"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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F*cking funniest text from a chick

Y

yuppaz

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her: ok Mr Yuppaz (?Last name? so I can run a background check)...lol j/k
Me: ohhh, Miss XXXXX no trust it's Yuppaz XXXXX XXXXX, now it's your turn
her: well XXXX is actually my last name, first name Kenneth
Me:......... (didn't send this, didn't know what to say, I know she's a chick but is that her real first name? did her parents hate her, DID she have a bulge????? I wasn't THAT drunk)
Me: really? How did that happen?
Her: lmao hahahahha kidding it's XXXXXXX
I was cracking up, never had anyone do that to me before, that sh*t was pretty damn funny. She got some points for that.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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G

garruk

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must be a "you had to be there" sort of thing.
 
C

CarlitosWay

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this is my idea of a funny text i got the other night.....
(after i messed around with a plate after hours at the local park , finger banged the hell out of her and nearly got caught in the act by a cop hehe)

after she gets home
"omg I just came all in my pants lol"
 
Y

yuppaz

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I thought it was hilarious. She was telling me she was a tranny or something and it caught me totally blindsided, the timing was perfect and I totally fell for it.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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I

Ice882

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don't hate
 
J

Joe Stud

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Yup: you mean she ACTUALLY said her first name was KENNETH???

Thats hilarious! Funniest thing I ever heard in my life!!

She ought to go on the road as a stand-up comedian. I'm LMAO here, it is insanely funny.

"My real name is Kenneth" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA








Guys::crazy: Shhhhhh ;)
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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B

Boxer

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I do the same thing sort of. I like to tell girls I meet that my middle name is Danger when the conversation leads to middle names hahaha they always find it funny.
 
Kailex

Kailex

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yuppaz said:
her: ok Mr Yuppaz (?Last name? so I can run a background check)...lol j/k
Me: ohhh, Miss XXXXX no trust it's Yuppaz XXXXX XXXXX, now it's your turn
her: well XXXX is actually my last name, first name Kenneth
Me:......... (didn't send this, didn't know what to say, I know she's a chick but is that her real first name? did her parents hate her, DID she have a bulge????? I wasn't THAT drunk)
Me: really? How did that happen?
Her: lmao hahahahha kidding it's XXXXXXX
I was cracking up, never had anyone do that to me before, that sh*t was pretty damn funny. She got some points for that.
Click to expand...
Does her "real name" happen to be Annabell and her account is from PoF?
 
Y

yuppaz

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Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
 
S

scribblec

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yuppaz said:
Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
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wow your a fuking retard your 31 years old and your still going to clubs trying to find skanks, you then come here post a **** joke the first girl who gave u attention said... when people arent amused you go straight into a personal attack assuming everyone is **** with girls...

man go **** urself
 
S

Strelok

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yuppaz said:
Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
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Calling names and ad hominem on people that disagree it's allowed only from girls,we expect something more creative and less b1tchy from a man.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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N

Night Owl

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Lost in translation somewhere....
 
C

ChalengeGuyFan

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yuppaz said:
Kailix - No she's actually a smoking hot J-Lo look alike with huge tits, beautiful face and unreal @ss I picked up at a club. Damn, ok maybe it was only funny to me but some of you guys are seriously insecure @ssholes. Kind of sad really that you needed to go out of your way to say that sh*t. No wonder you suck with girls.
Click to expand...
Lighten up, buddy!
We're just poking fun at you and you are the insecure one who takes it all as insults.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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