, I would have done dinner dates. Now, I understand the importance of coming on strong, illustrating your masculinity. You have to tap her emotions.

I usually eat before the date as well, that way I only have to buy one dinner!

An App?..good tip on not sitting opposite her, guessing this is so you can exchange body touching etc and create more chemistry. Meeting someone for coffee tomorrow and if all goes well and we get on, the 2nd date would be a drink/activity/food.
 

Roober

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An App?..good tip on not sitting opposite her, guessing this is so you can exchange body touching etc and create more chemistry. Meeting someone for coffee tomorrow and if all goes well and we get on, the 2nd date would be a drink/activity/food.
Appetizer. Definitely get close to her. this allows you to play with her (i.e. touch her), get that close physical proximity, make good eye contact, etc. If at a table, and she is sitting at 12oclock, sit at 2-3 oclock. If I ever end up at a table with a date, I will sit next to her and just use the "my hearing is damaged from the concerts when I was young"

It sounds weird, but there is something about being closer to a woman that seems to comfort her, and draw her into your frame. Maybe it is all in my head though...
 

ChristopherColumbus

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The bench seats next to the windows are perfect for a coffee date. A casual coffee enables you to screen. If you get on well, you head to the park for a walk.
 

9Volt

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Hi guys,

I wanted to know your opinion on what you think is better when first meeting a woman. Meeting up for a coffee or for a drink..Recently I have been suggesting coffee, the reason being is because it is more casual and doesn't put pressure on them. Hence, I think they won't cancel if it is just a coffee. The 2nd date is my drink , go to.

However after reading on here and speaking to mates they suggest a drink. Bear in mind, an alcoholic drink costs more than a coffee.

What do you guys usually do? As I said usually it would be a drink but recently I have been saying lets meet for a coffee...
Real question is after how many coffee or drink dates with a chick or different chicks does it get boring doing the same routine?
 

Darrenez

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Real question is after how many coffee or drink dates with a chick or different chicks does it get boring doing the same routine?
Funny you say that as recently I have started to get a little bit bored. As in routine of wearing same clothes, getting ready to meet a woman that I may be disappointed with, arranging a possible second date with etc...
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

9Volt

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Funny you say that as recently I have started to get a little bit bored. As in routine of wearing same clothes, getting ready to meet a woman that I may be disappointed with, arranging a possible second date with etc...
Well you should have different outfits to wear.

As far as "coffee or drink" meets/dates that shyt is boring as fvck. I'm going to be doing something productive and interesting. If a chick isn't interested in that? She can either sit her azz at home or go on a "exciting" coffee or drink date with someone else. I always wind up having something to do regardless.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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Real question is after how many coffee or drink dates with a chick or different chicks does it get boring doing the same routine?
It should never be boring if you are having a coffee with a new lady you have met, and are attracted too.

But then you only want to have one or two coffees with a particular woman before moving things along to other venues.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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The bench seats next to the windows are perfect for a coffee date. A casual coffee enables you to screen. If you get on well, you head to the park for a walk.
This enables the 'bubble' to develop. From there it is a walk in the park to get up and go for a walk in the park.
 

9Volt

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It should never be boring if you are having a coffee with a new lady you have met, and are attracted too.

But then you only want to have one or two coffees with a particular woman before moving things along to other venues.
If I meet some chick we're going somewhere and it ain't for coffee. Maybe after coffee and or a drink but I've got other shyt to do then just meet up for a coffee.
 

ubercat

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I like drinks. 1 if she s willing to go sex is always on the table if u don't fcvk up 2 if she refuses a second drink there s no tingles and I walk. 3 there ain't no pool tables in cafes.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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