Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

first meeting from net... pay?

golf299

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 1, 2002
Messages
417
Reaction score
1
Location
STL
in a couple days i'm going to meet up with this chick that i met over the net. we're just going to lunch and then to this 4-story tall bookstore. we've emailed quite a few times and talked on the phone once.

should i offer to pay for the lunch? i'm leaning towards splitting the bill....

thanks guys!
 

Lost In the Seas

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Messages
236
Reaction score
0
Age
34
Location
Hong Kong
all the other girls i have dated are genuinely nice and they activel offer to split or accept my request to split the bill, but what if the girl is mean and cheap and decline the split? what precedures should i take?
 

penguin

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2005
Messages
168
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by Lost In the Seas
all the other girls i have dated are genuinely nice and they activel offer to split or accept my request to split the bill, but what if the girl is mean and cheap and decline the split? what precedures should i take?
If she's stubborn, just pay it and be on your merry way... without her. :D
 

Warning!

Do not subscribe to The SoSuave Newsletter unless you are already a chick magnet!

The information in each issue of The SoSuave Newsletter is too powerful for most guys to handle. If you are an ordinary guy, it is not for you. It is meant for the elite few. Not the unwashed masses.

If you know you can handle it...

If you already have girls calling you at all hours of the day and night, showing up at your door, throwing themselves at you everywhere you go...

Then sign up below.

But if you're just an average Joe, an ordinary guy, no one special – then skip this. It is not for you.

becker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2003
Messages
1,703
Reaction score
4
The general answer to this is to pay for yourself only. That's my normal way of doing it. However, if you feel you need to pay, make sure (1) you don't make a big presentation out of it, do it very non-chalantly, as though it doesn't mean anything, just a philanthropic gesture and/or (2) you tell her she can get you next time. If you don't do these things, there may be the problem of it coming off as a bit manipulative. The last thing you want is some girl you just met reading into it, which she will undoubtedly do, since she IS female.

Last time I went out with a girl who expected me to pay on the first date I never called her again. Sometimes it's hard to not pay when she just sits there waiting for it because if you guys planned on doing something afterwards, you will either create this tense awkwardness that will spoil your evening, or you'll have to insist she pays and cut off the evening right then and there. Sometimes for the sake of you enjoying the rest of your night, you just go ahead and pay, have some fun doing whatever you want, and never call her again.
 

00Kevin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 16, 2003
Messages
1,962
Reaction score
20
Location
toronto
be the man and pay.. gauge her reaction to you taking control. You want to make sure she is the type of girl that admires a provider.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,515
Reaction score
62
Location
Galt's Gulch
Why would you take a woman you don't even know to lunch? You have no idea if the two of you are even going to have a second date. If you would have kept it simple and just met for coffee you would have been able to determine if she's even worth the time and effort of a second date and not have to worry about who pays. :rolleyes:
 

Oxide

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 21, 2003
Messages
3,234
Reaction score
25
Francisco, do we have to go through this EVERY FVCKING TIME with these guys?! How hard is it to get in your head that you split the bill, ESPECIALLY the first dates and ESPECIALLY If you met her off some intrnet site (why the hell you'd do it is beyond me... )

Fran and me are going to start robbing you fools, it seem like you got too much money to spare...:trouble:
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,515
Reaction score
62
Location
Galt's Gulch
Originally posted by Oxide
Francisco, do we have to go through this EVERY FVCKING TIME with these guys?! How hard is it to get in your head that you split the bill, ESPECIALLY the first dates and ESPECIALLY If you met her off some intrnet site (why the hell you'd do it is beyond me... )

Fran and me are going to start robbing you fools, it seem like you got too much money to spare...:trouble:
Yeah, maybe that'll teach them. .... Latest woman I met online brought me a bottle of wine, I didn't give her squat. I don't know why guys choose to date women that expect the guy to always pay.
 

chili kat

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 22, 2003
Messages
149
Reaction score
1
Well.... since you're in this position, If you think it's too late to clearly imply you believe it should be a dutch thing, call her on it when the bill arrives. You're getting together to get to know each other, so get to know her. Curiously ask her what kind of girl she is on the issue.
 

Julian

Banned
Joined
Jul 30, 2003
Messages
4,799
Reaction score
1,234
lunch and a bookstore? from a netslut?

How about you just tell her to meet you behind walmart with her std test results.
 

tristan22

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 29, 2001
Messages
662
Reaction score
0
If you ask someone out with you, you should pay. However, never ever ever buy girls you are dating gifts; it's the kiss of death!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,515
Reaction score
62
Location
Galt's Gulch
Originally posted by tristan22
If you ask someone out with you, you should pay. ...
I see the problem with you guys; you don't know how to get a girl to go out with you without[/i] inferring that you will pay.

AFC:"Hey, if you agree to be seen in public with me, I'll buy you food!"
HB:"Ummm OK, I have plans tonight but I'll meet you for lunch."
(If I'm lucky, after lunch he'll ask me to go to a movie with him. I'd still have time to ditch him afterward and go clubbing to find a DJ!)

Hope you guys have good paying jobs. You're going to drop a pretty penny for a while whenever you get a date.
 

BigFoot

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2005
Messages
186
Reaction score
0
Location
Montana
It probably depends somewhat on your financial situation. I usually pay, but if she wanted to pay half or all of it that's OK too.
I like to be a little generous to others without being concerned about whether there's a "payback" or not.
 

image

Put away your credit card.

You can now read our detailed guide to women and dating for free - Right Here!

becker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2003
Messages
1,703
Reaction score
4
It's always dangerous to pay, because as I stated before, it's HOW you do it, not WHETHER you do it that determines whether it was a bad move on your part. Nonchalantness is the key.
 

DJDamage

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 6, 2004
Messages
5,666
Reaction score
103
Location
Canada
Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
AFC:"Hey, if you agree to be seen in public with me, I'll buy you food!"
HB:"Ummm OK, I have plans tonight but I'll meet you for lunch."
(If I'm lucky, after lunch he'll ask me to go to a movie with him. I'd still have time to ditch him afterward and go clubbing to find a DJ!)/B]



Francisco your example illustrates perfectly what the mindset of a girl is who hardly even knows you. This is what HB's think 99% of the time when a chump she doesn't know offers to pay and buy her food. I cringe when I read it because its true. It should make everyone mad when they read this and stop throwing money and feed those pigeons because doing that does not raise interest level but only fills their stomach and ego :cuss:

Actually its better for the DJ out there for other guys to feed their gf's, drive them around, listen to their problems and in the end of the day all the DJ has to do is fvck her. Everything else is already supplicated by the AFC. By feeding her and doing what is above you make life much easier for other guys (You don't know of) to fvck her.
 
Top