"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Feild Report: Afternoon coffee date...

grayclif

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I isually use OLD and sometimes cold approach to get numbets then i get conversations started via text. Normally I take them out on early evening. Today i went on a coffee date. This one I've found online, she's a 35 yo career oriented divorced home owner with no kids. Says she married in 2001, separated in 2002 and legally divorced in 2009. So... she's been riding the carousel since 2002ish.

She's very well put together. Dressed well and obviously image concious. HB6.5/7. You can tell she's very image concious. But she was well spoken, somewhat educated. Not an exerciser (and looked a little soft in some areas).

The coffee date was a furst time for but it worked. When i asked her out I asked to go dutch. She later told me during the date that she was slightly taken aback by my dutch request but she went along anyway. Nobody ever asked her on a Dutch date before and she just had to see what this guy was about. I mentioned during my chat that I was debt free and she said she defiantly wasn't. I said homeownership is acceptable debt but she hung her head and said there was more.

Asked me if I wanted marriage and kids and I gave my usual answer that Im not opposed to either while staring deeply into their eyes. She said she definitly wants these things. (I wanted to ask her about the Wall in a PC way but decided against it).

Conversatiin was free and easy. I sat across the table from her cause that's how it was setup. I think next time I'd sit at a round table so I can scoot closer or find a park bench elsewhere in the mall. She did reach across the table to touch me a few times. If I could kino more I know this date would have gone better.

We cheek kissed after I walked her to her car and I told her I'd like to stay in touch. She said definetly. Normally after I a date I get a home safe / great time text. But since a day date I know it's not expected.

If she checks in I'll converse otherwise I'll wait a few days to setup another date. This time for early evening. If you guys have any insight I'd appreciate it. Thanks.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bible_Belt

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Was that a date or a job interview? Don't be offended, but you sound boring as hell. All of the money-related things you were talking about with her are attraction-killers.
 

Robert28

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Damn, ya'll talk about some deep stuff on a first date. Debt, kids, marriage.
 

ubercat

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Mate I m working on the same thing. Alternating the push pull with taking them into their emotions. My problem is I m a naturally entertaining guy so I struggle with aloofness and making them invest in the convo. Few thoughts that might help. Guys ll probably beat me for repping a PUA but due credit I found Bobby Rio s stuff useful. I d suggest skimming the PDFs as the DVDs r too drawn out.
 

YawataNoKami

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Of course she want stay in touch.Just re-read your original post. You are , my friend, every post wall woman dream. No debets (or major debts) and no kids. What a dream. Pump and dumb and use a condom.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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dustmuffin

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Coffee dates are great. Just make sure to sit close for kino....what was that sugar tits? I can't hear you. IMA havta come sit by you so I can hear....OK bb? Your thigh is soft!
 

Huffman

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She's looking for a provider. Fine if it's OK with you. Shouldn't there be more focus on fun during the date? Maybe there was but you didn't mention it.
Me, I'm just a romantic guy. I never mention anything about money and not even my job if she doesn't ask. I've also done some rather impressive stuff in the past which I don't mention.

My salary is easily enough for a 2 person household, but I don't want her to know. I want a woman to fall in love with me without any of that.
 

zekko

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Dutch for a coffee date? Lol.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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marmel75

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Umm...OK here goes:

1) Stop scheduling afternoon coffee dates. They are:
a) A waste of time
b) Offer no chance of escalation
c) Boring as hell​

2) Are you on a date or a job interview? WTF is with the "I want to know everything about you" type of questions?

3) "Cheek" kisses are weak. Either go for a real kiss or don't. Again, this goes back to #1---alcohol helps out a lot with loosening inhibitions

4) Hopefully you aren't asking women to send you "I got home safe" texts. That sh!t is lame as fvck. Let 9 of the other 10 dudes she dates do that type of stuff. Pretending you give a fvck about a woman you just met is retarded.

5) You are that cheap you can't pay for a coffee? Wow...speechless. This sounds like the sh!t guys who are new to this stuff do because they read about it somewhere but have no context of how to apply it properly, so they do it in completely wrong situations. This is one of those situations, btw.

6) If you set up another date, make sure it includes alcohol, and escalate. No beating around the bush. No pretending you are trying to be her chaperone. Kiss her--on the lips within the first 20 minutes of the date and then continue to escalate from there. While you are kissing her, take her hand and put it on your c0ck. Women love the confidence it takes for a man to do that.
 

marmel75

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Coffee dates are great. Just make sure to sit close for kino....what was that sugar tits? I can't hear you. IMA havta come sit by you so I can hear....OK bb? Your thigh is soft!
According to who? Coffee dates suck for anything other than talking. The odds of fvcking a chick on a coffee date versus fvcking on a date involving drinks/alcohol at night are extremely low.

Going into a date you always have to assume you are only going to get one shot at banging a chick, why would you go for the low percentage play?

Counter-productive.
 

grayclif

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Umm...OK here goes:

1) Stop scheduling afternoon coffee dates. They are:
a) A waste of time
b) Offer no chance of escalation
c) Boring as hell​

2) Are you on a date or a job interview? WTF is with the "I want to know everything about you" type of questions?

3) "Cheek" kisses are weak. Either go for a real kiss or don't. Again, this goes back to #1---alcohol helps out a lot with loosening inhibitions

4) Hopefully you aren't asking women to send you "I got home safe" texts. That sh!t is lame as fvck. Let 9 of the other 10 dudes she dates do that type of stuff. Pretending you give a fvck about a woman you just met is retarded.

5) You are that cheap you can't pay for a coffee? Wow...speechless. This sounds like the sh!t guys who are new to this stuff do because they read about it somewhere but have no context of how to apply it properly, so they do it in completely wrong situations. This is one of those situations, btw.

6) If you set up another date, make sure it includes alcohol, and escalate. No beating around the bush. No pretending you are trying to be her chaperone. Kiss her--on the lips within the first 20 minutes of the date and then continue to escalate from there. While you are kissing her, take her hand and put it on your c0ck. Women love the confidence it takes for a man to do that.

I appreciate the feedback. It was a grand experiment. We planned to meet at a local Chili's type place for lunch. I suggested dutch just to guage interest and see id she'd agreed, she did.. The bar was closed so we had coffee next door. I paid for the coffees.

I'm fully aware alcohol helps. I went with the coffee thing cause guys on here mention that they do it and I wanted to test it. Simple as that. I won't be doing it again tho.

She wore a weave and I hate weaves so there was no chance of a second date.
 

dustmuffin

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According to who? Coffee dates suck for anything other than talking. The odds of fvcking a chick on a coffee date versus fvcking on a date involving drinks/alcohol at night are extremely low.

Going into a date you always have to assume you are only going to get one shot at banging a chick, why would you go for the low percentage play?

Counter-productive.
You are missinfotmed. I have tremendousesuccesswithbcogfee fstrd.I scrrw 9 out of ten of them. Very good fate have to be top of game. I prefer tjem.
 

dustmuffin

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According to who? Coffee dates suck for anything other than talking. The odds of fvcking a chick on a coffee date versus fvcking on a date involving drinks/alcohol at night are extremely low.

Going into a date you always have to assume you are only going to get one shot at banging a chick, why would you go for the low percentage play?

Counter-productive.
I don't DRI k and have about a 90 % success Raye. It works for me.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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ubercat

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I think both could work. if you ask a girl out for drinks that's pretty much code for getting nasty so there's a bit of pre selection going on . and if you have the confidence to kino at a coffee shop where it's not common that's going to be huge.
 

grayclif

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I think both could work. if you ask a girl out for drinks that's pretty much code for getting nasty so there's a bit of pre selection going on . and if you have the confidence to kino at a coffee shop where it's not common that's going to be huge.
I know. It just feels kind of creepy meeting someone online, exchanging a few texts then feeling them up midday in some coffee shop. Doesn't matter anyway no more midday coffee dates for me.
 

Bible_Belt

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I've taken afternoon dates to a winery before. It's a socially acceptable way to drink during the day. Then we go make out on an abandoned bridge.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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