Dont feel like dating anymore

[rjc149]

She’s not coming back to your place only because of verbal game.

No, you're right. She agreed to a date with you because she found you physically appealing on some level. But good-looking guys talk themselves out of sex all the time.

You can’t cheat physical attraction. A dumb good looking guy beats a smooth talking average guy every time.

Again, another sweeping totalitarian statement that is patently untrue. I've known classically handsome men who were just cringe-worthy insecure and socially inept. I've known classically handsome men who, like women, believed that their good looks alone were supposed to get them laid, and just stood there like wallflowers wondering why the girls were all going home with the less handsome, but more socially fluent and aggressive men.

Honest question -- are you physically average or unattractive?

 

[Robert28]

Robert, you've got a lot of hangups about women and you fairly consistently present a black pill perspective on women and dating. You're definitely not alone here on this forum, but you really need to get that handled if you're going to be happy, forget getting laid.

As is common with red/black pill ideology, the few instances of sh!tty women behaving in an entitled, openly solipsistic manner represents the gender as a whole. That small percentage of the female demographic who go on dates with men simply for a free night out is confirmed as the rule, rather than the exception.

Most women go on dates with men because they're looking for romance. Yeah, as lame and idealistic as that sounds. If she agrees to go on a date with you, she is giving you the opportunity to seduce her. Women like being swept up in those emotions by the man who can sweep her up. It's that simple.

If you're sitting with her at a bar over drinks, alone, on a date that she agreed to, assume that your looks, height, whatever, already met her standards. Now it's up to your game and personality to take her home. You're struggling to hook up because your game and personality is lacking. I think that's pretty clear in the disposition of your persona here. Bitter, frustrated, resentful, despairing -- women pick up on that. Get that handled.

PS: First dates should NEVER be over dinner. Dinner first dates put her on the spot, they're inherently approval-seeking and beta (way too much of a "treat"), trap her in an interaction in which there is no socially tactful opportunity to exit if she's uncomfortable, and of course, you better be paying that bill, which puts more expectation on her to reciprocate sexually.

If you meet for drinks at a bar, there's no expectation on her to stay to sit through anything. She knows she's free to leave at any time, which puts her at ease. There's no pretense of trying to impress her or learn her fvcking life story. You're just there to have a drink or two and flirt. You're sitting close to each other, not across from a table, where you can flirt and get physical. Alcohol lubricates conversation and laughter. Worst case scenario, you bought a stranger a drink.

I didn’t blackpill myself. Women black pilled me in my experiences over the years. The difference between you and me is you think you need to be successful with women all the time to be happy, I have never bought into that. Wait, I lie, yes I did back when I was younger. But as I got older I learned that I didn’t need them to have a fulfilling life. I didn’t need their approval of me to like myself. Online dating black pilled me more than anything, so did women that turned me down back in the day now all of a sudden flooding my inbox wanting to “give us a chance” when she’s fat and ugly now. I’ll be the first to admit I probably pass up more chances with women than I should but it also has saved me sanity and kept me happy. Women aren’t looking for romance these days, if they were they wouldn’t go on 100 first dates. That’s not looking for romance, that’s looking for a unicorn that doesn’t exist.

 

[Robert28]

No, you're right. She agreed to a date with you because she found you physically appealing on some level. But good-looking guys talk themselves out of sex all the time.


Again, another sweeping totalitarian statement that is patently untrue. I've known classically handsome men who were just cringe-worthy insecure and socially inept. I've known classically handsome men who, like women, believed that their good looks alone were supposed to get them laid, and just stood there like wallflowers wondering why the girls were all going home with the less handsome, but more socially fluent and aggressive men.

Honest question -- are you physically average or unattractive?

I’ve posted several pics of myself on here.

 

[FruitLoops]

Nothing wrong with putting yourself first. As you should but this kinda thing in your mind can lead to Blackpill thinking and it could be bad for you.

Maybe you would find it better to just forget about "the dating" part and just enjoy talking to as many girls as you run into. Without the goal of getting them on a date. Take the pressure off.

Yeah thats my biggest concern, becoming black pilled. I will take your suggestion and give it a try.

 

[rjc149]

I didn’t blackpill myself. Women black pilled me in my experiences over the years. The difference between you and me is you think you need to be successful with women all the time to be happy, I have never bought into that. Wait, I lie, yes I did back when I was younger. But as I got older I learned that I didn’t need them to have a fulfilling life. I didn’t need their approval of me to like myself. Online dating black pilled me more than anything, so did women that turned me down back in the day now all of a sudden flooding my inbox wanting to “give us a chance” when she’s fat and ugly now. I’ll be the first to admit I probably pass up more chances with women than I should but it also has saved me sanity and kept me happy. Women aren’t looking for romance these days, if they were they wouldn’t go on 100 first dates. That’s not looking for romance, that’s looking for a unicorn that doesn’t exist.

Well okay, we're at least in agreement that you are black pilled. Which is a sad, and extremely unattractive, view of the world.

And no, I don't think I need to be successful with women "all the time" to be happy. But you wouldn't be on an attraction forum if you weren't interested in women -- unless you're simply here looking for an echo chamber for your black pill views, which, unfortunately, you can find easily.

A large component of human emotional security and fulfillment is a partnership with a member of the opposite sex. Men and women both crave this on a fundamental, biological, psychological level. We can all deny it, insist "I don't need women! I'm on my grind! I'm building my empire!" blah blah but the reality is that this is a denial of one's own humanity. We want sex, we want female companionship. This is really the underlying, and over-arching, motivation for everything single heterosexual men aged 18-60 do. To make ourselves attractive mating prospects.

We're just not always willing to accept that we don't have options with Instawh0res and women in the top 10% of SMV. Endless negative comparison means that women who are not in elite echelons of sex appeal are "fat" "ugly" "used up" "post-wall" "6 tops" etc while we hyper-focus on the outrages of female hypergamy that only the top 10% of women can pursue.

There's a woman out there for you, Robert. She's cute enough, and if you treat her right and don't overdo the alpha game, you can keep her around.

I’ve posted several pics of myself on here.

Okay, I've never seen them. I won't go looking either.

 

[Barrister]

I didn’t blackpill myself. Women black pilled me in my experiences over the years. The difference between you and me is you think you need to be successful with women all the time to be happy, I have never bought into that. Wait, I lie, yes I did back when I was younger. But as I got older I learned that I didn’t need them to have a fulfilling life. I didn’t need their approval of me to like myself. Online dating black pilled me more than anything, so did women that turned me down back in the day now all of a sudden flooding my inbox wanting to “give us a chance” when she’s fat and ugly now. I’ll be the first to admit I probably pass up more chances with women than I should but it also has saved me sanity and kept me happy. Women aren’t looking for romance these days, if they were they wouldn’t go on 100 first dates. That’s not looking for romance, that’s looking for a unicorn that doesn’t exist.

Not needing women's approval is great. But just because he is successful with women and dating does not mean he "needs women to be happy." You're indirectly insulting him to build yourself up in that case.

I love women and enjoy dating them. My life has plenty of meaning outside of dating, however. If my rotation disappeared tomorrow I would still be happy/content with my life regardless. You can have both. I agree with @rjc149 that you seem very bitter and jaded. I know this is based on your experiences and a guy you converse with on a message board isn't going to just change your opinion. But know you can have success with women. There is probably a problem with your approach and how you carry yourself that you are having these bad experiences.

 

[Robert28]

Well okay, we're at least in agreement that you are black pilled. Which is a sad, and extremely unattractive, view of the world.

And no, I don't think I need to be successful with women "all the time" to be happy. But you wouldn't be on an attraction forum if you weren't interested in women -- unless you're simply here looking for an echo chamber for your black pill views, which, unfortunately, you can find easily.

A large component of human emotional security and fulfillment is a partnership with a member of the opposite sex. Men and women both crave this on a fundamental, biological, psychological level. We can all deny it, insist "I don't need women! I'm on my grind! I'm building my empire!" blah blah but the reality is that this is a denial of one's own humanity. We want sex, we want female companionship. This is really the underlying, and over-arching, motivation for everything heterosexual men aged 18-60 do. To make ourselves attractive mating prospects.

We're just not always willing to accept that we don't have options with Insta*****s and women in the top 10% of SMV. Endless negative comparison means that women who are not in elite echelons of sex appeal are "fat" "ugly" "used up" "post-wall" "6 tops" etc while we hyper-focus on the outrages of female hypergamy that only the top 10% of women can pursue.

There's a woman out there for you, Robert. She's cute enough, and if you treat her right and don't overdo the alpha game, you can keep her around.


Okay, I've never seen them. I won't go looking either.

I’ve been here over 10 years. For the majority of my time here I wasn’t black pilled. I’ve only been black pilled maybe 2-3 years, and honestly I don’t have a black pill view of the world, only the dating market and feminism. I don’t hate women at all, I just choose not to play the game anymore, I’ve opted out. I share my experiences, what I’ve had happen to me, what I’ve seen happen to others, I don’t just share what I’ve read or heard about. I’ve been called a prude by a couple women because I wouldn’t give them sex but the truth is I wasn’t attracted to either of them and they got mad. I’ve had some really ****ty things happen to me from women, but I know I’m not the only one. A lot of guys here are younger and chasing women is fun to them, I hope they pursue it and I’m glad to share what works and what doesn’t. But I know eventually they’ll be right here with me after they’ve swallowed the black pill.

 

[rjc149]

I’ve been here over 10 years. For the majority of my time here I wasn’t black pilled. I’ve only been black pilled maybe 2-3 years, and honestly I don’t have a black pill view of the world, only the dating market and feminism. I don’t hate women at all, I just choose not to play the game anymore, I’ve opted out. I share my experiences, what I’ve had happen to me, what I’ve seen happen to others, I don’t just share what I’ve read or heard about. I’ve been called a prude by a couple women because I wouldn’t give them sex but the truth is I wasn’t attracted to either of them and they got mad. I’ve had some really ****ty things happen to me from women, but I know I’m not the only one. A lot of guys here are younger and chasing women is fun to them, I hope they pursue it and I’m glad to share what works and what doesn’t. But I know eventually they’ll be right here with me after they’ve swallowed the black pill.

Do you seriously believe you're the only man who's had sh!tty things happen to them from women? That you have unique insight into women that few other men have?

Do you seriously believe men don't do equally sh!tty things to women?

There's a growth mindset, that you can improve your game and improve your skills with women, change up your approach, if they keep burning you. Then there's a fixed mindset, that it's all women's fault and there's nothing you can do but hate them and give up on them entirely.

You've been here over 10 years. So, if you've given up on the whole "women" thing, why are you still here?

 

[Robert28]

Not needing women's approval is great. But just because he is successful with women and dating does not mean he "needs women to be happy." You're indirectly insulting him to build yourself up in that case.

I love women and enjoy dating them. My life has plenty of meaning outside of dating, however. If my rotation disappeared tomorrow I would still be happy/content with my life regardless. You can have both. I agree with @rjc149 that you seem very bitter and jaded. I know this is based on your experiences and a guy you converse with on a message board isn't going to just change your opinion. But know you can have success with women. There is probably a problem with your approach and how you carry yourself that you are having these bad experiences.

I’m not bashing anyone. I just pointed out that he and I have different priorities when it comes to women. I wouldn’t say I’m bitter and jaded, that wouldn’t he healthy to carry around all that and to be honest I’m one of the most laid back guys you’ll ever meet. If I was bitter and jaded with a bad personality I wouldn’t have all the friends I have. I’ve been successful with women, but I don’t want it to define my entire life if what “success” is. I could get better with women and adapt to this new age dating culture and learn to work around feminism, but I don’t want to put in the effort at my age. I’ve had my time in the sun with women and had a great run, but as I got older I realized just how much bs I was putting up with.

 

[Robert28]

Do you seriously believe you're the only man who's had sh!tty things happen to them from women? That you have unique insight into women that few other men have?

Do you seriously believe men don't do equally sh!tty things to women?

There's a growth mindset, that you can improve your game and improve your skills with women, change up your approach, if they keep burning you. Then there's a fixed mindset, that it's all women's fault and there's nothing you can do but hate them and give up on them entirely.

You've been here over 10 years. So, if you've given up on the whole "women" thing, why are you still here?

I’m not trying to talk anyone out of dating women. I’ve never once told someone “don’t ask her out”, but I was honest about what he should expect. I never said I was the only guy to ever have crappy things happen to him, I just said that’s what’s caused me to be black pilled.

 

[Barrister]

I’m not bashing anyone. I just pointed out that he and I have different priorities when it comes to women. I wouldn’t say I’m bitter and jaded, that wouldn’t he healthy to carry around all that and to be honest I’m one of the most laid back guys you’ll ever meet. If I was bitter and jaded with a bad personality I wouldn’t have all the friends I have. I’ve been successful with women, but I don’t want it to define my entire life if what “success” is. I could get better with women and adapt to this new age dating culture and learn to work around feminism, but I don’t want to put in the effort at my age. I’ve had my time in the sun with women and had a great run, but as I got older I realized just how much bs I was putting up with.

Fair enough -- so long as that last statement is actually true and you aren't simply stating that to avoid more disappointment with women. Why remain on a red pill/seduction forum in that case like SS? I am genuinely curious since it seems that if you have checked out completely there would be no reason to be here.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

I have been in monk mode for almost 1 year now. During this time I completed my studies and got my dream job. But now after staying away from dating for so long, I am much happier and content with staying single that i dont feel like dating anymore. Is that normal? Or am i going crazy?

Normal. And extremely powerful.

Keep at it. If a women happens to cross paths with you and she compliments your life and will not distract you then go for it. But do not date for the sake of dating. It is exhausting, draining, distracting, toxic.

Modern Man Advice

 

[Robert28]

Fair enough -- so long as that last statement is actually true and you aren't simply stating that to avoid more disappointment with women. Why remain on a red pill/seduction forum in that case like SS? I am genuinely curious since it seems that if you have checked out completely there would be no reason to be here.

I’ve posted several pics of myself with women I’ve dated on here. I wouldn’t say I’ve checked out completely, but I’m no longer actively chasing women. You won’t find me striking up a conversation with a random woman but if she talks to me I’ll gladly talk to her, you won’t find me online dating, you won’t find what going out the bars or the club, I’m flying under the radar basically.

 

[Robert28]

Normal. And extremely powerful.

Keep at it. If a women happens to cross paths with you and she compliments your life and will not distract you then go for it. But do not date for the sake of dating. It is exhausting, draining, distracting, toxic.

Modern Man Advice

Yes! This exactly me. If a girl I like crosses my path I’ll make an effort but I’m not out seeking her. She’s going to have to make the effort too, I’m not about to do all the work.

 

[AttackFormation]

Yes! This exactly me. If a girl I like crosses my path I’ll make an effort but I’m not out seeking her. She’s going to have to make the effort too, I’m not about to do all the work.

I thought to myself earlier today that i wish i could have back the sexual psychology we (dont) have before puberty. In retrospect being in that state is a huge blessing, a real freedom, but it only lasts for a short time of your life. Then you only experience something similar but definitely not the same right after youve cvmmed, for a few moments before "the haze" possesses your brain and your life again.

 

[rjc149]

I’m not bashing anyone. I just pointed out that he and I have different priorities when it comes to women. I wouldn’t say I’m bitter and jaded, that wouldn’t he healthy to carry around all that and to be honest I’m one of the most laid back guys you’ll ever meet. If I was bitter and jaded with a bad personality I wouldn’t have all the friends I have. I’ve been successful with women, but I don’t want it to define my entire life if what “success” is. I could get better with women and adapt to this new age dating culture and learn to work around feminism, but I don’t want to put in the effort at my age. I’ve had my time in the sun with women and had a great run, but as I got older I realized just how much bs I was putting up with.

I would say a lot of your posts are pretty bitter and jaded, actually. It's not simply "I've grown tired of the dating game, I'm more focused on other things right now." There's a ton of "women only want tall men" "women only want rich men" "women just want free dinner" "if you're not mega Chad, might as well chop your d!ck off" in what you write here.

Guys are starting to call you out on that, so naturally you're softening your stance with your follow up responses. I think we just need to mercilessly call you out on your black pill BS until you stop.

 

[corrector]

Only if you are scared. How will you handle it when the reaper shows up eventually? Some of you folks act like you will never have to face mortality lol.

Everyone gets a turn through the gate

Its a further disincentive if you already have a problem. You are also forgetting that women can also use "social distancing" and move away from you without even rejecting you and hide behind the virus, right?

 

[corrector]

There's a ton of "women only want tall men" "women only want rich men" "women just want free dinner" "if you're not mega Chad, might as well chop your d!ck off" in what you write here.

He's not bringing up JBW though so he's not really blackpill.

 

[Robert28]

I would say a lot of your posts are pretty bitter and jaded, actually. It's not simply "I've grown tired of the dating game, I'm more focused on other things right now." There's a ton of "women only want tall men" "women only want rich men" "women just want free dinner" "if you're not mega Chad, might as well chop your d!ck off" in what you write here.

Guys are starting to call you out on that, so naturally you're softening your stance with your follow up responses. I think we just need to mercilessly call you out on your black pill BS until you stop.

That’s fine, I can handle it and I’m happy to defend my positions. I’m no different than a divorced guy who’s 100% anti-marriage. The stuff I say on this forum you can either hear me now, or hear me later when you see I’m right. Maybe not in every instance but I’m right more often than I’m wrong. I’ve got 38 years to back me up on my experiences, that’s hard to change when I can share examples.

 

[Barrister]

That’s fine, I can handle it and I’m happy to defend my positions. I’m no different than a divorced guy who’s 100% anti-marriage. The stuff I say on this forum you can either hear me now, or hear me later when you see I’m right. Maybe not in every instance but I’m right more often than I’m wrong. I’ve got 39 years to back me up on my experiences, that’s hard to change when I can share examples.

If you're 39 we are close to the same age and my experiences are completely different than yours. There are also older guys here who do not share your views on women -- guys who are older, great with women, and enjoy women. You keep telling us that everyone will come around to your way of thinking. I disagree. I am sorry you have had bad experiences but don't start acting like everyone is going to end up sharing the same viewpoint you do eventually.