First Date Requesting Dinner after Drinks before we meet

[member160292]

Maybe I'm reading into this too much, but this is my first encounter.

We agreed on drinks Monday at 6 and she texts me last night asking if we can go somewhere to eat. Many posters have mentioned that there's chicks out there that want a free meal. Which is definitely true in some cases. My other thought is she might wants to prematurely extend the date, but that seems a little fishy.

So far,
-Quick exchange on Hinge and she texted me an hour after I gave her my number
-She has read receipts on and texts right after she reads it
-Had a 30 minute call, but lasted for more than an hour

What's your take on this?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Just tell her you will have already eaten by the time you get there.

 

[EyeBRollin]

“I can only do drinks. See you Monday at 6?”

She has no right to ask for more than what you offered. This is a red flag. If she protests or tries to alter the plan further, withdraw the date offer.

 

[bat soup]

Maybe I'm reading into this too much, but this is my first encounter.

We agreed on drinks Monday at 6 and she texts me last night asking if we can go somewhere to eat. Many posters have mentioned that there's chicks out there that want a free meal. Which is definitely true in some cases. My other thought is she might wants to prematurely extend the date, but that seems a little fishy.

So far,
-Quick exchange on Hinge and she texted me an hour after I gave her my number
-She has read receipts on and texts right after she reads it
-Had a 30 minute call, but lasted for more than an hour

What's your take on this?

When a woman likes you she lets you LEAD.
When a woman wants to take advantage of you she LEADS you on. That's what she's trying to do. She wants to make sure she doesn't "waste" her time by going out with a guy that won't buy her dinner. Because for her, the free dinner is the only reason she's going out.

 

[sevbucmash]

Perhaps she is old fashioned and doing drinks of kind of slut for her values and having a dinner is more what old value chicks do. There is that. So no need to see it as some sort of availability trap **** test or free food type of screw situation. Maybe it is a test, because nowadays a lot of guys expect to go out there and invest minumum on a date -- virgin type of guys. Just make sure:

A) You like how she acts.
B) You take her to a place you choose, not what she suggests.

There is a new type of crime nowadays, women meet men (or men think they met a woman), and they go to a restaurant and rack up a big bill. Girl works for the restaurant. Keep that in mind.

In any case it would be dumb to take her to an expensive place on 1st date. I'd hit fast food place or suggest going back to my place and ordering food.

 

[member160292]

I'm going to leave that on read and tell her Monday morning that we should have drinks to see if we click before going any further.

 

[sevbucmash]

You two won't be meeting. I'd do a compromise, baby, we'll just order something to eat at the bar, it's fun there, you'll like it.

 

[SW15]

I'm going to leave that on read and tell her Monday morning that we should have drinks to see if we click before going any further.

This is good enough.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I'm going to leave that on read and tell her Monday morning that we should have drinks to see if we click before going any further.

Knock off the game playing. Be direct. I gave you a simple, straight to the point text.

“I can only do drinks. See you Monday at 6?”

 

[bat soup]

Perhaps she is old fashioned and doing drinks of kind of slut for her values and having a dinner is more what old value chicks do.

Most women are old-fashioned when it comes to sticking their hands in men's pockets.

 

[Doctor Europeo]

I like going out to dinner. I ask her out, I pay the meal. If I dont like her, I never see her again.

 

[bat soup]

Tell her that you'll make sure that her mouth is full and that she gets plenty of nutrition.

 

[SW15]

Most women are old-fashioned when it comes to sticking their hands in men's pockets.

Agree. Women like feminism and You Go Girl ™ -ism when it suits them but still love to get the freebies from dating.

I can't tell you how peeved I've been in the past when I've bought drinks and/or dinner for women who had higher salaries than I had at the moment of that date. As time has gone on and my salary has increased, this hasn't happened as much. It's still annoying that I had to buy drinks/meals for women due to some outdated social convention.

Knock off the game playing. Be direct. I gave you a simple, straight to the point text.

“I can only do drinks. See you Monday at 6?”

If she's interested enough, she'll show up for drinks. She might cut the date short due to hunger, which would lead to no first date sex.

I schedule my dates at 7:30 PM so that women have enough time to eat. The downside of scheduling a 7:30 or 8 PM start time is that it is getting late by the time a potential sex nightcap could happen.

 

[member160292]

“I can only do drinks. See you Monday at 6?”

Only do drinks?
I'm off at 6:30, how about we meet around 7?

Something is fishy...

 

[Bigpapa]

Only do drinks?
I'm off at 6:30, how about we meet around 7?

Something is fishy...

is good . She will eat something and come to see you

 

[EyeBRollin]

Only do drinks?
I'm off at 6:30, how about we meet around 7?

Something is fishy...

Take it, lock it in. Just don’t go to dinner after the drinks. You have to leave.

“7 pm at ______ is fine. See you then.”

 

[devilkingx2]

I would've said sure and took her to a place that only has drinks, so that we had to go somewhere else for food.

If the date goes well, Id take her to go get food too.

If the date isn't going well, I'd make up some excuse to cut my losses after a couple of drinks.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Maybe I'm reading into this too much, but this is my first encounter.

We agreed on drinks Monday at 6 and she texts me last night asking if we can go somewhere to eat. Many posters have mentioned that there's chicks out there that want a free meal. Which is definitely true in some cases. My other thought is she might wants to prematurely extend the date, but that seems a little fishy.

So far,
-Quick exchange on Hinge and she texted me an hour after I gave her my number
-She has read receipts on and texts right after she reads it
-Had a 30 minute call, but lasted for more than an hour

What's your take on this?

Sounds like a professional dater. Does she speak in cliches often? Does she show genuine interest in you as a person?

Seems like there's some red flags here - she's delaying the initial text (imo to dissuade fast escalation), she's texting immediately after reading them (imo she's" processing" her prospects), there's an extended phone call involved (women like to do this to allow for better screening), and now she's pushing for food on a first meet.

I'd not only push for a drinks-only meet, I'd also insist on a maximally favorable venue as well. Limit your investment with this chick.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I like going out to dinner. I ask her out, I pay the meal. If I dont like her, I never see her again.

So do I but it's not going to be someone I have no idea whether they even look like their pics or not.

 

[member160292]

is good . She will eat something and come to see you

She replied with a heart and wink

I'll need to escalate hard on this one. I thought I got a grasp of this dating thing, but holy hell am I rusty

Have another first date in an hour, going to go for the kiss halfway in and see what happens.