"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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ever deal with a girl in a long term relationship?

duke104

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I met this girl at a party last thursday and I couldn't help but notice she was pretty flirty with me (she kept grabbing me to go dance, lots of playful touching, etc) I knew who this girl was before I met her through a mutual friend and I knew that she's been dating some dude for like 3 years.

Later that night we were outside having a cigarette and my buddy asked her about her boyfriend. I forgot exactly what she said but from what I took from it it sounded like she wasn't too into him (I do remember her saying that at this point in the relationship she's only attracted to his personality, or something like that).

I also saw her the next 2 nights cause we were both at the same parties and I did notice that she was by me the majority of the night and not once by her boyfriend.

Anyways, the girl gave mer her number and we've been texting here and there. Would it be a bad idea to go after her cause of the whole boyfriend thing, despite the signs shes giving off?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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duke104

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sorry, stupid browser posted the same thing twice. please disregard this post. can i delete it?
 

Jair213

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i went through a long distance relationship, NOT WORTH IT!!! It was a DISASTER!! Plus your not only dealing with her having a bf but long distance too. Thats a BIG FAIL!!! You'll have a better chance hitting on the girl down the street.
 

Jair213

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oooohh .. pfft well in that case, in your situation, i'd try to just smash, see were it leads
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Alex DeLarge

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make her dump the BF first, then proceed.
 

bigneil

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All hot girls have a long term boyfriend. If she's dating you then she is losing interest in him but won't necessarily want to officially end it. Why put pressure on her? If she wants to see you, great. If not, she likes him. But to give her an ultimatum is pointless. Concentrate on getting her to like you more, then she'll be asking you for a relationship and he'll go by the wayside.
 
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