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Female co worker

Rocnavy

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I called this female and she answered. I asked her did I catch you at a bad time? She said she was on her way to see her son why whats up? I then told her the reason why I called you cause I wanna get to know you outside of work in an intimate way but I didnt wanna expressed that to you while at work. She was quiet for a lil minute then responded you didnt hear me say my baby pulse had stop? I responded I understood that you was going see your son but didnt catch that it was an emergency. She went into details about the phone call she received from the hospital concerning her son and started crying. I then said well im sorry to hear that forget this conversation and I hope your son be ok. Did I do the right thing? On a side note her son nearly drown a while back but still alive by a miracle and on breathing machine
 

bat soup

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She was quiet for a lil minute then responded you didnt hear me say my baby pulse had stop?
That´s bad luck, my friend. Cokblocked by a baby. I think you came in a bit steep on the approach, given that she´s a colleague. It would have been better to ask if she´d like to get a drink with you some time rather than go straight for the kill. Once she´s out with you in person, then you can make your move.

You may be able to turn it to your advantage by calling her up later to see how she´s doing and then inviting her out.
 
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bcude

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Did I do the right thing?
(Leaving out the comical unlucky timing)
No, because of two reasons: she's a single mother and she's a co-worker. DRAMA ahead. If you're okay with those two things because you lack options, then i've complaints about your approach too.
You're basically telegraphing that you didn't have the social awareness and courage to approach her in a smooth way face to face and when you finally showed interest, you removed all mystery and challenge which is seen as cute, but not attractive.
I might sound harsh and judgemental but i rather try to save you from problems ahead and work on your mindset into a 'winners' mindset, then helping you to get involved in this future drama carousel which might cost you emotionally, financially and your work.
 

Rocnavy

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(Leaving out the comical unlucky timing)
No, because of two reasons: she's a single mother and she's a co-worker. DRAMA ahead. If you're okay with those two things because you lack options, then i've complaints about your approach too.
You're basically telegraphing that you didn't have the social awareness and courage to approach her in a smooth way face to face and when you finally showed interest, you removed all mystery and challenge which is seen as cute, but not attractive.
I might sound harsh and judgemental but i rather try to save you from problems ahead and work on your mindset into a 'winners' mindset, then helping you to get involved in this future drama carousel which might cost you emotionally, financially and your work.
Not all single mothers are bad but I do agree with her being my co worker could be bad but hardly no places that you can meet women is open due to the pandemic. Also im not scared to approached women in person cause I do that easily all the time I just didn't approach her at work cause I stand a chance on her filing sexual harassment. Not saying she will but you always gotta think ahead.
 

bcude

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Not all single mothers are bad but I do agree with her being my co worker could be bad but hardly no places that you can meet women is open due to the pandemic. Also im not scared to approached women in person cause I do that easily all the time I just didn't approach her at work cause I stand a chance on her filing sexual harassment. Not saying she will but you always gotta think ahead.
Hey man i hear you, but why do you feel the need to even meet women right now? A woman should only be a complement to your life, not the focus of it. Take the opportunity to enjoy the fact that no women are around and focus 100% on yourself right now. That is always time well spent. Part of having a 'winner' mindset is seeing something positive in everything, even seemingly negative. Easier said than done but something to strive for.

Single mothers are certainly not bad people, but they can never be a good investment for a childless man since they all come with unnecessary baggage in different forms and lifestyles are just so vastly different. She wouldn't file a sexual assault if you two talked and you sprinkled in some flirting here and there, went for lunch together and naturally took it from there if you felt the right vibe. I mean i have no experience with picking up women at work (for obvious reasons) but that's how i would approach it, not like a cold approach.
 

Rocnavy

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Hey man i hear you, but why do you feel the need to even meet women right now? A woman should only be a complement to your life, not the focus of it. Take the opportunity to enjoy the fact that no women are around and focus 100% on yourself right now. That is always time well spent. Part of having a 'winner' mindset is seeing something positive in everything, even seemingly negative. Easier said than done but something to strive for.

Single mothers are certainly not bad people, but they can never be a good investment for a childless man since they all come with unnecessary baggage in different forms and lifestyles are just so vastly different. She wouldn't file a sexual assault if you two talked and you sprinkled in some flirting here and there, went for lunch together and naturally took it from there if you felt the right vibe. I mean i have no experience with picking up women at work (for obvious reasons) but that's how i would approach it, not like a cold approach.
I understand women shouldn't never be your main focus and
Hey man i hear you, but why do you feel the need to even meet women right now? A woman should only be a complement to your life, not the focus of it. Take the opportunity to enjoy the fact that no women are around and focus 100% on yourself right now. That is always time well spent. Part of having a 'winner' mindset is seeing something positive in everything, even seemingly negative. Easier said than done but something to strive for.

Single mothers are certainly not bad people, but they can never be a good investment for a childless man since they all come with unnecessary baggage in different forms and lifestyles are just so vastly different. She wouldn't file a sexual assault if you two talked and you sprinkled in some flirting here and there, went for lunch together and naturally took it from there if you felt the right vibe. I mean i have no experience with picking up women at work (for obvious reasons) but that's how i would approach it, not like a cold approach.
I agree that a man should focus on improving himself and not make it all about the women. But at the same time nothing wrong with dating women along the way especially if you find her attractive. Now that dont mean you should settle for just her and not date other women. Its just the one at work caught my eye and I approach in a subtle since we work together. Normally when I see women outside of work that im attracted to I will cold approach but trust me I see where you coming from and sounds like you understand the game.
 

darksprezzatura

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That´s bad luck, my friend. Cokblocked by a baby. I think you came in a bit steep on the approach, given that she´s a colleague. It would have been better to ask if she´d like to get a drink with you some time rather than go straight for the kill. Once she´s out with you in person, then you can make your move.

You may be able to turn it to your advantage by calling her up later to see how she´s doing and then inviting her out.
c0ckblocked by a baby lmfao
 

Rocnavy

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That´s bad luck, my friend. Cokblocked by a baby. I think you came in a bit steep on the approach, given that she´s a colleague. It would have been better to ask if she´d like to get a drink with you some time rather than go straight for the kill. Once she´s out with you in person, then you can make your move.

You may be able to turn it to your advantage by calling her up later to see how she´s doing and then inviting her out.
****blocked by a baby lol thats her baby dude and I expect a woman to put her children before a man.
 

flowtheory

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Well, I think this is just overthinking at its finest and missing the whole point of what was going on emotionally for her. Let's just take a simple look at this.

1. She was at work about to leave.
2. You know you called at a bad time.
3. She tells you right off the bat about the a terrible situation.
4. You called to express your intimate interest in getting to know her (Completely disregarding her insane emotional situation)
5. She pauses due to sheer amazement of you pushing right by the fact that she said her babys pulse had STOPPED.
6. You then say you understood the situation (which you didn't pick up anything aside from... I have no clue, because you weren't listening to a single word)
7. She then goes into depth about the situation. And you say forget about it...

Did you do the right thing? Well that is a resounding no. You never really had a fvcking chance and the question is moot. You called at literally the worst possible timing. And you missed a major opportunity of high intimacy because you were focused on a prior outcome you desired in your mind.

Reverse the situation to someone calling you. Would you sit down and carve out a time to go for drinks while your child is hooked up to a machine to keep him alive after the person totally disregards what you said when you picked up the phone? I would hope not. You would just be trying to get off the phone. And you would probably be insanely turned off by that human in many ways.

The biggest issue here is what you did and didn't do... You said you wanted to get to know her in an intimate way after she just told you her kid is having an issue. The most intimate thing to her. You said right off the bat: "DID I CATCH YOU AT A BAD TIME?" so you knew something was wrong, but you were attached to your outcome of having drinks, rather than just being present.

This was a catastrophe. Not in a pick-up sense. But just a human sense. That is the most concerning, to me.

I would honestly just drop this one. Go get her kid an action figure and balloons because he didn't fvcking die and he's probably scared out of his mind due to his dark encounter with a swing of the scythe from the grim-reaper known as mortality.
You want intimacy? Honestly man... This is a golden opportunity. Or did you just want s3x and you call it intimacy? Because maybe you got more than you actually wanted because your words are cheap.
 

Rocnavy

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Well, I think this is just overthinking at its finest and missing the whole point of what was going on emotionally for her. Let's just take a simple look at this.

1. She was at work about to leave.
2. You know you called at a bad time.
3. She tells you right off the bat about the a terrible situation.
4. You called to express your intimate interest in getting to know her (Completely disregarding her insane emotional situation)
5. She pauses due to sheer amazement of you pushing right by the fact that she said her babys pulse had STOPPED.
6. You then say you understood the situation (which you didn't pick up anything aside from... I have no clue, because you weren't listening to a single word)
7. She then goes into depth about the situation. And you say forget about it...

Did you do the right thing? Well that is a resounding no. You never really had a fvcking chance and the question is moot. You called at literally the worst possible timing. And you missed a major opportunity of high intimacy because you were focused on a prior outcome you desired in your mind.

Reverse the situation to someone calling you. Would you sit down and carve out a time to go for drinks while your child is hooked up to a machine to keep him alive after the person totally disregards what you said when you picked up the phone? I would hope not. You would just be trying to get off the phone. And you would probably be insanely turned off by that human in many ways.

The biggest issue here is what you did and didn't do... You said you wanted to get to know her in an intimate way after she just told you her kid is having an issue. The most intimate thing to her. You said right off the bat: "DID I CATCH YOU AT A BAD TIME?" so you knew something was wrong, but you were attached to your outcome of having drinks, rather than just being present.

This was a catastrophe. Not in a pick-up sense. But just a human sense. That is the most concerning, to me.

I would honestly just drop this one. Go get her kid an action figure and balloons because he didn't fvcking die and he's probably scared out of his mind due to his dark encounter with a swing of the scythe from the grim-reaper known as mortality.
You want intimacy? Honestly man... This is a golden opportunity. Or did you just want s3x and you call it intimacy? Because maybe you got more than you actually wanted because your words are cheap.
 

Rocnavy

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Well, I think this is just overthinking at its finest and missing the whole point of what was going on emotionally for her. Let's just take a simple look at this.

1. She was at work about to leave.
(No she already had left)

2. You know you called at a bad time.
(When I called her she answered kinda fast and thats when I asked did I catch u at a bad time.)

3. She tells you right off the bat about the a terrible situation.
(No if you read my post I clearly said she told me she was on her way to see her son)

4. You called to express your intimate interest in getting to know her (Completely disregarding her insane emotional situation)
(Again if you read my post I clearly said she stated she was on her way to see her son why whats up?)
KEY WORDS Whats up [which means she open up the door for me to express the reason why I called]

5. She pauses due to sheer amazement of you pushing right by the fact that she said her babys pulse had STOPPED.

6. You then say you understood the situation (which you didn't pick up anything aside from... I have no clue, because you weren't listening to a single word)
(I said I understood the fact that she was going to see her son but didnt catch the part that it was an emergency thats what I said)

7. She then goes into depth about the situation. And you say forget about it...
(I said forget about this conversation and I hope your son is alright.)

Did you do the right thing? Well that is a resounding no. You never really had a fvcking chance and the question is moot. You called at literally the worst possible timing. And you missed a major opportunity of high intimacy because you were focused on a prior outcome you desired in your mind.

Reverse the situation to someone calling you. Would you sit down and carve out a time to go for drinks while your child is hooked up to a machine to keep him alive after the person totally disregards what you said when you picked up the phone? I would hope not. You would just be trying to get off the phone. And you would probably be insanely turned off by that human in many ways.

The biggest issue here is what you did and didn't do... You said you wanted to get to know her in an intimate way after she just told you her kid is having an issue. The most intimate thing to her. You said right off the bat: "DID I CATCH YOU AT A BAD TIME?" so you knew something was wrong, but you were attached to your outcome of having drinks, rather than just being present.

This was a catastrophe. Not in a pick-up sense. But just a human sense. That is the most concerning, to me.

I would honestly just drop this one. Go get her kid an action figure and balloons because he didn't fvcking die and he's probably scared out of his mind due to his dark encounter with a swing of the scythe from the grim-reaper known as mortality.
You want intimacy? Honestly man... This is a golden opportunity. Or did you just want s3x and you call it intimacy? Because maybe you got more than you actually wanted because your words are cheap
(Dude my advice to you before you respond to my posts or anyone else's READ IT FIRST AND NOT JUST GLANCE AT IT.
 

flowtheory

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You can be defensive all you want. And defend your very shaky position, but it still won’t change how you handled things or how you are..

Also, you’re obviously dense if this is you not catching on that it was an emergency:
“She was quiet for a lil minute then responded you didnt hear me say my baby pulse had stop?“

You: oh I didn’t realize that’s a bad thing.. duuur.. we should be intimate lol
 

Rocnavy

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You can be defensive all you want. And defend your very shaky position, but it still won’t change how you handled things or how you are..
If correcting your errors make me defensive then I guess im defensive. The reason for this post is cause I never experienced a situation like that and hoping somebody in here has so they can share how they handle it. Thanks for your opinion but it dont mean nothing cause I can see you never been in this situation
 

Rocnavy

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You can be defensive all you want. And defend your very shaky position, but it still won’t change how you handled things or how you are..

Also, you’re obviously dense if this is you not catching on that it was an emergency:
“She was quiet for a lil minute then responded you didnt hear me say my baby pulse had stop?“

You: oh I didn’t realize that’s a bad thing.. duuur.. we should be intimate lol
How would I know its an emergency when I clearly said she stated she going see her son but nothing about an emergency until I expressed my interest in her. No I dont tell women we should be intimate I tell women the reason why I approached or called them in the first place. Unlike you would probably asked women out for drinks or dinner then try to make a move only to find out she was never interested in you from the start but she enjoyed your time n money
 

BackInTheGame78

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No this is a legitimate post open for the public opinions.
I think this would be like trying to save the Titanic from sinking.

All she will be able to associate in her mind with you is the extreme negative emotion of her baby dying or almost dying because of your impeccably bad timing(through no fault of your own really). Good luck overcoming that.
 
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