"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Don't get it, everyone thinks I'm successful with the ladies, when in reality...

teddy

Senior Don Juan
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I'm not at all. Like I've said on this board before, I've never even had a girlfriend.

And yet, because I'm sociable and well-liked by my peers, they assume I'm successful.

Nothing to do with my looks or frame because they are both below-average. Makes me wonder if I'm too friendly. But then once I think that, I start messing up.

Frankly, I'm a little puzzled why I've had zero success because even a blind squirrel runs into an acorn once in a while.

The good news is that I faced reality and accepted I've gotten nowhere and am in trying in the process to build myself back up. It just really sucks though when you see other betas have success. Oneitis doesn't help, either.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Mike32ct

Master Don Juan
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First, let me say, DON'T tell anybody that you are having trouble with women*.

You have a great rep as a guy that gets girls. Please don't ruin it by "letting the cat out of the bag."

Trust no one to keep their mouth shut about your real situation.

Post on here for advice. Seeking advice from female friends or even most guy friends will do far more harm than good.

The absolute best place to be is the guy that others know or believe is a ladies man, but you don't actually talk about it. Girls will see him as a smooth, sexy, experienced guy that they can have fun with, AND he's discreet enough not to kiss and tell.

*As the latest of "late bloomers," I learned this the hard way. This point about keeping it to yourself absolutely CANNOT be overemphasized.
 

CrimsonPanther

Senior Don Juan
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if you are sociable, and friendly, and still don't have success with women, try being more sexual (not a pervert). use kino, and escalate more aggresively. don't hide your intentions. be open about it, a dominant, but not intimidating.
with escalation, keep your cool, move 2 steps forward, if resisted, one back, try again later, just don't emanate that harmless guy friend aura. it leads to friendzone.
for all guys who are insecure: rejection is BETTER than friendzone. trust me it is. not worth spending time on lost cases when you could just next and bang another.
also, ask yourself: do the guys look at you as a friend or as a leader? do they respect you even? if not, there could also be a problem. if yes, just be more sexual :)
 

Vice

Master Don Juan
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Go out and approach seven nights a week for a month and see how your oneitis is affected.
 

Poop1337

Senior Don Juan
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It's good to be seen as a ladies man. Girls want to get with guys who can get girls. If people saw you as a loser with women it would only add to your struggles.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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JaegerPilot217

Master Don Juan
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Poop1337 said:
It's good to be seen as a ladies man. Girls want to get with guys who can get girls. If people saw you as a loser with women it would only add to your struggles.
yup women have a pre-selection mentality
 
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