I'm scared of going up to girls with other guys, why? I don't know, I guess it's because I'm afraid of what the other dudes will say if I mess up, insecure in my own game I guess. So how I can get over this fear? Should I really be scared of this?
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
No. You should really never ever ask that question, "Should I be scared?" I don't care if you're at the edge of a 1000 ft. cliff, never be scared. If the guys give you a bad reaction, laugh at them, or treat Them like girls, and if they want to fight well then you have every right to use bottles, knives, or cue balls whatever in a 3v1 etc so have at it. No fvckin guy is gonna step on my feet or keep me from where I wanta go.ElStud said:I'm scared of going up to girls with other guys, why? I don't know, I guess it's because I'm afraid of what the other dudes will say if I mess up, insecure in my own game I guess. So how I can get over this fear? Should I really be scared of this?
As an approach? No way!Luke Skywalker said:Approach tactic: ASK how they all know each other - are they related? same job? is this some sort of club? etc.... just ask questions about the relationship of the group, or learn some group openers.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Uh... don't know if you've following me but I'm way beyond the "Hello/hi" thing and I've been approaching chicks for a while, sometimes getting interest. I've approached girls in groups of girls before it's just girls in a group of guys or one girl surrounded by several guys that scares me.GamePlan said:Hey ElStud, I posted on the same subject yesterday in my thread (or well I mentioned this problem). I think you have to gradually build your way up. Like with the saying "hello/hi" thing I had to start with senior citizens and work my way up to girls&women so-to-speak. Right now I'm only really "practicing" on chicks standing there alone or maybe with another chick, as it's the easiest option. Over time I'll want to learn to open girls standing in a clique, too, etc. but if you have approaching anxiety or something like that it's obviously easier to approach girls who are alone at first and move your way up.
I think everywomanshero said something about the cornerstone of cognitive behavioral therapy being building your way up and that most studies show, that people in such a situation who flood themselves have rather poor success rates, which is why gradually building your way up is your best bet. So well Im not gonna worry about that too much before Im comfortable approaching girls who are by themselves!