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Doubting on how to act towards girlfriend.

MarcusVet

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Hello everyone, here something I need advice with,

So my girlfriend whom I been with for 9 months started to act different last two weeks. The typical stuff from"I love you so much" to zero of this sort, it's like talking to a friend rather than a girlfriend.
So the rational male in me asked if something was wrong...she ansered "no". Ok I believe her, then 1 week goes by and still the same thing...natuarly I start to ask myself if she was lying. I'm someone who likes to know the problem at the get go and solve it at the first sings. She acknowleges that she is acting differently but doesnt know why.

A side note, since the lockdown (the country I live in has implemented some firm rules) I haven't seen her in real life, only send messages, called or face timed. Also her mom with whom she lives, is a high risc patient when it comes to Covid-19 so my girlfriend is extemely carefull with everything she does. Hence the not seeing eachother.

Back to the main story. I said to her "listen, if you do or do not find out why you act differently, I don't care, I'm not going to change my behaviour toward you" this was because she got little bit pissed after asking the second what her problem was. Since then I kept my distance, never started a conversation, I let her do the honors. She most days she starts whit a "how was your day" and I just reply normally.

My first question is do I keep up this distance acting or do I start a conversation for a change?
Also we are going to meet this weekend( probably no physical contact as she is scared to make her mom sick)
So my second question is do I put her in place by saying she is acting disrespectful towards me and that she has to figure her **** out, think about if she wants to keep on going. This for giving her the feeling I can brake up with her, that I'm not going to get on my knees and beg or say such wonderfull thing about our futer to convince her. Or do I act like nothing is wrong?

Keep in mind that I do love her, we have things in common, same look at life(more than I had with my other girlfriends)and we have a great time together, so this could get into a serious relationship... but this just caught me by suprise because I didn't expect this kind of behavoiur from her. I don't see a reason for her acting dry towards me and she doesn't know why she is like that.

For those who are asking what I want, I do want to continue to have a relationship with her I just don't know how to handle this situation to avoid a down spiral.

Thanks in advance!
 

rart

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Yeah, the chance it will happend is like 99%.

You don't know what's going to happen or why she is the way she is and you should not care. You haven't seen each other for 3 months i'm guessing over some bull**** covid reason. If she "loved you" she would have seen you. It is over. Stop contact. Work on you shyt. Talk to other women.
 

MarcusVet

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You don't know what's going to happen or why she is the way she is and you should not care. You haven't seen each other for 3 months i'm guessing over some bull**** covid reason. If she "loved you" she would have seen you. It is over. Stop contact. Work on you shyt. Talk to other women.
You're right it's like an investment without getting something out of it. A bad investment.
 

jaymbrs

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I have to agree with @rart . Three months of no physical contact because of covid is a bad sign. My GF made every attempt to see me during that time. Hell we had more sex because of it. I would start the separation process now before she does.
 

Kotaix

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Anyone reading this thread, do bear in mind that there are countries out there which are imposing full quarantine where you get arrested if you leave the house without an authorizing document. Sometimes there is no option to see each other.

As for the OP's question. I think she likely found someone else, I'd start looking if I were you. If she wants to see you after lockdown then fine, and if she doesn't your options are still open.
 

Lookatu

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Action speaks louder than words. Or in this case, inaction.

Plus if you want to have serious LTR with this gal, she already failed the communication test. It can only get worse from here the more you invest in her.
 

jaymbrs

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Anyone reading this thread, do bear in mind that there are countries out there which are imposing full quarantine where you get arrested if you leave the house without an authorizing document. Sometimes there is no option to see each other.

As for the OP's question. I think she likely found someone else, I'd start looking if I were you. If she wants to see you after lockdown then fine, and if she doesn't your options are still open.
Love has no boundaries...or something like that.
 

MarcusVet

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Anyone reading this thread, do bear in mind that there are countries out there which are imposing full quarantine where you get arrested if you leave the house without an authorizing document. Sometimes there is no option to see each other.

As for the OP's question. I think she likely found someone else, I'd start looking if I were you. If she wants to see you after lockdown then fine, and if she doesn't your options are still open.
Yeah, where I live it was full quarantine. if you went outside without an authorisation you would get a big fine. Luckily it has changed that's why she has agreed to meet up.

The reality is that its very likely going to be a brake up if I just wait for it. So still going to meet her this weekend to say my goodbyes, maybe there is a chance she will admit why she acted differently (just for my curiosity) if not so be it.
 

BaldandBrazy88

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Hello everyone, here something I need advice with,

So my girlfriend whom I been with for 9 months started to act different last two weeks. The typical stuff from"I love you so much" to zero of this sort, it's like talking to a friend rather than a girlfriend.
So the rational male in me asked if something was wrong...she ansered "no". Ok I believe her, then 1 week goes by and still the same thing...natuarly I start to ask myself if she was lying. I'm someone who likes to know the problem at the get go and solve it at the first sings. She acknowleges that she is acting differently but doesnt know why.

A side note, since the lockdown (the country I live in has implemented some firm rules) I haven't seen her in real life, only send messages, called or face timed. Also her mom with whom she lives, is a high risc patient when it comes to Covid-19 so my girlfriend is extemely carefull with everything she does. Hence the not seeing eachother.

Back to the main story. I said to her "listen, if you do or do not find out why you act differently, I don't care, I'm not going to change my behaviour toward you" this was because she got little bit pissed after asking the second what her problem was. Since then I kept my distance, never started a conversation, I let her do the honors. She most days she starts whit a "how was your day" and I just reply normally.

My first question is do I keep up this distance acting or do I start a conversation for a change?
Also we are going to meet this weekend( probably no physical contact as she is scared to make her mom sick)
So my second question is do I put her in place by saying she is acting disrespectful towards me and that she has to figure her **** out, think about if she wants to keep on going. This for giving her the feeling I can brake up with her, that I'm not going to get on my knees and beg or say such wonderfull thing about our futer to convince her. Or do I act like nothing is wrong?

Keep in mind that I do love her, we have things in common, same look at life(more than I had with my other girlfriends)and we have a great time together, so this could get into a serious relationship... but this just caught me by suprise because I didn't expect this kind of behavoiur from her. I don't see a reason for her acting dry towards me and she doesn't know why she is like that.

For those who are asking what I want, I do want to continue to have a relationship with her I just don't know how to handle this situation to avoid a down spiral.

Thanks in advance!
So glad I'm red pill after reading all that crap. Ty.
Here where you f**cked up
Trying to get rational with a non rational being
Asking for the second time
Being moody about her not answering
Still going on the date after her wrong behavior
You losing all frame and acting feminine
Ps: she your GF but will give you no contact on the date, haha come on now
Good luck. To ya
 

MarcusVet

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So glad I'm red pill after reading all that crap. Ty.
Here where you f**cked up
Trying to get rational with a non rational being
Asking for the second time
Being moody about her not answering
Still going on the date after her wrong behavior
You losing all frame and acting feminine
Ps: she your GF but will give you no contact on the date, haha come on now
Good luck. To ya
If you don't make mistakes you never learn from them, trial and error. The thing is it's the first time, as far as I can remmember, I dealt with such behaviour. I wouldn't call it a date, I can just send her a brake up text but rather tell it in person, call me old fashioned. who knows maybe she will jump on me and have steamy seks hahaha. Don't get me wrong I'm made up my mind.
 

BaldandBrazy88

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If you don't make mistakes you never learn from them, trial and error. The thing is it's the first time, as far as I can remmember, I dealt with such behaviour. I wouldn't call it a date, I can just send her a brake up text but rather tell it in person, call me old fashioned. who knows maybe she will jump on me and have steamy seks hahaha. Don't get me wrong I'm made up my mind.
Most definitely bro... It's in all us men to try to fix what's broken, to figure $hit out... Sometimes it's best to let it be
 

derby1

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Also we are going to meet this weekend( probably no physical contact as she is scared to make her mom sick)
SHE doesnt want to feel guilty, for the fact shes got another man shes making love to. Its all about HER.

everything women do is so they dont feel guilty

Its like when they say "oral is for LTR" its because they've took a load off another man recently
 

rart

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Don't send the break up text. Chicks do that, as well as asking "what's wrong". Just stop contact, forget about her for a while. Give her a time out. If she comes back, then you'll think how to let her back into your life and your frame.
 

thinker

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@MarcusVet welcome to the forum. Now about your situation, ask yourself a simple question do you want to wait until she tells you that she needs a break or would you rather have the pride to walk away first with your dignity in one piece. Your time with her is over best to respect yourself enough to move on.
 
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