"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Fast Talker

CosMoenTropic

Don Juan
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Unfortunately I am one. I hate slow talkers who have nothing to say. At the same time, I don't like how when I feel magnetized by an idea/emotion I feel like I have to say alot to get the entirely of the point across, and because of this I convey it extremely quickly so I don't let my dialouge drag on for too long. Is this problem just specific to me?

I realize because of this it ruins the body language aspect of my communication and its not good. Girls sometimes get intimidated or probably annoyed when they have to process what I have to say so quickly.. It makes them feel rushed, and I can understand that.

Anybody with this problem? Any good method to consciously/unconsciously minimize this problem?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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SharinganUser

Master Don Juan
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Oct 1, 2006
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I am a slow talker and I find that it's the fast talkers that have nothing to say. It sounds to me that you aren't confident that people will listen to your entire arguement/idea, so you feel that you have to cram in as many words in the shortest amount of time.

Just relax and slow down. Try speaking from your diaphram instead of your chest or throat. Then when you are talking try to recognize when someone's interest is fading and do something to hook them back like making eye contact(if you are in a group you can't make eye contact with everyone all the time so scan them) or asking them a question about the point you are trying to make.

You should also consider rehearsing what you want to say, this will help build confidence. Another thing to consider would be to record yourself talking and listen to it latter.

If this is really bothering you, you should take a Public Speaking course.
 

Kwothe

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 12, 2008
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well all sucessful communicator are average speed. i am a fast talker myself, until i watch alan shore in boston legal. He is so smooth, and you look at his colleague who is a fast talker, let you see the contrast there, it makes a world difference on your speed.
 
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