"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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F*cking funniest text from a chick

Y

yuppaz

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her: ok Mr Yuppaz (?Last name? so I can run a background check)...lol j/k
Me: ohhh, Miss XXXXX no trust it's Yuppaz XXXXX XXXXX, now it's your turn
her: well XXXX is actually my last name, first name Kenneth
Me:......... (didn't send this, didn't know what to say, I know she's a chick but is that her real first name? did her parents hate her, DID she have a bulge????? I wasn't THAT drunk)
Me: really? How did that happen?
Her: lmao hahahahha kidding it's XXXXXXX
I was cracking up, never had anyone do that to me before, that sh*t was pretty damn funny. She got some points for that.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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G

garruk

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must be a "you had to be there" sort of thing.
 
C

CarlitosWay

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this is my idea of a funny text i got the other night.....
(after i messed around with a plate after hours at the local park , finger banged the hell out of her and nearly got caught in the act by a cop hehe)

after she gets home
"omg I just came all in my pants lol"
 
Y

yuppaz

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I thought it was hilarious. She was telling me she was a tranny or something and it caught me totally blindsided, the timing was perfect and I totally fell for it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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I

Ice882

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don't hate
 
J

Joe Stud

Master Don Juan
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Yup: you mean she ACTUALLY said her first name was KENNETH???

Thats hilarious! Funniest thing I ever heard in my life!!

She ought to go on the road as a stand-up comedian. I'm LMAO here, it is insanely funny.

"My real name is Kenneth" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA








Guys::crazy: Shhhhhh ;)
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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B

Boxer

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I do the same thing sort of. I like to tell girls I meet that my middle name is Danger when the conversation leads to middle names hahaha they always find it funny.
 
Kailex

Kailex

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yuppaz said:
her: ok Mr Yuppaz (?Last name? so I can run a background check)...lol j/k
Me: ohhh, Miss XXXXX no trust it's Yuppaz XXXXX XXXXX, now it's your turn
her: well XXXX is actually my last name, first name Kenneth
Me:......... (didn't send this, didn't know what to say, I know she's a chick but is that her real first name? did her parents hate her, DID she have a bulge????? I wasn't THAT drunk)
Me: really? How did that happen?
Her: lmao hahahahha kidding it's XXXXXXX
I was cracking up, never had anyone do that to me before, that sh*t was pretty damn funny. She got some points for that.
Click to expand...
Does her "real name" happen to be Annabell and her account is from PoF?
 
Y

yuppaz

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Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
 
S

scribblec

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yuppaz said:
Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
Click to expand...

wow your a fuking retard your 31 years old and your still going to clubs trying to find skanks, you then come here post a **** joke the first girl who gave u attention said... when people arent amused you go straight into a personal attack assuming everyone is **** with girls...

man go **** urself
 
S

Strelok

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yuppaz said:
Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
Click to expand...
Calling names and ad hominem on people that disagree it's allowed only from girls,we expect something more creative and less b1tchy from a man.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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N

Night Owl

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Lost in translation somewhere....
 
C

ChalengeGuyFan

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yuppaz said:
Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
Click to expand...
Lighten up, buddy!
We're just poking fun at you and you are the insecure one who takes it all as insults.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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