"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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For Christmas, I'm going to get [Member Name] a ______.

Atom Smasher

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Since things are pretty slow around here, why don't we list some imaginary Christmas lists in the format outlined in the subject line?

e.g.
For Christmas, I'm going to get Judge Nismo a SoSuave-embossed gold-plated gavel.

I'm going to get Atom Smasher a keg of Geritol (I beat you bastards to it). ;)

I'm going to get backbreaker a spell checker.

I'm going to get Rollo a sober proof-reader.

Everybody, have at it. I'm sure we'll get some very creative posts.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Peaks&Valleys

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I'm going to get LiveFreeX a one way plane ticket to the U.S.

....and get Atom Smasher a Hoveround.
 

speed dawg

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I'm going to get backbreaker another internet hobby.

I'm going to get Gaylan a granola bar.

I'm going to get Espi a framed George Zimmerman poster.

I'm going to get Bible_Belt a double ended dildo for he and his girl.

I'm going to get bradd80 a golden mirror to look at himself all day long.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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U

user43770

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I'm gonna get Burroughs a new ISP. Miss that guy these days.

I'm gonna buy Mike32ct a ticket to Vegas so he can pull mad hoes and write another epic field report.

Gonna buy Who Dares Win a Glock 21 so that he doesn't have to worry about intruders.

Gonna buy Danger the government, so he can take over and make everything right for the male sex.

Gonna give Tits so much money that he never has to worry about anything ever again.

Gonna get Deep Dish a record deal so I can finally bootleg his music.

Gonna buy MikeBrown30 whatever he wants.

Gonna buy KontrollerX happiness.

Gonna buy Purefilth a sick ass squat rack.

I'm gonna take Espi to Mons Venus and pay for everything (intend to do this one in real life).
 

InnerHappiness

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This Christmas, I'd get

Mike32ct an inflatable English teach
NaughtyNinja a new POF account
Atom Smasher a handsaw since it will be powered next couple of years
backbreaker a My Little Pony diary
Colossus a prostitute for your broken arm (I don't know you that well, but you give off so little info, I;m sure not many do)
Bible_Belt a years supply of Extenze for his raunchy GF
zekko a fvcking Dominos pizza because appears he has everything he wants
PlayHerMan a Rosie the Riveter poster
samspade a European pageant bombshell
Desdinova, Miley Cirus in duet / porn scene
Jitterbug - IDK, a Slap Chop
PPRF an Asian Mail order bride
Who Dares Win a copy of Adam Sander's Anger Management
taiyuu_otoko a time machine
Espi a 3 year subscription to Match.com
T!ts a fake negative pregnancy test
bradd80 a website domain
Iceberg an official comedy show
Rollo Tomassi people to 'get' you
cordoncordon a wonderful wedding
Social_Leper to be the Best DJ
floydb25 a more positive view
nismo-4 his own accessorized courtroom with Barbie stenographer
BeDJ more field reports
VladPatton a journey of forever knowledge
5strings a lifetime supply of Keep-ur-Wit 30mg
Boilermaker a Santa tie
jophil28 a prayer
Scaramouche a ticket to the Philipines
Aristipus I don't know, you rock
Ah fvck I'm tired and sorry for the others that could not post.
 

Atom Smasher

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Tits a wonder bra - He doesn't get nearly enough support around here.

Desdinova a new Lithium-Ion motorized ban hammer (Available from DeWalt... Full disclosure: I'm an affiliate)

5string a new string to make it a proper 6

Humble Ninja two more hands to handle his POF accounts, his SS account, and whatever other KBJ'ing he's up to on the Interwebs.

Zarky a new book, "So You Want to be a Liberal"

Dr. Beard - sanity

Pook a 1 hour interview with Aristotle and a book, "So You Want to Speak in The King's English"

jophil a box of Cuban cigars

Collosus an all-around good guy award

Squirrels a missing persons' report

Mike32ct another all-around good guy award

Bradd80 1 hour a day with Ronaldo who will be doing paralegal work for him

Peaks&Valleys a season pass to Friday Night Fights with Tits & Zarky

PlayHer Man a case of red spray paint. Also, a punching bag with a picture of a generic, all-purpose "fag" on it
 
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speed dawg

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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Atom Smasher

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No kidding? :rolleyes:

I like to make a nod to the old days once in a while.
 

Who Dares Win

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Atom Smasher said:
No kidding? :rolleyes:

I like to make a nod to the old days once in a while.
Old days? u mean when you were young and the american flag had only 13 stars put in a circle?

Feel free to nod as much as you want cause for this christmass Im gonna get you a rocking chair for you to sit outside to stare at the kids and tell them that at their age you were already married.
 

InnerHappiness

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You did karaoke, but if we are playing white santa, I'd steal it and give you Espi's "Love at First Type" Webinar.

Slickster a Honeymoon cruise
betheman the same as I will give myself. An all-exoense paid to S. America
Bokanosky a deputy badge of the retarded poster on sosuave
V. U. nothing, because you have acheived what you wanted to
Arcbound a very bright future, you have much wisdom for being 22
Burroughs a Rosie O Donell threesome with Ellen Degenerus
squirrels.....
A lot, you gave your experiences and taken it all away. I really would want to speak to you. Too bad you are gone, I think I am in the same faze as you when you stopped here. Maybe you are muuch happy now. Maybe you aren't. Your last words were the same as mine, I hope you took the more positive route resolution. There are negstives, but I hope you took the positive one. We will never hear from you again, but take care.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Desdinova

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First, innerhappiness is trying to hook me up with that ugly twerking goof, and now vantagepoint is trying to get me fat. I love you guys.

I'm getting Vice a crate to ship his ex-gf and all her 5hit to Africa.
 

zekko

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InnerHappiness said:
zekko a fvcking Dominos pizza because appears he has everything he wants.
I'd like a Domino's pizza :)

It's true I have almost everything I want, but cut me some slack. I'm 53 frigging years old so chances are I'm on my last frigging legs here.

Oh, I should give a present.
I'll give Pook his face on a milk carton.
 
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