It's been very hard for my to make solid eye contact without beginning to stare. I can feel my face tense up. My eyelids open wide. I stop listening and my mind starts racing. At this point I feel like I'm giving the other person a death stare. It becomes so evident that I'm anxious that the other person will get repulsed and or immediately end the conversation. It kills rapport in a heartbeat. And knowing all of this, it's still hard for me to correct it. I try keeping a slight squint with a subtle smile, but it only lasts for so long. I've tried the triangle method. I've tried just smiling my ass off. It keeps coming back to the anxious death stare. I also noticed that when I look away my eyes are like lightning bolts. Zooming around my skull. Cleary tense. What can a man do to rid this burden and lighten the hell up? Anyone..
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Eye Contact - Staring
- Thread starter jdbman11
- Start date
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Vice
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2007
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Sounds like you've got some inner game to work on.
Personally, I keep looking at a woman to catch her eye so I can wink at her and then enjoy her reaction. It's fun.
It's creepy only if you show submission by looking away when she looks at you.
Listen, a good way to practice is on cashiers. Build confidence with them FIRST. Here's my routine:
1. Greet her. Say "Hey, what's going on" or "What's up". If she asks you how you are, you always say "awesome" in an upbeat manner. (If she has a good reaction to this, you've GOT her. Get the contact info and get OUT.)
2. When handing her the money/card, keep holding onto it so it slips out of her hand when she grabs it. Keep doing this with a playful smirk on your face.
3. Bid farewell. If she tells you to have a nice day or a nice weekend, say "don't tell me what to do".
Do this a bunch of times and watch what kind of person you turn into.
Personally, I keep looking at a woman to catch her eye so I can wink at her and then enjoy her reaction. It's fun.
It's creepy only if you show submission by looking away when she looks at you.
Listen, a good way to practice is on cashiers. Build confidence with them FIRST. Here's my routine:
1. Greet her. Say "Hey, what's going on" or "What's up". If she asks you how you are, you always say "awesome" in an upbeat manner. (If she has a good reaction to this, you've GOT her. Get the contact info and get OUT.)
2. When handing her the money/card, keep holding onto it so it slips out of her hand when she grabs it. Keep doing this with a playful smirk on your face.
3. Bid farewell. If she tells you to have a nice day or a nice weekend, say "don't tell me what to do".
Do this a bunch of times and watch what kind of person you turn into.
playerone
Senior Don Juan
Don't open your eyelids wide like you're doing a shock expression. Get rid of the squinting, it makes you feel more tense. Just look genuinely into her eyes and no where else. Imagine you just laughed hard on your friend's joke, then you turn around and see this attractive lady. If you're laughing hard enough, naturally that would be the look on your face.jdbman11 said:
Stay relaxed at all times, and don't try too hard.