She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
I totally disagree with this.JPFromTally said:Some ethnicities tend to complain more and tip way less. So if there is a predominance of them in your geographic area then you will be frustrated quickly working at this type of establishment.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
To address the last issue first: I work at the best restaurant in town. I have no control over the fact that the best restaurant in town is a chain steakhouse. We have the best waitstaff in town, no question.cpddavis said:Aaron
Look, some black and hispanic people are decent tippers. But generally, it isn't something their culture places much importance on. I've waited a ****-ton of tables in my life and talked about this with countless servers. I don't know a single one who would disagree with me on this, including black and hispanic waiters. Additionally, men are better tippers than women and most college kids are terrible (regardless of ethnicity).
Additional piece of advice: Don't wait tables at chain restaurants. Tips suck there. Find a popular local place that people like to drink at a lot. You'll have better luck, meet cooler service industry people.