"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Escaping the Torture Zone

C

CJS

New Member
Joined
Jul 17, 2011
Messages
8
Reaction score
0
Back Story: Met a chick through a friend of a friend while home in NY over the summer. We hit it off, but she had a BF she didn't want to cheat on so we just chilled. A few months later she broke up with him and started texting me 24/7, saying she couldn't wait to seem me next time I come home. After a month of this, I went home for the holidays. We chilled the first day and had a great time, but she resisted any moves on my part, which I'm not used to. We spooned all night (I stayed at her place) and it was torture. I got aggravated and ended up not seeing her the rest of the trip. I leave, and the day I get back she wants to fly out to see me.

Now: She's here, staying with me for several more days, but it's the same situation. Not getting anywhere physically, but she's putting pictures of us on the internet and calling my dog hers. We're also having a great time hanging out.

I don't ever put sex on a pedestal and always just try to have a good time, but I'm not a strong enough man to have a gorgeous girl sleep next to me every night while I'm not getting any, especially when I have other GF's I could be seeing. I woke up today with blue balls I'd wish upon no man.

Any help would be much appreciated, because I'm clueless and going a little crazy.

Thanks
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

M

Maximummax

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2011
Messages
485
Reaction score
25
Location
Florida
You are acting needy.
She just did a branch swing, she wants to fill the gap of bf.
You now back off and act like normal, uneffected and be funny and outgoing. If you push hard she might move away from you and find an other guy
 
C

CJS

New Member
Joined
Jul 17, 2011
Messages
8
Reaction score
0
I hear ya. I've just been my normal self though. Not pushy or needy. Just showed her a great time, then when we went to bed I made a subtle move and we made out for a few seconds, then when she stopped I didn't push it or say a word of my frustration. I just acted like it was cool and went to sleep.
 
I

Iceberg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 19, 2002
Messages
3,110
Reaction score
136
Age
45
Location
Manhattan, NY
I agree with the guy who said she pulled a branch swing. Only difference is, you're not her f**king boyfriend, so you have no reason to tolerate this stuff.

Either she needs to step up, or step away. Now you're stuck with this girl in your apartment for several days, and she's not putting out. So that means any other plates you want to bang are inaccessible.

When I'm in your position, I just cut the girl off. She needs to be put on ice while she decides whether or not she wants to bang. But I damn sure won't have some girl sleeping in my bed night after night when it's not sexual. This isn't 8th grade.

She gets the benefit of a boyfriend (attention, Facebook postings, someone to cuddle with at night) without making any type of commitment to you, sexual or otherwise. F**k that.

If you're stuck with her for a few more days, the best you can do is cut off the affection. Let her wonder if you're losing sexual interest. Then perhaps she escalates in order to keep you on the hook.
 
C

CJS

New Member
Joined
Jul 17, 2011
Messages
8
Reaction score
0
Exactly. It looks like as soon as her BF was out of her life, she needed someone to fill that void asap. I would otherwise never put up with this nonsense. I've got other chicks that I'm having to tell I'm too busy with work to see right now. And sleeping next to me in my tempurpedic is a privilege.

I'm going to go cold asap and see if I can salvage something, if not she's probably going to have to get used to sleeping on a couch for the next week.

Much obliged
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

B

BigSmooth

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2011
Messages
374
Reaction score
17
Location
Texas
Iceberg said it perfectly.


Keep us informed. I'm interested to see how it plays out.
 
H

horaholic

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 12, 2008
Messages
2,254
Reaction score
79
Make her sleep on the couch. If she asks why, tell her straight up.
 
P

PapiChulo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 30, 2010
Messages
1,283
Reaction score
61
Location
Canada, eh?
Bring another woman to your place and have sex with her while she sleeps on the couch.
 
C

CJS

New Member
Joined
Jul 17, 2011
Messages
8
Reaction score
0
Update: Freezed her out the rest of the day, then she had a total attitude switch. All was well for the next 48 hours. Sex was great. Then out of nowhere yesterday morning, things got worse than before. Now it just sits on my couch texting and has no interesting in doing anything.

My mind is completely blown.

I'm just ignoring her and seriously considering having another chick come over while she's here, just to prove a point.

Any ideas? And yes, the couch is where it will sleep tonight if it doesn't fix its attitude.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Dust 2 Dust

Dust 2 Dust

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 25, 2002
Messages
2,163
Reaction score
680
Location
Florida
I wouldn't tolerate hot and cold behavior in my home. I would have already shown her the door.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top