Domestic violence article

[penkitten]

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence. How many members do we have that are now or have been victims of domestic violence?

 

[El Payaso]

Most men have been on the end of some form of DV from a woman. Especially verbal and emotional. It's just not as well socially recognized as the stereotypical woman beater.

 

[YawataNoKami]

I am sorry , "verbal" or "emotional" abuse ..........that's bull. And I am not talking about kids , talking about adults.

 

[NSX-R]

As much as i hate hitting women , if one wants me to treat her as a man , I'll do it.

In life you get treated always as you want to.

 

[hanni]

your wife will probably end up like her mom, so better brush up on your blocking of blows. If I didn't instantly hit her back by pure reflex, one of us would be leaving the house, within seconds, never to return.

 

[icantgetlaid]

when you let a woman in she will learn all of your vulnerabilities and whats buttons to push...and if she's twisted enough that will be all she needs to chop you down/verbally/emotionally demoralize your soul.

i'd take a classic fist-beating over that kind of abuse any day.

don't let her in then right? for some it's too late ... (blue pillers)

 

[penkitten]

I am sorry , "verbal" or "emotional" abuse ..........that's bull. And I am not talking about kids , talking about adults.

Are you saying that you were taught to stand up for yourself and basically you would tell someone to bite your ass or hig the curb?

 

[penkitten]

As much as i hate hitting women , if one wants me to treat her as a man , I'll do it.

In life you get treated always as you want to.

Like the saying "if a woman wants to wear a man's shoes"?

 

[penkitten]

I think this site needs a devoted thread for advice and support on this particular topic. Where they can be encouraged to leave a bad situation. Men don't come forward enough on this issue.

 

[penkitten]

I watched my ex-wife's Mother slap her father across the face...............because......drum roll....he served himself a piece of pie after supper. Borderline diabetic......I guess that was enough reason? a 50 year old man can't decide for himself to have a piece of pie, without a violent slap??

Sounded like a gunshot. I asked ex-wife about it later, and said "That was nothing. I have seen far worse"


DV is at least 50/50. Difference is, due to stigma and Police not believing, men don't report it. Trust me, there is ALOT of violent women out there.

This is the perfect example of abuse. Thank you for sharing it. A grown man doesn't need permission to eat his own pie.

 

[CuddleJunkie]

I think this site needs a devoted thread for advice and support on this particular topic. Where they can be encouraged to leave a bad situation. Men don't come forward enough on this issue.

that's a really good idea.

 

[NSX-R]

Like the saying "if a woman wants to wear a man's shoes"?

I'm sure many people misunderstood what i really meant.
If a guy attacks me by using violence ,I'll respond with violence as a last resort if things don't go better.
For example ,2 weeks ago , i went to pick up somebody else's gf . When the guy noticed he tried to attack me by using violence. I didn't respond and i proved the winner in the end cause i got his chick's number(Getting the number means nothing but that's another story) and didn't kicked out of the club.

What i want to say is that you have to analyse deeply the situation before move into violence and without experience on it ,it's not so easy to make good judgements. In my case ,my parents own a Pub and I've been in many situations to know when violence is needed.

As i said, i believe violence should never be an option but in some cases ,it's a requirement.

This is for both women and men.

 

[YawataNoKami]

Maybe because I was born and raised in a little town of Puerto Rico , different ways I guess.My father was and still the head of the house,same with my uncles.My mother never expect my father do the dishes , my father never expect my mother paint the house.

The point is if anyone ;men or women ; attack me I will responded with greater force. Been in a lot of fights in my youth and let me tell you something , in a real fight the goal is to eliminate the threat as fast as you can. Words only hurt if you let them.penkitten thats a great idea.

 

[El Payaso]

I am sorry , "verbal" or "emotional" abuse ..........that's bull. And I am not talking about kids , talking about adults.

Domestic violence can take place in many forms. From economic to emotional. Just because it doesn't involve a black eye doesn't mean it doesn't have a serious effect. There are a lot of different scenarios where it seriously affects men but they don't have the same vast amount of resources that females have.

 

[hanni]

many guys return to, or still live with "exe's"

 

[CuddleJunkie]

many guys return to, or still live with "exe's"

yeah. Scarcity mentality is only increased if you are constantly being reminded of how much of a low value man you are. It's basic manipulation, you make the other person feel like **** while convincing him/her that you are his/her only option.

 

[penkitten]

We raise our sons and teach them not to hit women. We may not realize we need to teach them not to continue a relationship with someone that hits them. Or verbally attacks them. And now the time has come that we must. Women are able to get lots of support and help but for men, there is little. One reason is pride so they keep it to themselves and another is without proof you aren't seen as a victim. Men are supposed to big bigger and tougher but in reality many big manly men still endure being mistreated. And what happens when a young man can take no more being slapped around? If he hits back, he is the one that ends up arrested. That is why we must form a support group even if we just sticky the thread for people to find it.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Yelling is domestic violence in California. It's hard for me to remember many relationships where I was not guilty of yelling a time or two.

As far as physical violence goes, yes there are bad men who beat up women. But what we'll never admit is that there are also bad women with psychological problems who will do everything they can to goad a good man into beating them.

 

[El Payaso]

Yelling is domestic violence in California. It's hard for me to remember many relationships where I was not guilty of yelling a time or two.

As far as physical violence goes, yes there are bad men who beat up women. But what we'll never admit is that there are also bad women with psychological problems who will do everything they can to goad a good man into beating them.

Check out this video: http://twitter.com/missnkay/status/598578140814954497/video/1

Domestic violence by women is REAL but society just doesn't recognize it.

 

[hanni]

can't be a man and have this be so. Can't say what you ARE, but a man aint it.