Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Should get you on the right track to getting in control of the situation againukboy1 said:Is going ghost on a girlfriend of 6 months a great idea? Surely it'll just convey a lack of interest to her?
ukboy1 said:Any suggestions just as a general question, been with her 6 months and I think ive made the mistake of chasing her too much recently, how can I spin this round?
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Signatures cannot be seen if logged in.GotED? said:Take note of my signature below:
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
That's very true and well said, because ironically enough I was obsessed over my ex-girlfriend and it did exactly what you just said. I was depressed and empty and relying on her to keep me sane basically. But after our break-up I was able to use the depression to my advantage and understand that I need to get my life together, hence where I'm at now. In a way she influenced me. Some people (like myself) need to hit rock bottom before it clicks in their head that they need to make serious changes.Espi said:You're right dutchmaster--spinning plates is just a vehicle. A method. A technique. Or, for myself, a way of life.
OPTIONS is key here. You seem to be very content with chasing your goals and desires and that's great. The underlying factor is, don't get obsessed with a chick and make her the The Reason For Living. That, to me, is how guys get sucked into emptiness and depression.
Have something to aspire to.